Funniest/Coolest thing an enemy has shouted at you in a game.

[The_Deleted]

Bulletsorm ahas a few belters but:

"I will kill your dick!"

"...what does that even mean?!"

Is on that stuck in my head.

 

[Knusper]

Spy from TF2: "You're precious sandwich won't save you now, fatty."

Also, the other day I was replaying Half Life 2 Episode 1 and in the safehouse, if you go upstairs and then back down again through the corridor pas the room filled with zombies, you can overhear 2 refugees talking - they keep saying all these random lines and I can swear one of them was "[while sobbing] Sometimes...I dream of cheese"

 

[Aidan Goldthorpe]

Halo 2, fighting grunts, one says 'you killed my brother! I kill you!;

 

[Ubermetalhed]

The various splicers in the Bioshock games have some of the best, if not the best, enemy chatter I've every seen... um, heard.

Much prefer the more terrifying cries of the enemies from System Shock 2.

Mutated hybrid humans running at you screaming 'Run away' and 'I'm sorry' beat out the splicers easily.

Nah.

The System Shock monsters had a few really good lines (We are, we are, we are), but they were few and far between. Besides, not even all those distortion effects could cover up the lacklustre voice acting.

The splicers had distinct personalities (doctor, posh lady, aspiring actress, bereaved mother, breadwinner etc) and variety. Their dialogue ran the whole gamut from pathos to horror to comedy.

Well I'm going to have to agree to disagree on this one.

I never once felt scared by Bioshock's splicers or even apprehensive in encountering them like the enemies in SS2. I also have to disagree with the voice acting, it was extremely good for the time and I'd say still holds up.

The splicers seemed really dull to me and underdeveloped. The doctor and the other nutters didn't have any realistic or natural development in them becoming insane. Even the audio diaries were relatively poor, I mean remember the audiologs from SS2 like the ones detailing the birth of the cyborg midwives, it's pretty haunting stuff, it made the encounters with them even more disturbing.

Bioshock is a virtual rip of SS2, having played Bioshock after I had played SS probably influences me more on why I prefer the many over the splicers but it could also be the fact that the splicers themselves just don't look scary and the world of Bioshock had little atmosphere. I guess the look has to be there for the dialogue to really work for me.

 

[Shadowfaze]

Manhunt- "I know you're here, i can smell the filthy mess in in your pants!" and another from Manhunt- "I'm gonna get me a pile of pasta so high when this shit is done."

 

[DanielBrown]

The Dunlendings in LOTRO often shout things like "You can't kill me, ", so when I'm killing them on my Man character it sounds like they're a bunch of hippies.
Always cracks me up a bit.

I won't fall to you, man!

 

[gmaverick019_v1legacy]

ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL.

everytime i hear it i usually get a grin on my face...

 

[ProtoChimp]

Any of the stupid shouts from the human enemies in Mass Effect and the hilarious shouts from No More Heroes "MY SPLEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIN"

 

[ChupathingyX]

It's also the only strategy game I know of that your units can get pissed off at you XD

"You click me one more time and I will fucking smoke you!" (American Rifleman)

"I think I hear your mom calling for ya." (Sherman tank)

"How 'bout you go back to the main menu and try the tutorial, no?" (German Soldier)

And Finally my personal favorite:

"Gunner! Point the turret to that floating camera in the Sky!" (British Tank)

In Dawn of War (and expansions) some of the units also talk directly to you, such as the Orks and Daemon Prince, but nowhere near as 4th wall breaking as the CoH units.

 

[veloper]

"I will bury you in a lunchbox!!"
Rise of the Triad was crazy good fun shooter. A low budget game that was so bad, it became good again.

 

[kayisking]

It has to be Leon's victory taunt from Dead or Alive 4:

"Come back once you've wiped your ass!"

WTF does that mean?

It means that he has beaten you so bad that you have shit yourself.

 

[Torrasque]

I loved putricide in wow
Aggro:
Good news, everyone! I think I perfected a plague that will destroy all life on Azeroth!
Airlock:
You can't come in here all dirty like that! You need that nasty flesh scrubbed off first!
Phase Change on Heroic Difficulty:
Two oozes, one room! So many delightful possibilities...
Transform:
Hmm. I don't feel a thing. Whaa...? Where'd those come from?
Tastes like... Cherry! Oh! Excuse me!
Killing a player:
Hmm... Interesting...
That was unexpected!
Berserk:
Great news, everyone!
Death:
Bad news, everyone! I don't think I'm going to make it.

IN THE MOUNTAINS!

Funniest thing: Squirrel in Conker's Bad Fur Day - "I'LL CUT YOU SONS OF BITCHES IN HALF!"
Coolest thing: I stuck an elite general in Halo Reach, right when he was shouting something, and his dialogue glitched into the "OH NO!" in mid sentence, so it somehow sounded like "FUCK MY TITS". I laughed so hard, because it was so silly in his voice, and because the Elite proceeded to slice up the other 2 guys playing Firefight with me xD

 

[RemuValtrez]

Was Playing Magicka facing an orc boss.

Once you kill him he says:

Ack! Loss of blood! My Only weakness!

Love that game!

 

[Black Arrow Officer]

In Splinter Cell Conviction, a gangster yelled this at me in a museum-turned-headquarters for bad guy:

"You here for the tour, Fisher? Step out, and I'll slash your throat like Marat!"

 

[AppleShrapnel]

Bandit from Fable 2:

"When I'm through killin' you, you'll wish you were dead!"


Sacred 2 has some gems, but I can't quote anything word-for-word this very second. >.>

 

[Peter Richmond]

Two games: The chatter from enemies in Far Cry 2, like when they know you just wiped out their whole patrol and are shitting their pants, they will usually start yelling and freaking out, which ramped up the tension immensely.

And also, as someone else said, Company of Heroes has the best unit responses and statements in a game. EVER. Just to name a few:

"Ha! They are scratching your paint job Halmut!" (German Tiger being attacked by Sherman)

"Who believes in the Boogeyman?" (American Sniper)

"Our Veterans? Six years of war. Their veterans? Six days of war." (German Tank)

"Were Airborne! Were meant to be surrounded!" (U.S. Paratrooper)

It's also the only strategy game I know of that your units can get pissed off at you XD

"You click me one more time and I will fucking smoke you!" (American Rifleman)

"I think I hear your mom calling for ya." (Sherman tank)

"How 'bout you go back to the main menu and try the tutorial, no?" (German Soldier)

And Finally my personal favorite:

"Gunner! Point the turret to that floating camera in the Sky!" (British Tank)

Warcraft 2 was first with that. All blizzard RTSes have it.

my faves is:

"Help help im being repressed."
-peon wc2

"My life for Aiur... er? I? I mean Ner'Zhul"
-Acolyte wc3

"Me eat dead people"
-Ghoul wc3

"(raving) I hate you, I hate you! (calmly) Call me."
-Banshee Wc3

(phone rings) "Yes? Argh, for the last time. I'm a DREADlord, not a DRUGlord"
-Druglord Wc3

"Darkness called? But I was on the phone, so I missed him. I tried to *69-Darkness, but his machine picked up. I yelled "Pick up the phone, Darkness!," but he ignored me. Darkness must have been screening his calls."

-Daemon hunter Wc3

(phone rings) "Yes? Darkness, hey, what's up? The Demon Hunter left you a message? No I don't have his number."

-Dreadlord Wc3

"Who is this 'darkness' anyway?"
-Arthas Wc3 (undead)

"I see? absolutely nothing."
-Illidan Wc3 (note:he's blind...)

"I'll attract the enemy with my human call: 'I'm so wasted! I'm so wasted!'"
-Dryad Wc3

"hear my warcry! moo..."
Tauren Wc3

(Wow that game has many good quotes...)

 

[TheMadDoctorsCat]

The various splicers in the Bioshock games have some of the best, if not the best, enemy chatter I've every seen... um, heard.

Much prefer the more terrifying cries of the enemies from System Shock 2.

Mutated hybrid humans running at you screaming 'Run away' and 'I'm sorry' beat out the splicers easily.

Nah.

The System Shock monsters had a few really good lines (We are, we are, we are), but they were few and far between. Besides, not even all those distortion effects could cover up the lacklustre voice acting.

The splicers had distinct personalities (doctor, posh lady, aspiring actress, bereaved mother, breadwinner etc) and variety. Their dialogue ran the whole gamut from pathos to horror to comedy.

Well I'm going to have to agree to disagree on this one.

I never once felt scared by Bioshock's splicers or even apprehensive in encountering them like the enemies in SS2. I also have to disagree with the voice acting, it was extremely good for the time and I'd say still holds up.

The splicers seemed really dull to me and underdeveloped. The doctor and the other nutters didn't have any realistic or natural development in them becoming insane. Even the audio diaries were relatively poor, I mean remember the audiologs from SS2 like the ones detailing the birth of the cyborg midwives, it's pretty haunting stuff, it made the encounters with them even more disturbing.

Bioshock is a virtual rip of SS2, having played Bioshock after I had played SS probably influences me more on why I prefer the many over the splicers but it could also be the fact that the splicers themselves just don't look scary and the world of Bioshock had little atmosphere. I guess the look has to be there for the dialogue to really work for me.

SS2 is undoubtedly the better game, and 100% is the scarier game (seriously, it has some of the best sound-design ever) but I gotta say BOTH games are fantastic when it comes to enemy voices. Not sure either game's enemies qualify as "funny" though. To be creeping around the radioactive tunnels in the maintenance level of System Shock 2 and then suddenly have a hybrid scream "KILL MEEEE!" about six inches from your ear... not funny. Unless you consider it a hilarious experience to cr-p your pants and scream like a six-year-old girl...

As for "Bioshock", the splicers voiced by Juliet Landau (Drusilla from "Angel" and "Buffy", no less) creep me the hell out, as does the guy (can't remember who voices him) who sings: "Jesus loves me, this I know. For the bible tells me so." Yeah, it's not as scary, but it sure as hell is effective.

Actually Juliet Landau MIGHT get into the "funny enemy" category for "Come here you horrible little monster!" It's her delivery of the line that makes it work so well... she plays it completely "straight".

 

[TheMadDoctorsCat]

Two games: The chatter from enemies in Far Cry 2, like when they know you just wiped out their whole patrol and are shitting their pants, they will usually start yelling and freaking out, which ramped up the tension immensely.

And also, as someone else said, Company of Heroes has the best unit responses and statements in a game. EVER. Just to name a few:

"Ha! They are scratching your paint job Halmut!" (German Tiger being attacked by Sherman)

"Who believes in the Boogeyman?" (American Sniper)

"Our Veterans? Six years of war. Their veterans? Six days of war." (German Tank)

"Were Airborne! Were meant to be surrounded!" (U.S. Paratrooper)

It's also the only strategy game I know of that your units can get pissed off at you XD

"You click me one more time and I will fucking smoke you!" (American Rifleman)

"I think I hear your mom calling for ya." (Sherman tank)

"How 'bout you go back to the main menu and try the tutorial, no?" (German Soldier)

And Finally my personal favorite:

"Gunner! Point the turret to that floating camera in the Sky!" (British Tank)

Warcraft 2 was first with that. All blizzard RTSes have it.

my faves is:

"Help help im being repressed."
-peon wc2

"My life for Aiur... er? I? I mean Ner'Zhul"
-Acolyte wc3

"Me eat dead people"
-Ghoul wc3

"(raving) I hate you, I hate you! (calmly) Call me."
-Banshee Wc3

(phone rings) "Yes? Argh, for the last time. I'm a DREADlord, not a DRUGlord"
-Druglord Wc3

"Darkness called? But I was on the phone, so I missed him. I tried to *69-Darkness, but his machine picked up. I yelled "Pick up the phone, Darkness!," but he ignored me. Darkness must have been screening his calls."

-Daemon hunter Wc3

(phone rings) "Yes? Darkness, hey, what's up? The Demon Hunter left you a message? No I don't have his number."

-Dreadlord Wc3

"Who is this 'darkness' anyway?"
-Arthas Wc3 (undead)

"I see? absolutely nothing."
-Illidan Wc3 (note:he's blind...)

"I'll attract the enemy with my human call: 'I'm so wasted! I'm so wasted!'"
-Dryad Wc3

"hear my warcry! moo..."
Tauren Wc3

(Wow that game has many good quotes...)

Actually the original Warcraft had my fave of the lot: click on the grunt enough, and he screams: "STOP POKING MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!" Again, it's all in the delivery.

The "Tides of Darkness" expansion pack had Terron Gorefiend, undoubtedly the funniest death knight in parts 1-3 of the Warcraft saga. Click on HIM enough and you get: "Stop that infernal clicking!" and then "This is why I ended it all."