Zhukov said:
STEP ONE is to not have a fast travel system.
I agree with you in principle; however, the game
does have a fast travel system. It's just a bit of a pain to use is all.
Zhukov said:
You also need to make that travelling as slow and tedious as possible. So STEP TWO is to make the player walk really slowly.
Personally, I managed to more or less sprint
all of the time. That's more a factor of managing your encumbrance and the fact that the player's personal weight matters than anything else.
Zhukov said:
STEP THREE is to have respawning monsters
The respawning monsters
are the game. Without that, the world would be
empty inside of a few hours of play. If you end up actually liking the combat mechanics (and I did - they held up well enough for the length of the game), it's rather fun. Couple that with the fact that there is a monster hunter core and you basically always want something that the next enemy will drop.
OThat's why
STEP FOUR is to saddle the player with
three companion NPCs that never, ever, ever,
ever shut their fat fucking mouths.[/quote] You can tell your pawn to shut up and it works perfectly well. If the other two really get in your nerves (and I admit that they do grate), you probably don't really
need them anyhow. After about 10 hours, there isn't much you can't accomplish with two. If you just pick them up for one of the really hard fights (Drake for example) they aren't so bad.
Zhukov said:
STEP FIVE is to make that inventory management as clumsy and awkward as possible.
I'll agree entirely here. That interface is fairly terrible. Even after a long period of play I was making mistakes regarding where I was sending an item, noting if it was actually equipped, etc.
Zhukov said:
Lastly, just for kicks, make your game's story consist entirely of infantile drivel that wouldn't pass muster on a preschooler's fanfiction website.
The game's story, in total, is actually fairly good. The problem, as I see it, is that you get a story chunk at the start, a bunch of stuff only tangentially related to the story throughout, and a chunk at the very end. Given you can go for 30+ hours without really learning anything meaningful about the story, I'd say the way the story is presented is unambiguously bad.
Zhukov said:
Dragon's Dogma, ladies and gentlemen. Proudly demonstrating that the only thing worse than something crap is something crap that could easily have been good.
I was actually fairly surprised by how much I ended up liking the game. It certainly has flaws. For example, that pawns constantly talk and yet never, in
sixty hours did they
ever say anything useful or interesting. Why, then, do they talk at all?