NOTE: Please post in this thread if you PM me your story, that way more people can find out about this 
THIS IS NOW A REQUIREMENT.
Do check back for updated and new games
Hey everybody, for some unknown and still unclear reason, I am doing a Steam game giveaway entirely out of my own pocket! Well, nearly.
Okay, so here's how it works - I give you the game of your choice if you write me in a private message a very short story based around adventure, a sausage and a mushroom. Bonus points if you can shoehorn in a pineapple for a minor role.
(NB- Some games (more expensive, double packs) may require more effort to get. Also please check that you can actually run the games.)
And yeah, you can offer trades but I will do my best to only trade for the good of the giveaway (story still required, just maybe less so)
GAMES:
Fortix x1
Windosill x1
Freedom Fighters x1
BETA KEYS:
Super Monday Night Combat x3 (provided by the rolfwesselius)
No special requirements for this one, only the default.
Remember to add me on steam as Lord Sizzle Montyjing [http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198045848956]
[sub]Also, It'd be awesome if you could donate or give away any games that you might have lying around in this thread.[/sub]
[HEADING=3]After 24 hours if enough people have responded I will then begin giving out the games to the best entries, plus could you post in this thread to keep it going? Thanks xD[/HEADING]
[HEADING=2]Winners![/HEADING]
THIS IS NOW A REQUIREMENT.
Do check back for updated and new games
Hey everybody, for some unknown and still unclear reason, I am doing a Steam game giveaway entirely out of my own pocket! Well, nearly.
Okay, so here's how it works - I give you the game of your choice if you write me in a private message a very short story based around adventure, a sausage and a mushroom. Bonus points if you can shoehorn in a pineapple for a minor role.
(NB- Some games (more expensive, double packs) may require more effort to get. Also please check that you can actually run the games.)
And yeah, you can offer trades but I will do my best to only trade for the good of the giveaway (story still required, just maybe less so)
GAMES:
Fortix x1
Windosill x1
Freedom Fighters x1
BETA KEYS:
Super Monday Night Combat x3 (provided by the rolfwesselius)
No special requirements for this one, only the default.
Remember to add me on steam as Lord Sizzle Montyjing [http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198045848956]
[sub]Also, It'd be awesome if you could donate or give away any games that you might have lying around in this thread.[/sub]
[HEADING=3]After 24 hours if enough people have responded I will then begin giving out the games to the best entries, plus could you post in this thread to keep it going? Thanks xD[/HEADING]
[HEADING=2]Winners![/HEADING]
[user]Hal10k[/user]
Phil the Sausage had led a fairly ordinary life, or as normal as life gets for a sack of animal intestines stuffed with rancid meat. His adventure in making the trip from the meat packing factory to the freezer of a low-rent pizza parlor had been fairly quiet, and he had even made a friend along the way, Steve the Mushroom. The pair quickly grew close, and needless to say were quite please to find out that they were assigned to be placed on the same pizza together, along with Ignatius the Pineapple.
However, their satisfaction quickly turned to despair once they fully grasped the ramifications of being placed on a dish intended for consumption. As the slice they had been placed on was lifted into the gaping maw of an obese man with poor taste in pizza toppings, Ignatius calling all the way that he would have his revenge, they began questioning why they had been subjected to such a fate.
"It's not fair," said Steve the Mushroom, sliding down the lining of the esophagus. "why were we granted intelligence and empathy only to be subjected to this fate?"
"It doesn't even make sense," said Phil the Sausage. "Why would human society willingly consume objects endowed with noticeable characteristics of humanity? Cannibalism is one of the greatest taboos of humanity, so why should it become permissible just because the shape of the sentient being changes?"
"I don't know," said Steve, sliding uncomfortably into the stomach acid.
"And how is this even possible?" railed Phil. "I'm a sack of meat cut from a group of once living animals. Did they form a collective consciousness in the shape of me? That's ridiculous! You're a fungus, too! How are we even communicating without any extrasensory organs?! Why is it that only food is endowed with noticeable consciousness?! NONE OF THIS MAKES SENSE!""Phil, you're scaring me," said Steve, settling uncomfortably into the stomach acid.
But Phil wasn't listening. He had come to an epiphany. Every ridiculous aspect of his short life had led him to the conclusion that his existence was literally impossible. And if Phil was capable of doing the impossible, then he was going to be broken down into nutrients to fuel a fat man's body.
"Phil- where are you going?! Please don't leave me!" said Steve, crying out in the last moments of his brief existence.
But Phil wasn't with Steve. He wasn't in the stomach anymore. He wasn't anywhere anymore.
Phil the Sausage had looked out upon his existence, and realized just how much it could be improved. And now that he had fully manifested, he looked out upon the void, and prepared to enact his plan.
And Phil said, "Let there be light!"
And there was light-
Phil the Sausage had led a fairly ordinary life, or as normal as life gets for a sack of animal intestines stuffed with rancid meat. His adventure in making the trip from the meat packing factory to the freezer of a low-rent pizza parlor had been fairly quiet, and he had even made a friend along the way, Steve the Mushroom. The pair quickly grew close, and needless to say were quite please to find out that they were assigned to be placed on the same pizza together, along with Ignatius the Pineapple.
However, their satisfaction quickly turned to despair once they fully grasped the ramifications of being placed on a dish intended for consumption. As the slice they had been placed on was lifted into the gaping maw of an obese man with poor taste in pizza toppings, Ignatius calling all the way that he would have his revenge, they began questioning why they had been subjected to such a fate.
"It's not fair," said Steve the Mushroom, sliding down the lining of the esophagus. "why were we granted intelligence and empathy only to be subjected to this fate?"
"It doesn't even make sense," said Phil the Sausage. "Why would human society willingly consume objects endowed with noticeable characteristics of humanity? Cannibalism is one of the greatest taboos of humanity, so why should it become permissible just because the shape of the sentient being changes?"
"I don't know," said Steve, sliding uncomfortably into the stomach acid.
"And how is this even possible?" railed Phil. "I'm a sack of meat cut from a group of once living animals. Did they form a collective consciousness in the shape of me? That's ridiculous! You're a fungus, too! How are we even communicating without any extrasensory organs?! Why is it that only food is endowed with noticeable consciousness?! NONE OF THIS MAKES SENSE!""Phil, you're scaring me," said Steve, settling uncomfortably into the stomach acid.
But Phil wasn't listening. He had come to an epiphany. Every ridiculous aspect of his short life had led him to the conclusion that his existence was literally impossible. And if Phil was capable of doing the impossible, then he was going to be broken down into nutrients to fuel a fat man's body.
"Phil- where are you going?! Please don't leave me!" said Steve, crying out in the last moments of his brief existence.
But Phil wasn't with Steve. He wasn't in the stomach anymore. He wasn't anywhere anymore.
Phil the Sausage had looked out upon his existence, and realized just how much it could be improved. And now that he had fully manifested, he looked out upon the void, and prepared to enact his plan.
And Phil said, "Let there be light!"
And there was light-
[user]Wintercoat[/user]
Sir Sausage, our noble, handsome hero, stumbled upon a cave one evening while out hunting gerbils.
"'Tis the hideout of the nefarious Mushroom Gang!" Shouted Sir Sausage, no doubt alerting the inhabitants immediately of his presence.
Upon entering the cave, Sir Sausage was immediately hit in the head by a large rock.
"Tonight we eat sausage stew!" was the last thing our hero heard before blacking out completely.
-an unquantifiable amount of time later(maybe 5 minutes, give or take)-
"Uhhh...my head...da fuck did I drink last night..." Sir Sausage moaned as he regained consciousness. Being the stalwart epitome of manliness that he is, Sir Sausage shook off his stupor, immediately realizing what must have happened.
"Caught me by surprise, did you? Well, noone pulls a fast one on ole Sausage!" Excreating a thick oily fluid from his casing, the venerable Sausage slips free from the ropes that were binding his arms.
"Those mushrooms will pay for this slight!" He bellowed, and was again immediately hit in the head by a hard object. "Haha! That trick won't work a second time!" Sir Sausage cried. He swung about, whipping his fist into the cap of the Mushroom Bandit who had dared to smash a hard object into his head. The fiend crumpled under the massive blow, dead in an instant.
Just then, the room filled with the entire Mushroom Gang.
"By the Gods, it's like a sea of penises..." Sir Sausage gasped. "Well, this won't be the first time ole Sausage had to spend the night whacking phalluses!"
And so he went to work, beating those mushroom caps until they exploded in a shower of sticky spray.
The cave cleared, Sir Sausage left, spent and satisfied at a job well done.
Sir Sausage, our noble, handsome hero, stumbled upon a cave one evening while out hunting gerbils.
"'Tis the hideout of the nefarious Mushroom Gang!" Shouted Sir Sausage, no doubt alerting the inhabitants immediately of his presence.
Upon entering the cave, Sir Sausage was immediately hit in the head by a large rock.
"Tonight we eat sausage stew!" was the last thing our hero heard before blacking out completely.
-an unquantifiable amount of time later(maybe 5 minutes, give or take)-
"Uhhh...my head...da fuck did I drink last night..." Sir Sausage moaned as he regained consciousness. Being the stalwart epitome of manliness that he is, Sir Sausage shook off his stupor, immediately realizing what must have happened.
"Caught me by surprise, did you? Well, noone pulls a fast one on ole Sausage!" Excreating a thick oily fluid from his casing, the venerable Sausage slips free from the ropes that were binding his arms.
"Those mushrooms will pay for this slight!" He bellowed, and was again immediately hit in the head by a hard object. "Haha! That trick won't work a second time!" Sir Sausage cried. He swung about, whipping his fist into the cap of the Mushroom Bandit who had dared to smash a hard object into his head. The fiend crumpled under the massive blow, dead in an instant.
Just then, the room filled with the entire Mushroom Gang.
"By the Gods, it's like a sea of penises..." Sir Sausage gasped. "Well, this won't be the first time ole Sausage had to spend the night whacking phalluses!"
And so he went to work, beating those mushroom caps until they exploded in a shower of sticky spray.
The cave cleared, Sir Sausage left, spent and satisfied at a job well done.
[user]Davatehi[/user]
Time was running out. The end was drawing near. Up in the sky a flaming rock was closing in threatening to destroy all that is good. Saussy the sausage and Mushy the mushroom had been selected to venture to the edge of the world to find the only thing that could stop this burning rock, the secret pineapple of Uhluhtc. Only with its power could the world be saved.
They had been walking for days, dodging foul beasts of the night as well as swamps, desserts and other horrifying things. It's like the world wanted them to die. But they couldn't stop, they wouldn't stop... As they finally approached the temple of the sacred object they noticed how it looked... ruined. "Let's hope we are not too late." said Mushy. They hurried to the chamber where the sacred pineapple resided. What they found brought great sorrow to their very soul. The sacred pineapple... had rotten.
As the minutes ticked down before it all would end Saussy looked over at Mushy. "You know, with someone like you by my side I don't think I mind dying." Mushy laughed. "We had a good run. I'll wait for you in the afterlife. Our stories will not be forgotten". Mushy and Saussy embarrassed each other and then everything turned re...
"STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR FOOD!" Lord Cthulu sighed. Once again his mother had stopped him from bringing doom and destruction to the dinner table. But when he grew up he would show them. He would show them all sorrow and despair. But now it was time for dessert.
//THE END
He also drew a picture to accompany the story [http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b329/Xalip/story.jpg]
Time was running out. The end was drawing near. Up in the sky a flaming rock was closing in threatening to destroy all that is good. Saussy the sausage and Mushy the mushroom had been selected to venture to the edge of the world to find the only thing that could stop this burning rock, the secret pineapple of Uhluhtc. Only with its power could the world be saved.
They had been walking for days, dodging foul beasts of the night as well as swamps, desserts and other horrifying things. It's like the world wanted them to die. But they couldn't stop, they wouldn't stop... As they finally approached the temple of the sacred object they noticed how it looked... ruined. "Let's hope we are not too late." said Mushy. They hurried to the chamber where the sacred pineapple resided. What they found brought great sorrow to their very soul. The sacred pineapple... had rotten.
As the minutes ticked down before it all would end Saussy looked over at Mushy. "You know, with someone like you by my side I don't think I mind dying." Mushy laughed. "We had a good run. I'll wait for you in the afterlife. Our stories will not be forgotten". Mushy and Saussy embarrassed each other and then everything turned re...
"STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR FOOD!" Lord Cthulu sighed. Once again his mother had stopped him from bringing doom and destruction to the dinner table. But when he grew up he would show them. He would show them all sorrow and despair. But now it was time for dessert.
//THE END
He also drew a picture to accompany the story
[http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b329/Xalip/story.jpg]
