"What, NO! we can't stop here! this is bat country!"
"don't fuck with me now man, I am ahab!"
"heheh, the win-nah"
"theres many words to describe a woman who doesn't want to have sex, frigid, cold, uptight, but can you think of one word to describe a man who doesn't want to have sex?"
"...dead?"
"why is 3 o'clock in the morning always the hour of choice to put on nick cave, get depressed, and kill yourself? whats wrong with in the middle of the day when everyone is awake and ready to call an ambulance?"
and this one
"i don't suppose it'd be too late to ask for leave on compassionate grounds at this late juncture"
"and what grounds would those be?"
"grounds of 'I don't wanna get me head blown off'"
Shoggoth2588 said:
Randomologist said:
Inb4 several lines from Gunnery Sgt. Hartman.
"Do you suck dicks?"
"Sir, No sir!"
"Bullshit, I bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose!"
"Looks like the best part of you ran down the crack of your momma's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress!"
---
...
you know what, I don't think I can top those 2 Full Metal Jacket lines.
challenge accepted
"I bet you're the kind of guy who'd fuck a person in the ass and not even have the god-damned common courtesy to give him a reach around!"
"How tall are you, private?"
"Sir, five-foot-nine, sir."
"Five-foot-nine, I didn't know they stacked shit that high."