Finding girls/people like me; where to start? How to start?

[Cowabungaa]

First of all, this ain't your typical 'girl thread' with all kinds of "Woe is me!" stuff. Really I'm way past that. Thing is, I know that the usual advice to 'stop looking' is nonsense, because girls don't just come ringing at your front door, so I realise I have to make an effort.

So what am I asking? Well, simply put, I don't really know where I can find girls like me, girls that 'get' a guy like me. Of course I'm a geek, and yes I'm a sufficiently big enough geek, with sufficiently big enough geek interests and behaviors, that I am of course looking for a girl that's also geeky in a certain degree. But at the same time, I'm not exactly the geeky stereotype; I try to take care of myself, and I think I succeed at least moderatly, and I actually like sports a bit. I also like to think that I'm a bit more outgoing than most nerdy people, but still no clubbing and binge drinking and all that.

But the thing is, I haven't got a clue where I should look. I've tried game shops, even joining a game club. But alas, to no avail. In this game club I seem to stick out for not being a geeky stereotype. It may sound arrogant, but of all the people there, I seem to be the only one really making an effort to look decent. There aren't really conventions around here either for the stuff I like, and those aren't exactly regular hang-outs either.

Honestly really, I'm just looking for people like me, not just girls. It's just that, well, I'm a bit lonely and knowing that piece of knowledge above makes me want to look at least a bit. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I look at every girl and judge if she's the perfect soulmate right away, I just want similar minded people to hang out with and who knows, that might increase the chances of finding a girl I have a 'click' with.

TL;DR: I seem to fail at finding folks like me, girls included. I've tried looking for them, but failed. How do I get succes? Living in a rural area doesn't help either I guess.

 

[Snowalker]

Heres the thing, it might help you don't look for someone "like you", but instead find some you like. Theres a difference, people are flexible and ever-changing, so if you find a girl that you like physically, even if you have nothing in common, it might be worth pursuing. Second, get out there, and I'm not saying you're not trying, cause it sounds like you are, but keep trying. The more out and about the more your name gets thrown around, the more people know you, the more interest in you that arises. And remember, don't put yourself in a rut, don't become one person. Do lots of things, try new things, and have fun.

I won't try and be all knowing, this may not work for everyone, or even you, but this seems to be working for me. I haven't got a girl myself, and yeah its depressing at times, but I have friends, of all different kinds, and for the most part I'm happy, and isn't that what matters?

 

[Cowabungaa]

Heres the thing, it might help you don't look for someone "like you", but instead find some you like. Theres a difference, people are flexible and ever-changing, so if you find a girl that you like physically, even if you have nothing in common, it might be worth pursuing.

Heh, no thanks. I'm definitely not one for one-night-stands. I'm not very demanding when it comes to a girl's physique, a metric fuckton of girls I see are physically attractive to me. But I'm looking for something meaningful (do note: I'm avoiding the term "long-term" because that's something you'll only find out during a relationship, I think) and not some silly fling.

Physical attractiveness has it's place, yes, but it's only a small part of liking a girl for me.

Second, get out there

Well, that's just it; I don't know where 'there' is. I've tried a couple of venues where I think I could find girls I'd like, hell where I could find people I'd like, but to no avail. It's funny that you mention friends, because I want more of those as well. I got some, but they all live pretty far away nowadays, can't do much from them, and really I want to get behind this desk more often.

 

[Snowalker]

Heres the thing, it might help you don't look for someone "like you", but instead find some you like. Theres a difference, people are flexible and ever-changing, so if you find a girl that you like physically, even if you have nothing in common, it might be worth pursuing.

Heh, no thanks. I'm definitely not one for one-night-stands. I'm not very demanding when it comes to a girl's physique, a metric fuckton of girls I see are physically attractive to me. But I'm looking for something meaningful (do note: I'm avoiding the term "long-term" because that's something you'll only find out during a relationship, I think) and not some silly fling.

Physical attractiveness has it's place, yes, but it's only a small part of liking a girl for me.

Second, get out there

Well, that's just it; I don't know where 'there' is. I've tried a couple of venues where I think I could find girls I'd like, hell where I could find people I'd like, but to no avail. It's funny that you mention friends, because I want more of those as well. I got some, but they all live pretty far away nowadays, can't do much from them, and really I want to get behind this desk more often.

Did I say one night stand? No. I said pursue. Again, difference. I have a hard time believing you know exactly whats best for you, and if you believe you do, then good luck, cause its going to be hard for a girl to ever measure. And I've noticed your brain is a funny thing, if you like a girl physically, you're often times more inclined to try and relate to them. You may not be shallow, but its just nature. Meaningful come from time, you can't meet a girl and have something meaningful initially, it builds up to that.

Second, there is there. Its not an actual place bud, its an expression. Its the physical movement from your house to outside. I know a guy whose been in a long relationship with his current girl because he started running in the park, and one day she was there with some friends and he asked for her number. Its like that, its random chance, you're damn right girls won't knock at you door, but they will talk to new people.

 

[Cowabungaa]

Did I say one night stand? No. I said pursue. Again, difference. I have a hard time believing you know exactly whats best for you, and if you believe you do, then good luck, cause its going to be hard for a girl to ever measure. And I've noticed your brain is a funny thing, if you like a girl physically, you're often times more inclined to try and relate to them. You may not be shallow, but its just nature. Meaningful come from time, you can't meet a girl and have something meaningful initially, it builds up to that.

True, but then again, I barely actually meet physically attractive girls either. I see them walking around a lot. Like, a lot. I've talked to a few though, mostly work and school related, back when I still went to school. I'll probably do so again when I go back to college this fall.

But I've met enough girls to sort-of know what I like. I just want a girl that looks at my Star Wars Anniversary poster and shelves of videogames and English books (since I'm Dutch but never actually read books written in Dutch) and doesn't think I'm weird, childish or simply lame.

Second, there is there. Its not an actual place bud, its an expression. Its the physical movement from your house to outside. I know a guy whose been in a long relationship with his current girl because he started running in the park, and one day she was there with some friends and he asked for her number. Its like that, its random chance, you're damn right girls won't knock at you door, but they will talk to new people.

Hehe, oh I know what you meant, but what I tried to say is that I don't really know where to go. And that's my goal and the reason I made this topic; to increase that chance, not be reliant on that serendipitous moment that I bump into a girl when I enter the train, and we lock eyes and etc etc. Sure there's a chance of that happening, but I don't want to rely on that chance.

 

[Snowalker]

la snip

Take up Parkour. Or free-running whichever you prefer to call it. its bound to get some people looking your way. Best of all, it doesn't require you to know where to go, because the whole point is that you can do it anywhere. I understand not wanting to rely on that chance, but everyone does, even people who you think don't, they do. Because even if it isn't random, it is. Those people who've been friends forever that slowly devolve into a relationship are rare. And it just like a normal relationship, but mores at stake.

 

[Cowabungaa]

Take up Parkour. Or free-running whichever you prefer to call it. its bound to get some people looking your way. Best of all, it doesn't require you to know where to go, because the whole point is that you can do it anywhere. I understand not wanting to rely on that chance, but everyone does, even people who you think don't, they do. Because even if it isn't random, it is. Those people who've been friends forever that slowly devolve into a relationship are rare. And it just like a normal relationship, but mores at stake.

Ehehehehe...no. Just, no. Knowing my physical capabilities, parkour is not one of them. Ever. Plus, this is where I live:

Great place for parkour...*cough*

Regardless, what it boils down to is that I want a hang-out/meeting place where I'm more likely to find people like me. For having a bigger chance of finding cool girls and cool people in general. Serendipity is too rare for both of them. That's why I made this topic, because I honestly have no idea where the sort of people I like congegrate. I've tried places that seemed likely, but failed. Hence why I'm asking help here.

 

[BDKida]

Social networking is an easy way to meet people. Put up your best picture, start friending friends of friends(shit!) and ones bound to like you. Being attractive helps too.

 

[Snowalker]

Take up Parkour. Or free-running whichever you prefer to call it. its bound to get some people looking your way. Best of all, it doesn't require you to know where to go, because the whole point is that you can do it anywhere. I understand not wanting to rely on that chance, but everyone does, even people who you think don't, they do. Because even if it isn't random, it is. Those people who've been friends forever that slowly devolve into a relationship are rare. And it just like a normal relationship, but mores at stake.

Ehehehehe...no. Just, no. Knowing my physical capabilities, parkour is not one of them. Ever. Plus, this is where I live:

Great place for parkour...*cough*

Regardless, what it boils down to is that I want a hang-out/meeting place where I'm more likely to find people like me. For having a bigger chance of finding cool girls and cool people in general. Serendipity is too rare for both of them. That's why I made this topic, because I honestly have no idea where the sort of people I like congegrate. I've tried places that seemed likely, but failed. Hence why I'm asking help here.

Thats my point though, forget about what you *think* might work, and just do something you think you might not be good at, or haven;t tried before and see where it takes you.

EDIT: you could backflip off that spire, I swear.