Escapist News Wrap: No Sex, No Bacon, and No Minecraft on Windows 8

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vxicepickxv

Slayer of Bothan Spies
Sep 28, 2008
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Mr F. said:
You know...

From the sounds of it Windows 8 is going to be one hell of a ***** to run Pirate games. If that is the case this will be rammed down every single one of our throats.
That's what they want you to believe. I'm pretty sure it won't even take 72 hours from official Windows 8 release before piracy runs full steam ahead.
 

theblackmonk90

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Sep 28, 2010
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turrel1981 said:
theblackmonk90 said:
turrel1981 said:
theblackmonk90 said:
As this is a news show I feel the need to correct a glaring factual error. Minecraft already runs on Windows 8. The 'controversy' if you can call it that... Is the Windows 8 store certification. Minor misreporting but in a news show the facts do matter. At least in the UK they do... We don't have a fox news after all.
You can watch it on sky tv.
Thank God I don't have sky!
Jealous? if you did you would find it hilarious, better than any stand up comedy show.
Jealous? Of America having Fox New? No. I did a politics degree at university and Fox News makes me genuinely angry.
 
Mar 31, 2010
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It's interesting how many people confuse Windows 8 with Windows RT (The "metro" component of Windows 8). It is on Windows RT, that, apparently, Minecraft won't be able to run.

Windows RT is basically just a sandbox within Windows 8 that is aimed at tablets that can be easily compared with iOS and Android. The fact that Microsoft has chosen to make this new sandbox a part of Windows 8 itself is obvious, and I really dont understand the vandetta against it amongst so many people.

Would it also be against Notch's "principles" for minecraft to run on Android and iOS???? To be honest, I find it laughable.

And Windows is as open as it has ever been with Windows 8, by the way! I say this as a developer.
 

Aardvaarkman

I am the one who eats ants!
Jul 14, 2011
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Wow, all the excitement of somebody with a monotonous voice reading press releases, combined with the inconvenience and tedium of a video podcast!
 

Lugbzurg

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Mar 4, 2012
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There's going to be a major bacon shortage next year, huh?

I had to tell my sister. She was devastated...
 

orangeapples

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Aug 1, 2009
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Well of course gamers want bigger breasts, and we expect Team Ninja and everyone behind DoA to deliver. That means, bigger bouncy boobs on the females. But it doesn't have to stop there. Why not have a mode in which all characters, female, male, animal, spectral, all will have giant boobs. In fact, new idea here: a mode where both characters are just giant bouncing boobs.

They'll sell millions not only because of the desperate Forever Alone boys who have never even seen a woman, but add the thousands upon thousands of gamers who will get the game because of the pure craziness of the idea.
 

pretzil

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Jan 30, 2010
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Bloody clickbait video titles!

So I am to understand their will still be Bacon and Sex on Windows 8?
 

blackrave

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Mar 7, 2012
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I was going to skip next windows anyway (in the same way I skipped Win95, WinMe and WinV)
Maybe Win9
 

turrel1981

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Aug 15, 2012
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theblackmonk90 said:
turrel1981 said:
theblackmonk90 said:
turrel1981 said:
theblackmonk90 said:
As this is a news show I feel the need to correct a glaring factual error. Minecraft already runs on Windows 8. The 'controversy' if you can call it that... Is the Windows 8 store certification. Minor misreporting but in a news show the facts do matter. At least in the UK they do... We don't have a fox news after all.
You can watch it on sky tv.
Thank God I don't have sky!
Jealous? if you did you would find it hilarious, better than any stand up comedy show.
Jealous? Of America having Fox New? No. I did a politics degree at university and Fox News makes me genuinely angry.
i meant not having sky muppet