Escape to the Movies: The Expendables

[bicepfetishist1]

I'm pretty pissed at the American viewing public myself, yes, I'm talking to YOU!

Well, I'm glad the Escapist still hires sharp and intelligent people such as yourself, Bob. You're always right on the money, give 'em hell I say! I'm personally going to buy the Splice and Scott Pilgrim DVDs. And I don't mean rent them on Netflix either, nope, I mean full price, as close to the source as possible. I really hope they can at least break even with DVD sales.

And YOU, yes, YOU, the American viewing public! Put on the dunce cap and stand in the corner, you know what you did!

That empassioned bias nerdrage defense of Scott Pilgrim Bob offered up in his Expendables review is...exactly what the major studio who fianced marketed and promoted Scott Pilgrim wanted/hoped/expected more 'hipster nerds' to do/say...

Bob's inablity to even percieve his own bias is pretty darn annoying... 'don't watch his reviews?' Don't worry I won't be.

Scott Pilgrim's presold audience is off the bat smaller than The Expendables. On top of that more than half Scott Pilgrim's target audience hate Cera with a passion. And the other half doesn't pay for the movies they download...surprise of the century it bombed? umm yeh.

This is all Sly Stallone's fault? Haaaarddly. The studio that financed Pilgrim just made a handful of miscalculations. That' all. They misjudged how hated and devisive Cera is and assumed just the 'Scott Pilgrim' brand alone would have fans of the comic turn up like 'sheep'. It didn't.

All any movie ever needs to do to justify it's existence (and perhaps cause a change in financing trends) is to TURN A PROFIT. simple. JUSTIFY the money it cost to produce. Period. That's it. Nothing else matters. Money talks Bull Shit walks.

Scott Pilgrim was a miscalcuation. Studios won't make that mistake again with movies of that scale aimed aimed at an audience of that size. The audience has proved to be smaller and more divided than was anticpated by Scott Pilgrim's financiers. That's all this means to anyone that matters.

Bob blaming the people who saw the Expendables for this just shows he really doesn't know anything at all about how the film industry works. Which for someone that considers themselves a professional 'authority' on it is simply unforgivable...

 

[jayman52]

Everyone's entitled to an opinion, but my usual interest for Bob's videos took a massive draining blow the moment he started going on about people being sheep because they like action movies with big stars in them.

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt here because you apparently don't know what a sheep is. Your post essentially defined what a sheep is. Bob had an excellent reason for calling the people who went to see this excrement of a movie sheep.

 

[bicepfetishist1]

Everyone's entitled to an opinion, but my usual interest for Bob's videos took a massive draining blow the moment he started going on about people being sheep because they like action movies with big stars in them.

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt here because you apparently don't know what a sheep is. Your post essentially defined what a sheep is. Bob had an excellent reason for calling the people who went to see this excrement of a movie sheep.

...wait sheep like action movies with big stars in them? Who knew? LOL

Funny how Scott Pilgrim was actually the movie that was marketed under the assumtion that 'gamers' 'nerds' 'hispsters' and anyone that likes the graphic novels would flock to it without question...like well...'sheep'.

The people that put up $80mil to finance Scott Pilgrim certainly banked on an audience of loyal sheep that's for sure...MovieBob's just butt hurt that he's a sheppard without a flock. He should stop calling people that don't follow him blindly names and do his job of presenting a case for his opinions as a reviewer rather than attacking those that don't share it.

 

[JBJCurly]

Dear Movie Bob,
You were right. The Expendables is a bad movie. I'm not sorry I saw it, but I'm sorry it wasn't better.

 

[JWAN]

I actually thought it was ok. And as for the lack of blood...? less than 5 minutes in a pirate gets blown in half by a 40mm grenade.

As for scott pilgrim. meh the guy plays the same role in every movie. Just like the actors in the expendables only hes a pussy. To tell you the truth Id rather watch a bad bad movie with explosions then an artsy colorful love story.

Its just not my thing.

 

[bicepfetishist1]

I actually thought it was ok. And as for the lack of blood...? less than 5 minutes in a pirate gets blown in half by a 40mm grenade.

As for scott pilgrim. meh the guy plays the same role in every movie. Just like the actors in the expendables only hes a pussy. To tell you the truth Id rather watch a bad bad movie with explosions then an artsy colorful love story.

Its just not my thing.

Exactly. Spoken like a man without a vagina! Amen brother.

 

[Genixma]

Well guess I'll go neutral. Not going to see Scott Pilgrim. And I'm not going to see Expendables. Might as well go see Inception for the 2nd time.

 

[ShawnShady]

the movie was really JUST fine, it was the best action movie i have seen by far, because action movies need to get a little back to reality, i totally disagree with you Bawwwwb .

 

[ShawnShady]

the movie was really JUST fine, it was the best action movie i have seen by far, because action movies need to get a little back to reality, i totally disagree with you Bawwwwb .

GO AWAY AND NEVER RETURN!!!

It is people like you that made this movie the most profitable...

I pirated this movie a few days ago just to see what all the fuss was about...

And all i can say is I WANT MY HOUR OF LIFE BACK!!!

Screw this movie and screw all its supporters! This is HANDS DOWN one of THE worst movies of the year!

Its one of those movies that is trying to be bad but ends up being SOO TERRIBLE that it actually ends up being bad.....

God this movie is abomination...

It's called a personal opinion you douchebug, be more polite and have your own opinion instead of listening to what some guy with a micrphone tells ya.

 

[Jabberwock xeno]

This review for some reason really made me want to hear MovieBob do a game review... and Yahtzee do a movie review...

I support this idea.

 

[LordLundar]

I have to admit, I have never heard, or expect to hear the DoA movie compared favorably to any other one, even if it's only because of tits.

 

[RustedKnight]

Nice rant.

Basically confirmed everything I feared the film would be.

Steroid induced washouts going GRRR blam blaM FUCKING BLAM for an hour and a half. Oh and Jet Li.

And for all those whiny butthurts that made me skip nearly every page of comments. J.F.C, you're defending a film which consists of bad actors (and Jet Li).. What the hell guys??
I'm gonna go watch scott pilgrim, yes the main character is a bit of a pussy, but he's a funny pussy, and the film looks good.

 

[Da Joz]

Just got this in the mail today via netflix. I would say that it is the worst movie of the year, but I can't let myself do that knowing that a twilight movie was also released this year. I like junky, bad movies but this one just got it wrong. What was the point of Arnold, Willis or Rourke? Why does the middle of the film only feature Stallone and Statham? I don't know but this was one awful waste of time.

 

[Obsidian Rocker]

I actually thought it was ok. And as for the lack of blood...? less than 5 minutes in a pirate gets blown in half by a 40mm grenade.

As for scott pilgrim. meh the guy plays the same role in every movie. Just like the actors in the expendables only hes a pussy. To tell you the truth Id rather watch a bad bad movie with explosions then an artsy colorful love story.

Its just not my thing.

Same here, man. Also, to add to your first point:

bob said in his review (I'm paraphrasing here) "There were no memorable kills through the whole movie"

That kill where Statham had this guy on his knees arched back then Li comes in, kicks downwards on the guys face and snaps his neck completely back?

To me it just seems like moviebob is some hipster that's crying "Wahhhhhh, the movie I like didn't get to number 1 so I'll bash the one that is at number 1" THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is what is commonly referred to as a fanboy. Stay classy, Bob

EDIT: Yes, I'm aware that this review is old but I saw Bob's review, thought "Fuck it, several other reviews have been good" and went to see it. This is why I advise people who look at reviews to make up their mind, don't look at one. Look all across. Get an average

 

[Mr_Jellyfish]

I was going to see this film, because in university it was kind of fun to watch all the old shitty, straight faced action movies. While they all still rock in their own strange way, this movie looks boring as hell. The magic has been lost. In fact, the magic was lost as soon as we watched Rambo, we all sat down expecting another hilarious, action packed movie like the days of old, and found ourselves watching women and children being horribly butchered, all so the film could justify Rambo's hard-on for killing people in disgusting ways. Somehow, it just felt soiled. Depraved. Sad. Our booze and snacks felt out of place amidst the scenes of horror. While Rambo sucked the fun out of the old school movies, the Expendables just looked flaccid and lifeless. A pity, part of me still believes there's room for that old school action movie, but I dunno... Maybe not... Oh and fuck Statham, he's almost as far down the list of interesting screen presence as Vinnie Jones.

 

[TheDarkestDerp]

Ummm... well, I loved it frankly. It was cheesy 80's-tastic fun. Lotsa shit blowin' up and bodies flyin... It was a great fun movie. I didn't go to it expecting or remotely wanting any deep message on any social matter, it was "The Expendables" not "Citizen Kane". Lotsa Booms and tough action stars doing what they do best, and it was great imo.

I was also surprised at the lil' bit of depth from Mickey Rourke about halfway in. His aside about 'losing his soul' seemed a bit of a lost gem to me.

 

[Scarlet Mongoose]

Way to let personal bias get in the way MovieBob.... or DoucheyBob.

Just because SPvTW failed, don't take it out on this movie.
I saw both. Both were good. For totally different reasons. Get over it, and get over yourself.

You clearly didn't like "Eat Pray Love", which means you've got a brain.
And I've liked most of your reviews thus far, but WOW, going back through your archives to find this, makes you seem like an unintelligent fanboy whining about the movie that did better than the movie he liked.

At least you had the good sense to acknowledge the fact that Dolph Lundgren is an underrated performer.

And your comments about choreography are ridiculous. This movie has great fight choreography.

And you reference "Doomsday" and "Planet Terror" as celebrations/elevations of junk movies, and presumably "good" examples of this genre. "Doomsday" was god awful, and "Planet Terror" was such a bad movie featuring Bruce Willis that it makes "Hudson Hawk" look Oscar-Worthy.
Way to ruin your own credibility.

No memorable kills?!
Clearly you weren't watching the movie.
Napalming the bridge, Gary Daniels sadly getting double-teamed to have his neck snapped right off of his shoulders, Eric Roberts getting bullets unloaded into his front while being skewered through the back at the same time... need I go on?!

And when a person implies that the blood and gore was the best part of a Rambo film, they let everyone else listening to them know they don't know what the hell they're talking about.

 

[tomtom94]

People are still commenting on this? If you like it, then buy the DVD. Bob doesn't read these comments and reviews are all opinions anyway so anything you say here is utterly meaningless.