Escape to the Movies: The Expendables

[Nomanslander]

You know I'm about the same age as Bob, and I get where he's coming from.

Having grown up on movies like this, I saw the rise and fall of 80s adrenaline fueled action movies and just how bad they eventually got. In the early to mid 80s they still had an endearing quality to them, Sly's last Rambo movie really showed how awesome and good they use to be. With the Expendables here, all I see is all the worse examples of what this genre became by the mid 90s and why it needed to die out.

The Expendables IS garbage, it's just big, stupid, loud, and has none of the endearing qualities that use to make these movies fun to watch.

Oh and Bob, did you really just say action movies got better, and then gave those retarded Jason Borne flicks as an example? Personally I think action movies hit a peak with 1988's Die Hard and nothing has come close to it still!

 

[LorChan]

Eric Roberts must have been in something worse! I mean, it's Eric Roberts. This is the Aaah-NOULD Master who randomly kisses companions in the terrible American Doctor Who movie, right?

Actually, if The Expendables is worse than the Doctor Who TV movie, everyone involved is authorized to off themselves this second.

 

[RandomWords]

What, so if we follow your word and just watch Scott Pilgrim instead of the Expendables we're not sheep?

Sheep: A docile and vulnerable person who would rather follow than make an independent decision.

If we take the advice of a movie critic, we are not sheep.

I'm not sure I see how the second sentence here is true? Reading through most of this thread it's either people being offended and sticking up for the movie, or people saying "Thanks for making my mind up for me bob! I wont go see this movie now!"

On this page alone,

Well... I guess I'm not seeing this one. I had my suspicions, but I had thought that it would just be a good bit of mindless fun. Now I see that it isn't even good for that.
I do, however, need to see Scott Pilgrim vs. the World.

Guess I'm not watching it then...

That seem's rather "sheepish" by your defination to me.

I'm not going to watch because I don't want to waste my money on something I repeatably heard wasn't good. He didn't make up my mind, he simplify contributed to the overall decision. If someone says "Don't put your hand on the stove or else you'll get burned" you don't reply "Well I'm going to anyway" because you will just end up with third degree burns.

 

[LilGherkin]

I saw Scott Pilgrim & The Expendables. I thought The Expendables was better, I just didn't really like Scott Pilgrim. The Expendables was alright, not good, not bad, just right in the middle. I got what I expected.

 

[Estolcles]

I think it's safe to say I was more entertained by the image of "In the image, he's Stunning, a few years later he'd be Stone Cold" Steve Austin and Paul "E. Dangerously" Heyman (I laughed for 5 minutes straight. I don't know why.) than I would be with the Expendables movie.

At least, not while under the influence. Being stoned makes almost all dumb movies better.

....

Except "Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector".... I couldn't get halfway through that movie sober OR stoned. >_<

 

[warprincenataku]

Great review, I'm skipping this one too. I saw 'Seng Lek Lek' last night and really enjoyed it. You should totally review that one.

 

[Boba Frag]

I must be the only one of my friends who thinks Jason Statham is a fucking moron.

I felt kinda sorry for Sly to be honest.... I tried to like the movie... in fact there are a lot of likeable things about it, but the dialogue still makes my flesh crawl...

Still, the automatic shotgun was ridiculously cool.

Haven't see Scott Pilgrim yet, but all's not lost- that will easily become a cult classic.

 

[mchoueiri]

Look, Bob. I've defended you more than I need have, you're probably one of my favourite movie critics but please, for the love of God, accept that not every movie has to be this artistic piece, with amazing acting, original set pieces and have an important message behind them. Some movies are just meant to be enjoyable to sit through. Salt was this and you appeared to like that even if there were two reasons attached to Jolie that probably helped your opinion along the way.

And please, stop stating that everyone who likes a movie you don't is worthless. Transformers, Book of Eli, and now Expendables - some people just like to sit through a movie that's brainless. Whilst they're not that good, stating that everyone who likes them is pretty much wrong is just arrogant and pretentious.

Not everyone who likes bad action movies is this douchebag frat boy, who can't tell the difference between an etch-a-sketch and a Da Vinci. Just accept that occasionally people don't see things the way you do, because you're starting to become insufferable.

you said everything I wanted to say. Thank you good sir.

 

[StriderShinryu]

Well, I saw both Scott Pilgrim and Expendables on opening weekend... and I actually enjoyed both.

I went into Expendables expecting a fun dumb action movie with a good cast that worked well together. Turns out that's exactly what I got. My only real complaint is that the fight scenes weren't that great overall. I, however, attribute that more to the current style of fight scene filming and the fact that Statham and Jet would make everyone else look like garbage in comparison had the scenes been filmed wider with less jump cuts.

I wasn't sure what to expect going into Pilgrim, but I absolutely loved it. I am definitely going to see Pilgrim at least once more before it leaves the theaters and I'll buy it as soon as it gets a disc release.

In my opinion, it's all about expectations, but contrary to Bob's belief, both movies are well worth seeing.

 

[Batadon]

Having seen this, I don't get how this can be such a "bad" movie but yet Salt was "good". Oh wait, boobies...

I just didn't enjoy Scott Pilgrim at all, and I'm probably its target audience. I thought it was very uneven plot-wise, and it felt rushed and incomplete.

 

[Shoggoth2588]

This review for some reason really made me want to hear MovieBob do a game review... and Yahtzee do a movie review...

April Fools 2011? One can only hope...

OT: Bob, we get that you hated the movie but please, please, PLEASE either don't say the F-word and S-word or, un-bleep them. I can understand the higher-ups not wanting you to go crazy with profanity but you never do. It wouldn't be such an issue if the videos were always like that but remember the early ones? The ones that aren't edited? The ones which still are not edited? Just something to think about...

MOTtB (More-On-Topic-than-Before): I have missed this movie. I still have no plans to see this movie. In fact, I just recently saw Toy Story 3 and Scott Pilgrim. My must-watch movies for the summer have been watched so, I'm pretty much set for now (expect Inception...need to get to that one)

 

[JUMBO PALACE]

Wow I'm quite surprised. I just got back from this movie and I had a fucking blast. The gun fights are great, the knife and fistfights and visceral and their are plenty of "oh shit" moments sprinkled throughout. I guess I'm just better at letting go and having fun than Movie Bob is.

PS. I saw Scott Pilgrim too and thought it was great. Not only macho roided out guys will like this movie. It's just a lot of fun.

 

[PeterDawson]

Okay, this is what bugs me about people criticizing The Expendables the way they are. I mean, I can get complaining about the camera work and some of the dialog since some of it was pretty bad, not to mention how incredibly awkward Couture's character was. Heck, I'm totally behind them dubbing over the names of the characters to be the actors' names instead so we can just know who's talking to who without the usual BS. It would be an interesting switch.

Anyhow, I realize I said 'this is what bugs me' and then commented on valid complaints. The story does not suck, nor does the action. The story is more or less generic, I'll grant, but they avoid so many traps like sudden romance and instead have the motivation for the small unit versus a small army battle be the guys just wanting to try and save their own souls. Heck, when Stallone's character claims he's there for the girl, I knew he was lying and it was about him, he just didn't want to sound selfish. It's not even redemption either, so much as just peace of mind. The act of knowing that you saved who you could and only killed those you were paid to kill. If it wasn't for Rourke's bits this theme may not of been that clear, granted, but it really make the story work. This isn't Megan Fox randomly holding flowers looking like she's about to get married for some reason (Transformers 2).

My action statement I'd like to clarify a bit: while pretty much most of the scenes you've seen similar stuff in other films, I emphasize the word 'similar.' You have not seen Jet Li and Dolph Lundgren fight. You have not seen Stallone get into a brutal fight with Steve Austin. You have not seen Stallone and Statham blow the hell out of a dock. You have not seen Terry Crews come to the rescue with a big gun that tears people to pieces. It is freaking awesome.

The best part? While sure the action is pretty much the equivalent of a live-action cartoon at points, it feels natural, if you can believe it. A place is going to go up in a huge fireball? The team spends several minutes planting charges all over said place. A guy is going to be utterly outclassed? We see a guy get damn near every bone in his body broken. While leaving your brain at the door can help, it isn't required. This isn't The Dirty Dozen. This is what happens when a crapload of guys get together to deliver a film full of fanservice that actually has a decently held-together plot. This movie occupies the glorious middle-ground between films like The Dirty Dozen and Transformers. I doubt people will remember Expendables in ten years, unless they're still churning out sequels which I really hope they won't be, but you can still watch it and enjoy it without needing to be beaten over the head with a hammer. It's fun, but not mindless fun.

 

[pearcinator]

ok I saw both Scott Pilgrim and The Expendables last week with my mate.

I much preferred Scott Pilgrim (even though over-the-top action movies are awesome, the expendables did nothing for me). To me the best straight-up action movie is still Die Hard 1.(as opposed to action/comedy and action/sci-fi which both have movies that I love more)

My mate on the other hand loved Expendables. He didnt 'get' scott pilgrim cos he's actually pretty dumb (it took him 3 watches of Inception to understand what was going on and he still didn't get all of it). His taste in movies can sometimes really annoy me.

How do I tell him that there are a shit-load of people who like Die Hard 1? It got 70 on metacritic which pwns Expendables fail-grade score of 45.

I should be the one liking Expendables more...I think I know why I didn't like Expendables much...

1. I dont like how everyone one is super macho. They all have friggen HUGE arms.

2. It didn't flow well at all.

3. I hate Sly, he can't even talk properly. How the hell did he win an oscar?

4. What the hell is with all the EXTREME close-ups? Are we meant to be making out with them?

5. The action scenes have all been done before and better. More variety is needed these days!

6. All the 'classic' action stars are now too goddam old! I can't stand looking at Sly's huge, veiny, gross arms (theres a scene where hes holding 2 guns at the start and his arms look so disgusting that they will remain in my nightmares for years to come).

I want them (Hollywood) to find new action stars and make a fucking movie based on a Matthew Reilly book! A good one would be Seven Ancient Wonders (7 Deadly Wonders in the US) as it reads like what could possibly be described as 'Indiana Jones on crack!'

 

[Zap Rowsdower]

Wow. This is your first movie review I've watched and I have to say that it will be the last. You insulted people for liking the premise of the Expendables, not just for liking the movie. You say that "no memorable deaths" but you then show the scene in which they kill over 100 guys by lighting them on fire. Scott Pilgrim was a terrible movie that you should not waste your time on and the Expendables was great.

 

[Yossarian1507]

I just got back from seeing The Expendables. While I don't think it was an utter piece of crap (I think Jason Statham was awesome enough to save this film from that status), all I'm going to say is:

Needs moar Dakka. Seriously, A-Team had much more (and better) action and this was supposed to be the most action-packed movie in a while. Rourke was a disaster as a character. Completely unnecessary moral dialogs, when everyone went to the cinema to see explosions and gun/fist/knife fights. Does not approve.

 

[Altair78]

I saw both Scott Pilgrim and The Expendables back to back. Since I went into the Expendables just expecting a movie of a bunch of guys cracking jokes and shooting stuff (considering that's all the trailer advertised in my opinion), I got what I came in there for. I didn't expect nothing more, and I got nothing more. Expecting a movie that's just advertising a bunch of dudes blowing stuff up to do more than that is a waste or thought and effort in my eyes, but to each their own I guess. You're still cool to me Bob and I'll still watch ya cuz listening to you cuss out movies is entertaining to me.

As for Scott Pilgrim, I was slightly disappointed. I still enjoyed it, but the Manga which it's based from has so much stuff that could of made it much more enjoyable, funny, and understandable. Now, before I'm cursed out, I'm not one of those "This movie sucks because it wasn't EXACTLY like the book" type of guys. But this isn't Lord of the Rings... the manga was only 6 volumes long and a lot of stuff could of gone in this movie replacing some of the stuff that was trash. But like I said, I still enjoyed it.

PS: Because I enjoyed The Expendable for what it said (or at least how I translated the trailer) I'm not a sheep nor a moron nor a bad person. Just sayin'.

 

[Giest4life]

"How much more succinct can I get?" Fuck you, too, MovieBob. Fuck you, too. I'm gonna watch that Movie this weekend, and I will love it.

 

[aeziir]

Message to MovieBob,
Please do a follow up video and say the following exactly:
"I just want to clear up some of the misunderstandings in reference to my review of the expendables. What I meant to say was simply that the Expendables is a piece of -bleep- and if you liked it you don't know -bleep- about movies and you are an idiot. Thank you"

(Would LOVE to see the forum after a video like that... remember MovieBob, even bad press is good publicity ) lol