Feeling like an Outcast

[KazeAizen]

Ok this is going to be sounding like a pity party for me but I'm going to try my best not to make it exclusively about me. My guess if you've found your way to the escapist you have some fascination with video games, movies, comics, or other nerd culture centric things. As we are all aware of now since right about the time of Star Wars the nerds slowly began taking over the world, especially hollywood. Then right about the time of Blade, Spider-man, and X-men the nerds had completed their take over. At least in Hollywood's case with Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, and Google taking over the rest of the world and Nintendo taking over video games.

From about the mid 80s the "nerd" gained the stereotype of wearing glasses, braces, pocket protectors, etc. with their only seemingly redeeming traits being that they had good hearts and were generally smarter then everyone else around them. Still we formed our own culture over time. We were the outcasts, the ones that no one understood, the kid who got his lunch money stolen from him, and on and on. That's not to say all of us were like that. Still I'd imagine a good portion of us especially at a younger age were at one point or another put through hardships because we were weird and liked different things. We were dreaming of Star Wars and Slave Leia (hey I needed a joke) while they were dreaming of cars, football, sports, and "normal" stuff. When we took over though at the turn on the millennium we suddenly didn't have to feel the need to hide who we were or what we liked because everyone started to get in on the action.

We were the group that accepted the "different" people to give them a place to belong. I've noticed now though that we are not as tolerant as we once were, if we ever were. Sure it was either you like Star Trek or Star Wars or Nintendo over Sega but it seems to me that those debates were not as hostile. Now things have changed and it seems there are these certain "laws" now which you must abide by to be a "nerd". One of the biggest ones I've seen is that in order to be a "true fan" of Star Wars you must hate the prequel trilogy. You must act like they never existed and not find one redeeming quality in the movie. If you do or defend them in anyway you are an idiot and not a "true fan" of Star Wars. Oh and you must refer to George Lucas as Satan himself and never be grateful that he gave us such a fantastic world in the first place. Also every single 3D Sonic game is shit from Adventure 2 up to Unleashed. Final Fantasy XIII sucked and the two best ones are a toss up between VI and VII with no exceptions. The list goes on.

I post this here because it seems that as a nerd I have broken some very serious "nerd laws". I am one of the few people on this Earth it seems that enjoyed the Star Wars prequels and actually think Revenge of the Sith is the best of the 6. A personal recently called me an idiot saying I was defending undefendable movies and that I am not a true fan because I acknowledge their existence. This isn't the first time this has happened to me either. I've run into it several times over the years. So I want your opinions on this. Who are the true fans and why do you think we've become this culture that excludes people that actually do like nerd stuff?

 

[sky14kemea]

I post this here because it seems that as a nerd I have broken some very serious "nerd laws". I am one of the few people on this Earth it seems that enjoyed the Star Wars prequels and actually think Revenge of the Sith is the best of the 6. A personal recently called me an idiot saying I was defending undefendable movies and that I am not a true fan because I acknowledge their existence. This isn't the first time this has happened to me either. I've run into it several times over the years. So I want your opinions on this. Who are the true fans and why do you think we've become this culture that excludes people that actually do like nerd stuff?

Every culture has those more vocal jerks that will try and kick people out of their "fandom" because they have a different opinion or like something that isn't the original.

I get a lot of hate for liking the LOTR movies, even though I haven't read the books. (Didn't like the writing style, especially in the Hobbit).

I find it's a lot easier to just find a smaller sized group among that fanbase, and stick within them. Usually the smaller ones are more accepting.

Speaking of feeling like an outcast, though. I recently joined a D&D group in a gaming shop in my city, despite not knowing anyone who goes there. I did this partly because I do enjoy D&D, and partly because I really wanted to make some new friends with similar interests, even though I wasn't a huge player of card games.

Sadly, whenever I go there, I still feel like an outcast because I don't enter the tournaments or because I don't know how to play certain games. Also I'm pretty damn shy, so I'm not great at starting conversations with people. I'm trying to stick with it in the hopes that I'll gradually get used to the people so I'll be less in my shell, but in the meantime it is kind of offputting. So I know how you feel(ish?).

Also, your title reminded me of this song:

Spoiler: Mmm Disney love

 

[Fiz_The_Toaster]

I really makes me wonder why people go out of their way to chastise other people for liking certain things, or things that have been deemed "bad".

Anyways, I've been told many times how I'm "wrong" for liking Final Fantasy XIII and how I think FFVII is highly over rated. After while I stopped giving a shit because I like what I like and the rest can just deal with it.

I will say that when I used to play Magic The Gathering all the time years ago and I would never enter tournaments because to me it was a nicely little game that I could play with my friends. They played in tournaments and they didn't get why I wouldn't do one, and every time they talked about them I was immediately left out. After while I slowly stopped playing with them because they felt I wasn't "serious" enough, and I just wanted to relax and play a few rounds to unwind. I'm not the best player ever, but I liked it enough to keep playing and try new decks out.

I'm trying to get back into the game slowly and I know a few people that just want to play friendly rounds, so I do play with them when I get a chance. The moral of that long story was that you just gotta find people that aren't jerks about things and hang around them more often. Assholes are gonna be everywhere, but finding the few people who like the same things you do are totally worth they hassle.

 

[Zhukov]

Are you talking about nerds on the internet or nerds in real life? The guy who called you an idiot for example, was this on a forum or somesuch or in person?

Because I've never seen this stuff go down in the real world.

Then again, I've never really run around trying to make nerdiness some big part of my identity. If someone tried to call me "not a true nerd" I think I'd be in danger of laughing my lungs out.

 

[Rose and Thorn]

Because nerds are still people and people can be jackasses. I like all 6 Star wars films and I couldn't even tell you how much I don't care if someone doesn't like that I do. Sonic Adventure 2 was one of my favorite Gamecube games. People that are into geeky things arn't really that much different than people that are into sports. There will always be a group of elitists who think they are the true fans. I wouldn't ever say I am really part of a fan base. I've been into geeky stuff all my life, but I couldn't begin to tell you many of these "nerd laws", because I could not give a shit.

I know for many it is important to be apart of something, a group. A group as large as the geek fandom will always have differing opinions and immaturity. I feel like an outcast because I choose not to be apart of these fandoms and groups, not because I like geeky things.

 

[DarkSeraphim02]

I liked Final Fantasy XIII, and XIII-2, I think the Star Wars prequel trilogy is ok, though I grew up with the original movies, The best Final Fantasy is entirely subjective and IV is special to me because that was the game that got me to learn how to read.
Hell I love Castlevania Lords of Shadow, yet when I look around the internet the general attitude towards that game is that its "not a true Castlevania".

I don't know if I fit the definition of "nerd" or not, but if someone is going to say I'm not a fan of whatever simply because my preferences differ from the rest, I have one thing to say about that person, screw em.
They are free to like what they like just as I am free to like what I like.

I wouldn't worry too much about what others think regarding your taste in games, comics, movies or what have you. Heck you can use it as a screening process of sorts, if Joe Blow is going to attack you because you like say, Castlevania 64, then I wouldn't bother associating with the guy.

I know that might only intensify your feelings of being an outcast, but really, is it worth being part of any group if you have to lie to them, and yourself, by acting like you hate something you actually like?


Capcha: vocal minority

Heh, cute.

 

[Little Woodsman]

Speaking of feeling like an outcast, though. I recently joined a D&D group in a gaming shop in my city, despite not knowing anyone who goes there. I did this partly because I do enjoy D&D, and partly because I really wanted to make some new friends with similar interests, even though I wasn't a huge player of card games.

Sadly, whenever I go there, I still feel like an outcast because I don't enter the tournaments or because I don't know how to play certain games. Also I'm pretty damn shy, so I'm not great at starting conversations with people. I'm trying to stick with it in the hopes that I'll gradually get used to the people so I'll be less in my shell, but in the meantime it is kind of offputting. So I know how you feel(ish?).

So everyone in the D&D group also plays MtG or something?

 

[sky14kemea]

Speaking of feeling like an outcast, though. I recently joined a D&D group in a gaming shop in my city, despite not knowing anyone who goes there. I did this partly because I do enjoy D&D, and partly because I really wanted to make some new friends with similar interests, even though I wasn't a huge player of card games.

Sadly, whenever I go there, I still feel like an outcast because I don't enter the tournaments or because I don't know how to play certain games. Also I'm pretty damn shy, so I'm not great at starting conversations with people. I'm trying to stick with it in the hopes that I'll gradually get used to the people so I'll be less in my shell, but in the meantime it is kind of offputting. So I know how you feel(ish?).

So everyone in the D&D group also plays MtG or something?

Sort of. They all have different interests too, like TV shows or Comic Books, which I'm not huge on.

Also most of the store either play MtG, Yu-Gi-Oh or a new Pokemon card game that I've ever heard of.

 

[Raikas]

I post this here because it seems that as a nerd I have broken some very serious "nerd laws". I am one of the few people on this Earth it seems that enjoyed the Star Wars prequels and actually think Revenge of the Sith is the best of the 6. A personal recently called me an idiot saying I was defending undefendable movies and that I am not a true fan because I acknowledge their existence. This isn't the first time this has happened to me either. I've run into it several times over the years. So I want your opinions on this. Who are the true fans and why do you think we've become this culture that excludes people that actually do like nerd stuff?

Eh, given how much money the Star Wars prequels made, I very much doubt that you're one of the few people on earth who enjoyed them.

Anyway, anyone who thinks that there's some objective defining feature of a "true fan" of something isn't worth talking to. Judging someone based on their some minor difference in their consumption of pop culture is absurd - the whole notion that they're a right and wrong way to enjoy this stuff is eye-rollingly ridiculous.

So to answer your question: There are no "true fans", there are just fans. And why are people like that? Because they want to make themselves feel better by slapping other people down and being generally smug.

 

[Little Woodsman]

Speaking of feeling like an outcast, though. I recently joined a D&D group in a gaming shop in my city, despite not knowing anyone who goes there. I did this partly because I do enjoy D&D, and partly because I really wanted to make some new friends with similar interests, even though I wasn't a huge player of card games.

Sadly, whenever I go there, I still feel like an outcast because I don't enter the tournaments or because I don't know how to play certain games. Also I'm pretty damn shy, so I'm not great at starting conversations with people. I'm trying to stick with it in the hopes that I'll gradually get used to the people so I'll be less in my shell, but in the meantime it is kind of offputting. So I know how you feel(ish?).

So everyone in the D&D group also plays MtG or something?

Sort of. They all have different interests too, like TV shows or Comic Books, which I'm not huge on.

Also most of the store either play MtG, Yu-Gi-Oh or a new Pokemon card game that I've ever heard of.

Oh, I see. Well imhho a 'D&D' group that actually has varied interests is probably a better place to begin socializing than one that just focuses on D&D. As you get more used to them try introducing them to some of your interests, or try some of theirs that you haven't before. Maybe offer to run a second campaign for the group. You'll suss it out and make some friends, so long as you stick with it.

 

[sky14kemea]

Oh, I see. Well imhho a 'D&D' group that actually has varied interests is probably a better place to begin socializing than one that just focuses on D&D. As you get more used to them try introducing them to some of your interests, or try some of theirs that you haven't before. Maybe offer to run a second campaign for the group. You'll suss it out and make some friends, so long as you stick with it.

Fair enough, I am trying to stick with it. I think my biggest barrier is the actual shyness of new people.

Don't know if I'm willing to run a whole campaign by myself, but I'm willing to try out some card games. xD

 

[Venom 3135]

I post this here because it seems that as a nerd I have broken some very serious "nerd laws". I am one of the few people on this Earth it seems that enjoyed the Star Wars prequels and actually think Revenge of the Sith is the best of the 6. A personal recently called me an idiot saying I was defending undefendable movies and that I am not a true fan because I acknowledge their existence. This isn't the first time this has happened to me either. I've run into it several times over the years. So I want your opinions on this. Who are the true fans and why do you think we've become this culture that excludes people that actually do like nerd stuff?

I might be too young to qualify here, but I agree that Revenge of the Sith is the best of the 6 films. I remember, my dad hated it, but I made him take me 3 times to see it because I loved it so much.

And I also loved Final Fantasy XIII.

It's sad though, because what you say about "nerd" rules is 100% true. But what I've noticed recently is that the rules we think we have to follow are actually broken by a much larger group of people than you'd expect. One thing that I saw that made me realize this was the reviews for Spider-Man 3 on flixster. Back when that film was released, I was relatively young and fucking loved it. I still do. But when that No Right Answer video was posted about which film being worse, Spider-Man 3 or Pirates of The Caribbean 3, I realized that hating Spider-Man 3 was one of those rules. Despite this, the reviews weren't that bad. That was when I decided, fuck the rules. Like whatever the fuck you want to like.

Seriously, I understand the way the rules can make you feel when you break them, but it's better to just ignore them. They're simply in place to make people feel like a greater part of the ever-growing "nerd culture".

 

[Chromatic Aberration]

I despise the notion that everything has to be some sort of "culture" (whatever that's supposed to mean) or that there has to be some weird fraternity/secret society thing going on where there are some sort of rules or even a stringent set of values that one can just point to and say that everyone adheres to it, thinks in a certain way or likes a some specific thing. This is simply not the case. People are different, will like different things to a different degree and won't identify to the same degree to whatever some supposed "culture" he or she seems to belong to.

Take me for instance, I never really thought of myself as a "geek", "nerd" or even "gamer" - I'm simply someone who likes stuff such as animes, RPGs, Fantasy, Sci-Fi, video games, my pc and science and really don't give a crap about whatever supposed label that would put me under. Those are things I like and that's all there is to it. It does not make me and I think any separation between "normal" interests and them is also very much superfluous. People who overly define with such seem to me more like grasping for straws, desperately searching for a group that makes them "be". It's just another example of human tribalism really which is also a rather ridiculous endeavour to begin with in this case.

 

[Hero of Lime]

People get waaaaaaaay too overzealous about their hatred of the Star Wars prequels. So yeah, you're not the only one who thinks they not are the spawn of super Satan. If people are being total jerks to you over some movies, they're the real losers of the situation.

 

[krazykidd]

Damn people are so damn sensitive . If you can't take a few jabs every once in a while , stay indoors and stay off the internet . Seriously , these things don't matter , like at all . Hell they build character and thick skin . If you like something , say you like it , and why. End of story .

 

[Ratties]

This shit makes me laugh. Oh the hypocrites are out tonight. Know people like to go with the mob mentality on certain things. You just have to wait a little while. Some guy will post on here about how much he hated the Star Wars prequels, all these people will jump on the bandwagon. Of course I have seen it run rampant on here all the time. Person poses a question like this, "I can't believe people are still buying Pokemon games." Read the comments, people will agree with him, others won't. Another person will post something like this, "I can't wait for Pokemon X and Y." Now all those people that hated it, are suddenly happy about it now. Of course there are a few cases where people actually stick to their guns, most people don't.

 

[KazeAizen]

I post this here because it seems that as a nerd I have broken some very serious "nerd laws". I am one of the few people on this Earth it seems that enjoyed the Star Wars prequels and actually think Revenge of the Sith is the best of the 6. A personal recently called me an idiot saying I was defending undefendable movies and that I am not a true fan because I acknowledge their existence. This isn't the first time this has happened to me either. I've run into it several times over the years. So I want your opinions on this. Who are the true fans and why do you think we've become this culture that excludes people that actually do like nerd stuff?

I might be too young to qualify here, but I agree that Revenge of the Sith is the best of the 6 films. I remember, my dad hated it, but I made him take me 3 times to see it because I loved it so much.

And I also loved Final Fantasy XIII.

It's sad though, because what you say about "nerd" rules is 100% true. But what I've noticed recently is that the rules we think we have to follow are actually broken by a much larger group of people than you'd expect. One thing that I saw that made me realize this was the reviews for Spider-Man 3 on flixster. Back when that film was released, I was relatively young and fucking loved it. I still do. But when that No Right Answer video was posted about which film being worse, Spider-Man 3 or Pirates of The Caribbean 3, I realized that hating Spider-Man 3 was one of those rules. Despite this, the reviews weren't that bad. That was when I decided, fuck the rules. Like whatever the fuck you want to like.

Seriously, I understand the way the rules can make you feel when you break them, but it's better to just ignore them. They're simply in place to make people feel like a greater part of the ever-growing "nerd culture".

There's another rule I forgot Spider-man 3 is terrible and didn't happen. Now I will be the first to tell you that it was a tad obvious the studio shoved Venom in the movie and that they didn't handle the black suit as well as they could have, but over all I didn't think it was anything horrendous. Hell it seems like a new "rule" is forming about Iron Man 3 in that "it didn't happen" because of one certain twist in the movie.

I don't know how young you are. Personally I'm 22 so the new movies were coming out between when I was like 9-12 so I grew up with them and got to enjoy them. My parents never said anything to the contrary. Then again I'm not even sure of my parents taste in movies as my mom wanted to go see The Last Airbender again and that is a movie with little to no redeeming qualities to me. Just as a movie in and of itself it didn't work.

I guess my biggest issue with this is that we are becoming more like those social clubs and what not that used to hypothetically throw us out. "Oh yeah you can stay so long as you like it." (subtext but the second you don't like it the way we do your ass is grass). Simultaneously the most accepting and the most rejecting culture on the Earth. I shouldn't let it get to me and I guess the only reason I put this topic here was because after so long I was reminded of just how unaccepting and horrible we can be and it just so happened I now am a part of a place I could talk about it. So I figured why not?

 

[KazeAizen]

Damn people are so damn sensitive . If you can't take a few jabs every once in a while , stay indoors and stay off the internet . Seriously , these things don't matter , like at all . Hell they build character and thick skin . If you like something , say you like it , and why. End of story .

I can take a few jabs and its not like they damaged my self esteem. I just had a recent experience which reminded me of past experiences over the years so I thought I'd talk about it and try to get different people's perspectives and stories. Just a little back and forth conversation on something that has bugged me for some time but I've never really had the chance or the right people to talk about it with.