Anything from Weird Al Yankovic at his most inspired.
Also this, by Tori Amos:
"So you are a superstar? Get off that cross, we need the wood!"
By P!nk:
"Keep your drinks, just give me the money."
But if you want to make me cry, just play me the terribly sad Downbound Train or Bobby Jean by Bruce Springsteen.
Tears every time, guaranteed.
But one that most of you won't be able to get is this:
"Det var i Varadero
jag mötte Don Quixote.
Jag kom från Las Americas,
Du Ponts berömda slott.
Det ligger där på udden,
en pärla i Karibien,
med Mexikanska Golfens
gröna vatten under
slottets altan.
Och i biblioteket
hänger ännu tavlorna
av hustru och barn."
My translation, that doesn't do it justice:
It was in Varadero
I met Don Quixote.
I came from Las Americas,
the famous castle of Du Pont.
It lies there on the peninsula
A pearl in the Caribbean,
with the green water
of the Gulf of Mexico
beneath the castle's terrace
And in the library
the paintings of wife
and children still hang.
Of course I'm right.
But seriously, the translation is a bit inadequate (although if it's a literal translation you want, it's flawless) because I can't make it rhyme without changing it.
And the music does help a bit. It's the way he sings so melancholy about it, "and in the library the paintings of wife and children still hang...", like there's a sad story there you don't know about. But I think that shows quite well without the melody.
"If you know thugs for 4 G's you could be coked up
Involved in orgies on top of pentagrams soaked in goats blood
With innocent maidens, reciting rituals in a menacing cadence
I'm blatantly a sadist, making me Satan's acquaintance
My sepulchral corporals disobeyin' court rules, assault bishops
Burn 'em with liquid from the cauldron on the altar with chickens" - Necro - Insaneology
Yeah, that's 6 lines, what of it, are you going to argue with satanist gangstas?
Anything from Weird Al Yankovic at his most inspired.
Also this, by Tori Amos:
"So you are a superstar? Get off that cross, we need the wood!"
By P!nk:
"Keep your drinks, just give me the money."
But if you want to make me cry, just play me the terribly sad Downbound Train or Bobby Jean by Bruce Springsteen.
Tears every time, guaranteed.
But one that most of you won't be able to get is this:
"Det var i Varadero
jag mötte Don Quixote.
Jag kom från Las Americas,
Du Ponts berömda slott.
Det ligger där på udden,
en pärla i Karibien,
med Mexikanska Golfens
gröna vatten under
slottets altan.
Och i biblioteket
hänger ännu tavlorna
av hustru och barn."
My translation, that doesn't do it justice:
It was in Varadero
I met Don Quixote.
I came from Las Americas,
the famous castle of Du Pont.
It lies there on the peninsula
A pearl in the Caribbean,
with the green water
of the Gulf of Mexico
beneath the castle's terrace
And in the library
the paintings of wife
and children still hang.
Of course I'm right.
But seriously, the translation is a bit inadequate (although if it's a literal translation you want, it's flawless) because I can't make it rhyme without changing it.
And the music does help a bit. It's the way he sings so melancholy about it, "and in the library the paintings of wife and children still hang...", like there's a sad story there you don't know about. But I think that shows quite well without the melody.
If I may/And if I might/Lie me down, weeping - Do Re Mi by Nirvana (this bit always struck me as sadly beautiful.)
I can't wait for you to shut me up/And make me hip like bad ass/I can't wait for you to shut me up/Shut it up! - Shut Me Up by Mindless Self Indulgence
And I need you to recover/Because I can't make it on my own - M4 Part 2 by The Faunts (another line that strikes me as sadly beautiful)
probably anything from Honor Thy Father by Dream Theater
it's just so amazing how any human could express feelings about one's dad in such a poetic amazing way.
"All because of you
I haven't slept in so long
When I dream I dream
Of drowning in the ocean
Longing for the shore
Where I can lay my head down
Inside the arms of yours
All because of you
I believe in angels
Not the kind with wings
No not the kind with halos
The kind that bring you home
When home becomes a strange place
I'll follow your voice
All you have to do is
Shout it out"
-The Good Left Undone, Rise Against
"I miss the person that you were, but I don't miss you."
-Six Ways 'Til Sunday, Rise Against
It's hard to pick just one favorite but...
"Oh, how wrong we were to think that immortality meant never dying" from Our Lady Of Sorrows by My Chemical Romance
Come into my life
Regress into a dream
We will hide
And build a new reality
Draw another picture
Of the life you could have had
Follow your instincts
And choose the other path
You should never be afraid
You're protected
From trouble and pain
Why
Why is this a crisis in your eyes again
Come to be
How did it come to be
Tied to a railroad
No love to set us free
Watch our souls fade away
And our bodies crumbling
Don't be afraid
I will take the BLOW for you
I've had recurring nightmares
That I was loved for who I am
And missed the opportunity
To be a better man
The way it's sung, is just... Uber sadness. ESPECIALLY the last four lines. You have to listen to it.
"All because of you
I haven't slept in so long
When I dream I dream
Of drowning in the ocean
Longing for the shore
Where I can lay my head down
Inside the arms of yours
All because of you
I believe in angels
Not the kind with wings
No not the kind with halos
The kind that bring you home
When home becomes a strange place
I'll follow your voice
All you have to do is
Shout it out"
-The Good Left Undone, Rise Against
"I miss the person that you were, but I don't miss you."
-Six Ways 'Til Sunday, Rise Against
How about "We ran away. Now all my friends are gone. Maybe we've outgrown all the things that we once loved. Run away, what are we running from. A show of hands from those in this audience of one." from Audience of One or really any line from Hero Of War.
"Salute our fathers and grandfathers, we will be faithful in our oath to them! Now there is nothing that can halt the victorious advance of our native country. You sail on, sail on fearlessly, Pride of the Northern Seas, Hope of the Revolution!"
- from the naval hymn in Hunt for Red October. Transliterated from Russian, natch.
"The main attraction, distraction
got ya number than number than numb
Empty ya pockets son, they got you thinkin that
What ya need is what they sellin
Make you think that buyin is rebellin'
From the theaters to malls on every shore
The thin line between entertainment and war
The frontline is everywhere, there be no shelter here
Spielberg the nightmare works so push it far
Amistad was a whip, the truth feather to tar
Memories erased and burned to scar
Trade in ya history for a VCR
Cinema, simulated life, ill drama
Fourth reich culture, Americana
Chained to the dream they got ya searchin for
The thin line between entertainment and war
There'll be no shelter here!
The frontline is everywhere
There'll be no shelter here!
The frontline is everywhere
There'll be no shelter here!
The frontline is everywhere
There'll be no shelter here!
The frontline is everywhere"
From No Shelter by Rage Against the Machine.
And yes, I had to quote the entire first half of the song...
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