Fuck beef jerky

[Chknboy]

When I was a kid I used to use beef jerky as currency when trading snacks with other kids at lunch time....I thought it was interesting that you prefer salty snacks but didn't enjoy jerky, it's basically salty cured/dried/smoked beef.

 

[Gabanuka]

You're clearly never had Deer Jerky. That shit's divine.

My friend once hyped up this Sacndiwegian thing called "Plopp". I wasn't very nice

Edit: Just Googled it. It's Swedish

 

[Evil Smurf]

root beer is ginger beer right?

 

[Ickorus]

Pocky.

I know people who treat it like it's ambrosia but to be honest it's overpriced and thoroughly average.

By the way, I love beef jerky, I just never get it because it costs an arm and your firstborn son where I live.

 

[BaronUberstein]

Beef jerky is great! But hey, if you're not going to eat it, more for me.

 

[Decessa]

Jerky from a good butcher shop is amazing. I despised jerky up until I worked at this butcher shop in southern Kansas. 5 time Grand Champion at the Kansas Meat Packers Association Product Show. I wouldn't of even tried it if I didn't get it free, and even then it took me a few weeks before I did.

A low-quality specimen (read: any mass-produced brand) definitely deserves to be flat out refused...if not burned in an incinerator...and that goes double for the flavored varieties.

 

[Mouse_Crouse]

root beer is ginger beer right?

I believe we call Ginger Beer "Ginger Ale". Root Beer is usually vanilla and sassafras flavored.

Having said that, even as an American I agree with the TC, beef jerky is terrible.

 

[AmrasCalmacil]

My personal one is PopTarts. Weird and crumbly and overly sweet.

I tried Beef Jerky about a year ago and really liked it, I'd like to have it in actual long strips sometime, as I always thought that was how its meant to be.

 

[Syzygy23]

Beef Jerky isn't hard to make, it's not an import.

Is too.
No company in Norway that I know of makes beef jerky. The only places I've ever seen beef jerky for sale is in stores that specialize in importing stuff.

Also brand name store bought beef jerky is typically of very low quality. When people drool over beef jerky, they're typically thinking of something you would find at a good butcher shop, or otherwise home made.

First of all, I know of at least one incident where I know the beef jerky being praised was bought from a regular grocery store.

Secondly, I refuse to believe that there is such a large gap between good quality and poor quality jerky that I - who is no connoiseur by any stretch - will flat out spit out and refuse to eat a low quality specimen, but still love the taste of a high quality one. That's not how food works.
A low quality sample of a tasty food will taste merely 'meh' unless there is something wrong with it, like, it's way past the expiration date or something.
If the low quality sample's taste can be described as 'ew, disgusting', the high quality sample is going to be 'meh' at best.

Just put strips of beef in a dehydrator and let it sit overnight. BAM! Beef Jerky.

Now you want something delicious?

Fried.
Octopus.
Tentacles.

It's the DOPEST shit ever invented. It's like... Sorta like mixing calamari, except less rubbery, with a french fry and an onion ring with a little bit of steamed oyster.

Speaking of which, you should eat steamed clams. With butter sauce. Damn it, now I'm hungry.

 

[DeltaEdge]

I'm rather surprised at the amount of discussion this is getting lol. Anyways, I used to really like beef jerky back in the 3rd and 4th grade, when I was 9 and 10, but now, it's just alright. I don't hate it, but I don't love it either. I'll eat it, and maybe enjoy it a little bit, but that's about all. And as for root beer, bleugh! That stuff is not very good at all imo. The only drinks I dislike more than root beer are any kind of flavored soda other than lemon lime flavor, i.e., cherry, grape, and orange soda. And at the top of the list of drinks that I most hate is Dr. Pepper. UGH. It tastes like someone took maple syrup, mixed it with cough syrup, then added some hand sanitizer, dirt, and some vanilla and club soda, then mixed it with a dirty wooden chopstick. then got Bear Gryliss to leak his acidic, dehydrated urine into it (There may be a bit of hyperbole in this statement). Dr. Pepper is the worst! Please don't beat me up.

 

[MammothBlade]

You're right, beef jerky tastes as bad as it looks. I'd rather feast on human pancreas saute. (in fact it's much preferred.)

 

[NiPah]

Yeah, that would be alcohol, tried it a few times and never went back.
Never really appealed to me either, the better it is the faster you forget it.

 

[Surpheal]

Taco Bell's Doritos taco

I really don't care about the fact that you put cheese dust on a taco shell, I just don't. If I wanted to eat what is extensively cheese, lettuce, Dog food meat, and Doritos, I would stay home.

Seriously, go fuck yourselves.

 

[neoontime]

I hate Beef Jerky.
Teriyaki Jerky is where it's at. It's the savory snack of GODS!

 

[Bogwhiskers]

Original flavour usually tastes like wee for any brand. Teriyaki is an entirely luck-based flavour, too... Sometimes it tastes like more wee, and sometimes it tastes nice and sweet. Try peppered! Or just a handful of black table pepper and chew on some leather or something.

Even with my favourite brands, bags can vary. Pieces within the bags can vary. Some will crumble on your tongue, some require a chainsaw to break apart. Personally, I find Jack Link's to be the easiest to tear apart, or at least second place to Oh Boy! Oberto. Tillamook is tasteless to me. Once in a while I see a strange lesser-known brand and give it a try, but it's usually thin and bland and much too hard to eat. At least Jack Link's is affordable. Living in a "foreign" US territory, we get not only get jerky imported at highish prices, but it's mostly marketed to rip off Japanese tourists as well.

Now a real snack is proper Old Dutch ketchup chips. Or dill pickle!

But I liked Pepsi Blue, so what do I know.

Actually, what's really good is Melona bars. http://melona.com.ar/images/387.jpg

I can't think of anything I don't really like that hasn't been mentioned before. Pocky and Ribs, mostly. I'm not that adventurous after all...

 

[Aerosteam]

Wait... joking?!

Yep. I liked ME3.
For me, only the ending was shit.

I shall counter this by saying I was joking.

>.>

<.<

[sub][sub][sub][sub][sub][sub][sub]Maybe I won't look like an idiot now.[/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub]

 

[Phlakes]

I know, right? I used to be in Boy Scouts and there was fucking jerky everywhere, you couldn't take a step without having a bag thrown at you, sometimes we even survived long hikes on just jerky, and it was fucking disgusting. It's like solidified meaty vomit. And I never want to touch it again.

 

[Sean951]

I love jerky, but Jack Links is pretty much the worst I've had. Jerky is supposed to be chewy, salty, and occasionally spicy. Jack Links had a flavor that eludes my vocabulary with a texture akin to a poorly cooked steak that wants to fall apart.

 

[geK0]

Pocky seems to be pretty damn over-rated weeabu food : \ I don't mind the stuff, but I don't understand why some people go so crazy over it.....oh right, it's from Japan.