Fortunes.... in bed.

[Johanthemonster666]

I'm sure everyone's done it with a group of friends when they're bored-
Read fortunes from fortune cookies out loud and add "in bed" at the end.

What were some of the best ones-

or (if you haven't done this)

What are some of the worst things to put up on your status or tweet that you can think of?

 

[Avaholic03]

"All your efforts are about to pay off..."

That's about the best one I've got.

 

[strum4h]

"you are about to be reunited with old friends...in bed"
I was confused.

 

[gristledemon]

well xkcd's "Except in Bed" makes any of them more entertaining.
as far as "in bed" goes i would say the old Upright citizens skit, "You are often asked if it is in yet."

 

[Broken Boy]

My brother & his girl do that every time they read one or tack it on after I read one. I find it annoying.

OT: I have never done that but heard plenty of them most memorable was ( You will soon find fortune & fame... In Bed! )

Edit: I assumed it thought I was a porn star.

 

[Yureina]

I remember friends of mine doing that when we are were 13 or 14 in middle school, but i've not seen it since then.

Sorry if that sounds mean. :/

 

[Imp Poster]

"Be a Leader, not a Follower... in bed"

Hey, this fortune comes in spanish too.

"Sea un Lider, no un Seguidor.. en la cama"

 

[SimuLord]

"If in doubt, consult your mother...in bed"

My mom has that fortune (minus the "in bed" part, of course!) tacked on her bulletin board.

 

[Blue_vision]

"... in jail" can lead to some good lols too. Can't think of anything notable at the moment though.

 

[oreopizza47]

You will live a long and prosperous life... in bed.

 

[RebelRising]

"Avoid the opposite sex today...in bed."

"Others will benefit from your wisdom...in bed."

Those two are the best I've ever gotten.

 

[freedomweasel]

Not an 'in bed', but related:

We once opened up a bag of fortune cookies at work, just a small bag you can get at a grocery store, and my girlfriend and boss both got the same fortune:

"a romantic evening awaits you"

The 'in bed' is almost not needed on that one..

 

[crudus]

I prefer to go XKCD's route.

Only promise what you can deliver...except in bed

 

[nuqneh1]

"A nice cake is waiting for you."

I literally spent 10 minutes laughing my ass off because I just finished playing Portal when I ordered the food.

 

[Judgement101]

"Buy more take out...in bed"

Ooookkkkaaaayyyy?

 

[SirDerick]

"You will sleep well tonight"

In bed.

 

[Johnny Reb]

NOTE: i shit you not this was a real fortune i got outta one of those cookies. im just putting "in bed at the end"

Our first and last love...is self love...in bed.