Domestic Violence Against Men

[Spygon]

another great example of how the wor;d just doesnt work its like a women claims abuse even thou the bloke hasnt done anything and it treated like murder case but the other way round the bloke is told to laugh it off even when a women is very close to killing the guy.It sickends me we live in 21st century ffs women can fight in wars but beating up a man thats impossible apparently

 

[Shycte]

This shows how much hypocrisy there is in this whole sexism thing.

[They] want equality , as long as it is for their own advantage.

I say Bullshit.

 

[Azraellod]

i despise the idea of this happening so much. it is unlikely i will ever get in this situation, but if i were to, then it's hard to believe that people would take into account the fact that i will almost certainly be the weaker party.

[They] want equality , as long as it is for their own advantage.

"equality and chivalry" you might say.

 

[axia777]

I'm glad you were able to keep your kid axia777. I don't have any research to quote or anything but it always seems to me the mother is more likely to retain custody of any children (my research involves a quote from the judge in Kramer vs. Kramer so I'd fully accept being wrong).

No, you are quite correct on that. The women often gets custody of the child even if the father is the better parent. It is more blatant sexism. But my soon to be ex wife left us for over a year and a half. She just up and split. The rarely if ever came and visited. I have been a single father for a long time now. So she is not really fighting me taking my daughter to California with me.

 

[Golden Gryphon]

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/jun/27/parental-abuse-domestic-violence
An interesting article I read recently about teenagers lashing out and hitting their parents.

Sightly more on topic I agree that there should be more equality in the way men and women are treated in cases like this. I think the general assumption is that men are more capable of defending themselves. It doesn't help that it gets much less publicity than domestic violence against women.

 

[Insomniac55]

Also: "'Men are perpetrators of domestic violence; women are victims of domestic violence,'"
This person should be fired and beaten publicly.

By a woman.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Realistically, and unfortunately, this whole problem is due to men's laws.

The whole creation of chauvenistic approaches towards women did leave them with a reduced QoL, income etc. but in the "rush" to grant Women Sufferage, little thought was taken to the male view that was left behind.

Remnants such as chivalry work against society now, by providing an axe for militants to grind against but also a path into danger for those seeking simpler times.

Universal Sufferage, as Civilization put it, is the thing we're all striving for. But the legacies that put the glass ceiling in place still exist and some are being subverted by women - against both men and women.

Men, on the whole, are stronger than women. That's straight biology. And if we ball a fist, most of the time, the woman will come off worse.
However, this is in our nature and society chastises us for this. That's partially why sex offenders have their own place in prison. To stop society shivving them.
When women fight though, generally, they will know they're outgunned and seek other ways to gain the upper hand, whether by surprise, weapons or backup.

This leaves a double edged sword. Abused women cannot get the help they need because courts still take authority from the men as well as abused men cannot get the help because that authority works against them. "How could this lovely creature hurt such a big tough man?"

And holding the sword are both sets of manipulators: The woman who appears as the victim to subvert the man's claims, and the man who paints the woman as "just imagining things"; who are equally subverting the system to protect themselves.

The real pain it puts into society though is that cases like this are believed/thrown out often purely on first impressions, impressions that are planned by the perpatrator and tinged with the beliefs of the prosecutor.

How do we go about fixing it? Far more difficult, but losing both the idea of "rough tough man" and "ikkle wikkle woman" would be a Damn good step in the right direction. Especially from the media.

 

[Pendragon9]

Three depressing stories about the horrors of man in one day. The end is truly near.

LET THE ZOMBIES COME AND FEAST UPON THESE ABUSERS, be they men, women, black, white or any of them.

I'm sorry. Between hearing this, an old WW2 survivor getting strangled, and a 14 year old girl being forced to talk about her rape, I kinda wish people would just stop the violence.

 

[Ultress]

It reminds me of a couple of cases that happened a while back. In one the man is accused of murdering his wife of 3 months and they don't even need a motive to convict the guy, because of aforementioned unfairness and the guy gets 25 to life.the( take that as you will) man was not said to be violent and loved his wife. On the flip side a women admits to killing her husband in cold blood but because he may have abused her she get 5 years with parole.

I'll put it bluntly double standards blow.

 

[Blair Bennett]

As a woman, I find this infuriating. People should not be taking advantage of others because of their sex, what they might gain from doing so, or what statistics say. The fact that this woman (and apparently, many others as well) felt the need to abuse her relationship (one that, surely, started for good enough reasons) with both her husband, and her children (dear God, if I had to watch my mother first manipulate, and then physically STAB my father...)sickens me beyond belief. It was at the point when I read the part about the car, and about how, if the man had tried to use it for the simplest of tasks, she would immediatly report it stolen, that I realized just how much power she had held in this situation. It was beyond physical abuse, and extended so far as abusing the justice system. This woman committed a felony and should be in prison (not a mental facility), just as any man would be. And part of the problem, I believe, is the lack of objectivity. The police officers called to the scene were biased, the woman on the phone was biased (enough to outright deny the reality of the circumstances at hand, I might add), and even after learning what had really happened, the police officers were still outrageously biased. The volley for women's rights was meant to gain women equality, not superiority, and THIS is why.

 

[axia777]

The Obama administration recently appointed Lynn Rosenthal as the first-ever White House Advisor on Violence Against Women. Vice President Biden, who wrote the Violence Against Women Act, said that creating the post will help the White House focus on stopping domestic violence.

This is proof that the ignorance and sexism against men goes to the highest levels of society. The "the Violence Against Women Act"? How about cracking down on domestic violence all across the board? This kind of crap just perpetrates the myths. Shame on you Obama. This is an EPIC FAIL on your part.

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Thanks for the sentiment.

 

[Labyrinth]

When woman what equal rights people seem to leave out the bad bits and we are stuck with them, I would make sure the police new that she hit me , but how do you react when a woman hits you and if you tell someone they laugh in your face?

See, this kind of social stigma comes to base-level inequality. Hear me out.

Many men see it as shameful to be beaten by women in any context, be it sports, gaming, or literally beaten to a pulp. This stems from the idea that women are weaker, so if a man is beaten by a woman, he must be even weaker than we are. Extrapolate that into law and you get the mentioned situations.

That too comes down to the idea that women and men are expressly separate and different groups who cannot possible be seen as just people. If one person is abusing another person in a relationship, the abuser should face prosecution.

So I say we remove the stigma and let anyone facing abuse come forward with that fact, free of shame.

 

[Foolishman1776]

Not my own experience, but of a close friend. His parents are both very angry people, and when they argue, they sometimes get out of hand, but they're both usually pretty good about just taking their licks and moving on. One particular night, however, my friend's mother flat out freaked, started just whaling on his father, she pulled the .22 rifle out of the closet, and broke the hardwood stock across his face. Cops showed up, and despite the statement of my friend and his mother saying that she started it, she did all the violence, they took his father away in handcuffs. It's lazy police work, and frankly, sexism, let's face it.

I've pretty much come to the conclusion that if a woman ever attacks me I'm going to assume the fetal position and cry pitifully, 'course, I'll still probably get arrested.

 

[leviathanmisha]

The world in general does need to accept that women are just as capable of violence as men, and the reality is that most guys would not be willing to admit it for the sake of "dignity".

I dislike domestic violence altogether but what frustrates me is how a lot of girls/women I know believe that women should be equal/superior but think it is wrong for a man to hit a woman in any circumstances.

I am not suggesting guys should hit women, I am very muc against that, but if you want gender equality then you have to accept that it just as bad for either sex to attack the other.

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You both have my respect for not snapping like so many others would have done.

If there is one thing I really hate it is the "you shouldn't hit a lady" line. This line instantly fills me with rage. I'm not a sexist guy so this really pisses me off. IMO any women who uses this term deserves all the sexist and stereotyping the media or anyone else can throw at them.

I only use that line if I'm trying to piss someone of, or if I'm messing with my bf.

Well, I can say as a woman, that we tend to get violent. I have an understanding with my bf though. It's kind of a, "You hit me, and I'll hit you back." This understanding seems to work, cause we've never actually gotten into a straight out fist fight. I honestly don't think that foreplay really counts as abuse, but I've heard that women have called on it before.

Spoiler

Also, I was almost raped once, so I can kinda understand where the whole female things fits into it. I was jumped in a deserted school hallway, but the kid didn't stand a chance really...kicked him in the nuts, then knocked him over the head. Then my Art teacher came looking for me cause I was running an errand for her after school hours.

And to the two guys above, you are both incredibly brave. I would beat both of those girls over their heads...maybe I'm just less tolerant.

 

[dodo1331]

Our society is so worked up with 'trying to make everyone equal' that every single male must never lay a hand, eye, or foot on a female. EVER. The ladies, on the other hand, may do everything they please.

 

[teutonicman]

Hey sometimes you gotta put a ***** in his place.

 

[bill555]

This is an embarrassment to the human race. I cannot believe the hypocrisy that still runs rampant in our society. The worst part is that none of it is shocking to me. I learned a very valuable lesson in school, and that was that women are not naturally more ethical than men. Both genders are equally cruel.