You need to fix this, one way or another. Of course, I suppose that depends on your definition of "fix", but something must be done. If you just sweep it under the rug like you have been doing, you're going to end up hating your life.
This is a big thing with relationships for me.... that is communication.
If you aren't trying to get with them and just want to socialize then let her know that, if she's so insecure about your relationship that talking to someone of the same sex as her bothers her then what have you been doing for the past 3 and a half years?
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