Ye gads, man. Why not spray yourself with woman repellent and wear a T-shirt with "I'm Gay" emblazoned across it, if you're so hell-bent on self-sabotage?zelda2fanboy said:
Others have already mentioned this, but I'll say it again: your personal statement is very, very bad. At every opportunity you're being self-deprecating and selling yourself short. I get it; you're trying to prove that you're non-threatening and not an arrogant jackass and overall a "nice guy". In reality though it just makes you sound insecure, and like you're seeking sympathy rather than admiration. The only type of woman who I can imagine responding to your profile is one who is either blown away by your physical appearance, or a dominatrix, or a girl who is on the rebound and wants a nice sexless relationship with a doormat for a few months until she's ready to play with bad boys again[footnote]If I sound bitter it's because I've been there...[/footnote].
If this sounds negative it's because there's a lot of things wrong with your profile. I'll get onto some positive advice in due course, I promise.
1 - Cut it down. It's too long. I got bored reading it; I suspect girls would too.
2 - A good start would be to nix all the negative bits. Tell us you're a graduate. Don't tell us what you earn. Tell us what you enjoy, not what you don't enjoy or aren't good at.
3 - Make yourself come across as interesting. You don't consider youself interesting? Then become interesting. Nobody, least of all attractive women, are impressed by how many hours a day you spend watching films, playing Wii or levelling up your WoW accounts. Simple rule of thumb: make efforts to become the kind of guy you would admire platonically.
4 - Wii Fit is for housewives. Join a gym and lift free weights, don't use machines.
5 - Your photos sound horrific too. Awkward family pictures? "Zany" pieces of candy? A disclaimer that you're a gigantic prude with no confidence? You'd be better with no pictures at all. Let me guess, in the pictures are you making intentionally awkward or ironic faces, probably not making eye contact with the camera, as if to say "Lol I hate photos, that's how un-egotistical I am, oh no they're taking another one now, lol". Delete all those. Dress nicely, brush your hair and teeth, don't squeeze your zits, make sure the lighting is good (set the white balance if taking a photo indoors) and pose for a nice portrait picture. Look at the camera. Smile warmly and genuinely. Keep your hands by your sides. No ironic frowning or face-hiding or bloody duckface. Also, don't have a group photo as your only (or best) profile pic; your friends might be better looking than you and you don't need competition.
6 - Everybody listens to music, ony a jackass defines themselves by their musical tastes.
7 - Sod it, just go out and meet people in real life. This dating site is intended to bring people together in face-to-face situations anyway, so cut out the middle man. Get out more. Join some clubs and societies. Go to more social events with your work colleagues. Meet more of your friends' friends. Did Romeo and Juliet meet over the internet? They didn't need it and neither do you. Get out there and get some. That's an order.
[edit] You sound like a nice guy, but if you think depression is a problem, it's almost certainly more important for you to sort that out and be happy internally before you start adding external complications (i.e., women) into the mix. You mentioned changing your brain chemistry: good idea, exercise is superb at getting those endorphins flowing. Join a gym, start some martial arts, learn ballroom dancing, whatever. Many of these forms of exercise are also a great way of meeting women on a regular basis.
