Does Marriage at an early age signify how smart someone is?

[Puzzlenaut]

career driven people just get married a bit later, that's all.

There may be a link with intelligence, but I don't think its the root cause in any case.

 

[Asuka Soryu]

Marrying to soon can be a sign of lacking intelligence. Especialy if you're getting married on the sole basis, you got them knocked up and now you're taking responsibility.

As that shows you didn't think it through and now you've been put in a corner.


Marriage is... not nescessary, it's not needed. Wich is why you should think if you actually want it in the first place.

A marriage has alot of things that can go wrong and make you second guess it.


You're gone to spend your life with this person, you're gone to change your carefree lifestyle to accomodate this new lifestyle with said person. You must make sure you understand this and know deep down you REALLY wanna be with this person and know full well that any of your quirks/personality could effect the relationship down the road. Especialy if you have kids.

You could end up being the relaxed parent, wich in end can make the other parent who's responsible and punishes the children when they do wrong, feel like they're the 'bad' parent.

 

[Colour Scientist]

I tend to think that getting engaged or married at a young age shows naivety and infatuation rather than intelligence.
Chances are it's going to end in divorce and a child or two who will have to live through said divorce.
I think it shows maturity if you're able to wait until everything has settled down from the "OMG we're soooooooo in love" phase and you've achieved a good amount of your life goals outside of marriage. I, for one, am in no rush to settle down.

 

[theevilsanta]

Tell us your thoughts on marriage when you're fifty or so, OP. A twenty year-old asking similarly aged people about marriage is like asking Justin Bieber fans what college is like. Almost none of them have any experience in it and those that do, well, they're not exactly representative anyway.

OT: I'm 25 and two of my friends (those I feel I know enough to judge their intelligence) are married. One is a sharp, college educated guy that has a good job at Wells Fargo. He married his high school sweetheart. The other flunked out of college due to alcoholism, got a girl pregnant, and got married at 19. He now goes to college and plays on a D-1 football team. I'd say he's a bit more intelligent then my previous friend, though his marriage has a lot more to do with impulsiveness than anything else.

 

[similar.squirrel]

There is most likely some degree of correlation, but I wouldn't bring 'intelligence' into the equation. To me, it seems to be a matter of personality, namely studious versus impulsive. Generally, those who get good grades are more critical and forward-thinking, whilst their scholastically-underachieving counterparts have a tendency to 'live in the moment' or 'follow their hearts' or some other scientifically-dubious phrase.

They both have advantages and disadvantages, but intelligence is nebulous enough a concept already without bringing in measurements that are the sum of many other factors as well.

 

[AstylahAthrys]

Yes and no. If you're stupid, you might get knocked up/get someone knocked up at a young age and think that marriage is the solution, or think at 18 you've already found your "One true love." I know a girl who graduated my high school with honors and is getting married soon, though (she was in my class and we graduated last summer).

As for myself? I've been dating the same guy for over 3 years now, with a hiatus for a bit while we both dealt with some horrible life issues. He's 20, I'm 19, but marriage isn't even on the table for us right now. Does that make us smarter? Hell no. My boyfriend is as dumb as a rock. Though he is the one who says "when we get married" and I usually say "if we get married." Perhaps there is something to age of marriage and intelligence. I'm not sure.

 

[StormShaun]

Frankly if I married young I would just think that two people love each other so much that they will do that, or figure out they are soul mates....etc, etc, etc

 

[reallycoolusername]

I often notice alot of smart kids have trouble unwinding. As the old "your a freak" kid i often noticed that they are unprepared to try new things and taste new avenues of life.

i always figured they were just scared of not knowing what will happen next. all the kids who i know that got an ATAR (australian, sorry) above 80 are now at university.

i guess their just doing the next thing on the checklist

 

[veloper]

It's happens more often in poor social-economic families.

Less of an issue of natural talent, but more to do with poverty and lack of education and future prospects these days.

Marrying before you got your career sorted out is a very bad idea.

 

[Leadfinger]

Did you see Idiocracy? I think that will answer your question. Watch and learn.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSROlfR7WTo

 

[omega 616]

This post, like many of my posts, comes with a very small story to try and place the set of mind for my writing this.

We all know my girlfriend story, I'm over that now, and if you don't know about it, trust me, it's finally gotten old for me too. Well, to refresh the story that makes this relevant, I had got my girlfriend pregnant and I thought an engagement ring and following wedding ring were in the mix. The baby didn't make it (She couldn't reproduce, I found out), but we were setting a date. Regardless if there was a baby involved or not, I did want to be with her, I wouldn't deny that. In December of 2008, we broke up, she gave me back the engagement ring and that was it.

Now, three years have gone by, she's married (I know nothing about her marriage life, I'd prefer to keep it that way), and I slowly look at all my friends and those I have graduated with. Some are getting married because a baby is in the mix and some are getting married because they found somebody they really like.

Although I have begun to ask myself that as I look at everybody that is getting married, I still see a vast majority of single classmates, and I start to wonder: The people who are not married yet are the ones with significantly higher GPA. I did not have a very good one (I think I was somewhere at 2.5) and I almost got married.

Now, the reason why I haven't, say, gotten married now is because my 18 year old self was walking on metaphorical sunshine and my 20 year old self (Soon to be 21 by next week) is finally starting to realize that real life is a very horrible thing, plus I look at my parents and wonder which one I'm more likely to be like (The calm one or the psychotic one) and think maybe getting married isn't what I need in my life.

to paraphrase Brad Pitt from Fight Club: "We are a generation of men raised by women, I wonder if another woman is really the answer I need."

But to the question to make this actually care some weight, do you think that marrying early signifies how smart someone really is, smart by Street Smarts? By GPA? By I.Q? Or is the pattern just simply uncanny? What say you, fellow Escapists?

I am 21 nearly 22 and I think getting amrried at this age or younger is a sign of stupidity.

I know one girl who has been out with atleast 10 lads saying how there the one etc etc etc and the longest it had lasted was 2 months. She was in a relationship for a year had a baby, broke up with the dad for 3 months have been back together for a month and are now getting married and moving to wales at the young age of 19.

Are you seriously going to say there going to be together for the next 50 years in Wales*? I think she is just wanting to be older and mature and it not thinking any further ahead than that.

I know another girl who got married at 16 and they have been together for nearly 4 years, no children or anything. I hope they stay together 'cos I am not the kid of person to wish misfortune on people I am ok with, even I do think it is a bit daft.

I just get the feeling people are rushing to be 30, even though they tout "they like to live as much as possible while there young". Come on 19, with a kid and a husband, already living by themselvs but planning on moving a significant distance away from where they grew up ... doesn't sound smart to me.

*I live near Liverpool in the UK and so does this girl, just to make things clear.

 

[Woodsey]

"Some are getting married because a baby is in the mix"

Huh? Are these friends of yours living in the 50s?

Anyway, I'd say you're stupid to get married young, but I don't think that links to your overall intelligence.

 

[InsomniJack]

I wouldn't say that GPA has anything to do with marriage results. When I was going to college, my friends were getting married at such a young age because they had been dating for like a year. I'm a firm believer that you shouldn't even consider marriage unless you've been with the person for at least two years. Some have done that, but others...

Yeah, in a sense, I could see how intelligence plays into folks getting married sooner, but I think there's more to it than that. Like it's a part of growing up and learning about how to deal with life.

 

[RachelKitten]

My husband and I just recently got married last August. I'm 23 he's 26. We have no desire of starting a family for at least 3 more years. We were in a long distance relationship for 3 years so we figured it was time to get married but starting a family when we're just trying to figure out our own live would be ridiculous.

 

[emeraldrafael]

I follow my dad's golden rule. If you cant live together for 2 years, you have no hope in hell of being married for 2 months.

Really its all about how prepared you are for it and if you are committed. We all know someone or heard of them who are now in their later life and married their high school sweethearts (you know, the guys that are 60-80). You cant say they're stupid for marrying young.

 

[pixiejedi]

Anyone who gets married young is a fool in my eyes. Damn near all of them end up divorced with a kid or two in tow...how smart does that make them? It doesn't make them smart at all, it basically makes them a statistic and only further overpopulates the planet.

We don't need any more bottom feeders (children) in all honesty.

Thats not necessarily true though, I've heard stats that if you divorce once your odds go way up to divorce again. Any evidence we can gleam is pretty anecdotal but thats because we might be limited to a circle of friends.

I got married a year ago and I'll be 25 in a couple of weeks. I've been with him for 9 years and he has a masters degree and I had a 3.0 gpa. We married not because of a kid but because we had been living 3 states away for 5 years and were finally going to be out together in the real world.

Friends of ours got married because their religious and were saving themselves, but the guy is in law school and she is studying to be an engineer. While shot gun weddings are the prototype for hasty marriage its not the only reason.

 

[bpm195]

There's probably a non trivial correlation that would show that GPA is inversely proportional time spent dating. By no means is it absolute, but I know far more people with very active social lives and an under 2.5 gpa than I do with very active social lives and over a 3.5 gpa.

The way I see it, GPA is the product of IQ and time spent on school work, and having an active dating life takes a sizable chunk of the time spent on school factor.