Fortunately/Unfortunately

[MasterStratus]

Fortunately, he grew wings and flew by himself.

 

[VoltySquirrel]

I lol'd at how this thread derailed itself over one post.

OT: Unfortunately, the airforce didn't think kindly of it and sent two F16 fighter jets at him to take him down.

 

[Neonbob]

Fortunately, they smashed into each other before they intercepted him.

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Unfortunately, before they did, they both shot all their heatseeking missiles at you.

 

[Neonbob]

Fortunately, since I am a cold, heartless bastard, they cannot lock onto me, and instead head for a preschool.

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Unfortunately, said preschool was actually a school for superheroes, and took the missiles, flew up to you, and made them stick to you, all the while C4 is straped said missiles.

 

[Neonbob]

Fortunately, you were sick of life anyway...

New String!
You were performing in the Big Tent of a circus when the trapeze rope snapped.

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Fortunately, there is a trampoline beneath you and you bounce to safety.

 

[Neonbob]

Unfortunately, you take a weird bounce, and "safety" turns out to be the bleachers.

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Fortunately, the bleachers are filled with the entire race of people made out of tempurpedic beds.

 

[Neonbob]

Unfortunately, you hit the stairs, and only glance off of one of the spectators.

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Fortunately, your insides are actually corn syrup, so you a squishy and flexible, so no harm comes to you.

 

[Neonbob]

Unfortunately, one of the stitches on your body comes loose and corn syrup starts spraying everywhere.

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Fortunately, your doctor is able to give you new corn syrup, fix you up, and make you skin harder, thus making it less likely to be pierced. The bad thing is, you can't use your stretch powers for a week, or you'll die.

[sup]Grats on the Morphex badge bob.[/sup]

 

[Neonbob]

Unfortunately, you have a bad memory.
[sup]Why, thank you! I'm sooooo close to the Neo badge...want...want soo badly [/sup]

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Fortunately, your wife has a tazer and uses it on you whenever you try to stretch. Even in bed. *Wink Wink*

[sup]Neo is my goal. If I can get it, my life will be comeplete. Don't eff your chance up. Only 500 to go for you.[/sup]

 

[Neonbob]

Unfortunately, the tazer ruins your sex life forever.
[sup]I know...I'm trying to keep myself on a lower level now, just so I can avoid moderator wrath...I would hate myself if I messed it up this far in[/sup]

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Fortunately, you doc can fix that too.

 

[Neonbob]

Unfortunately, you have no money for the pills.

 

[VoltySquirrel]

Fortunately, he'll give it to you for a 'special favor'. You also happen to be bi, which is a good thing, considering the favor.