Game characters with stupid names

[WickedSkin]

Master Chief. It's just terrible. Also Solid Snake. But I guess they are code names.

EDIT
I learned here that "Master Chief" is his rank and his name is John Forge. Both are still terrible. But someone mentioned Marcus Phoenix so you can scratch Master Chief and Solid Snake and replace them with just Marcus Phoenix.

Can't believe I didn't remember that name. I think I might have suppressed that memory.

 

[IAmWright777]

Master Chief is a pretty stupid name, but don't tell the fanboys or anyone with a passion for military ranks.

I have a personal dislike of Three-Dog from Fallout 3. He doesn't seem to have any connection to a dog, let alone three of them. Unless his name is really an answer to 'how many penises do you have?'.

his name is john btw so yeah...

True Master Chief's real name is John, but you can only know that through reading the extra books. Because I don't think the games even hint at his name. Also, his rank.... that's a non-combat rank I believe. So overall kind of a dumb name (and yes I play Halo, and yes I can list major issues with the game. Go me for not being a rabid fanboy!!)

OT: Anyways, I agree with Nexus: Three-Dog is a terrible name haha. Though, I didn't care for Three Dog, all he ever did was annoy me.

in game cortana calls him john. it was either 1 or 3.

Wait really? haha I missed that, so I guess now I will just have to replay all the Halo games to find it. Probably the 3rd though, it referenced the books more than it referenced the previous Halo games. I thank you Ph33nix, you have just given me something constructive to do.

 

[whycantibelinus]

Sgt. Johnson.

You might as well just call him Sgt. Dick.

 

[Above]

Navi in zelda,its a bit odd it tells you what to do but mostly where to go like a sat NAV(i).

 

[Ph33nix]

Master Chief is a pretty stupid name, but don't tell the fanboys or anyone with a passion for military ranks.

I have a personal dislike of Three-Dog from Fallout 3. He doesn't seem to have any connection to a dog, let alone three of them. Unless his name is really an answer to 'how many penises do you have?'.

his name is john btw so yeah...

True Master Chief's real name is John, but you can only know that through reading the extra books. Because I don't think the games even hint at his name. Also, his rank.... that's a non-combat rank I believe. So overall kind of a dumb name (and yes I play Halo, and yes I can list major issues with the game. Go me for not being a rabid fanboy!!)

OT: Anyways, I agree with Nexus: Three-Dog is a terrible name haha. Though, I didn't care for Three Dog, all he ever did was annoy me.

in game cortana calls him john. it was either 1 or 3.

Wait really? haha I missed that, so I guess now I will just have to replay all the Halo games to find it. Probably the 3rd though, it referenced the books more than it referenced the previous Halo games. I thank you Ph33nix, you have just given me something constructive to do.

I think it was only on legendary and I'm not 100% sure. more like 75% sure. i could be easily confusing this with one of the books but i was sure see said something like "take care john" or something.

 

[Mysterious Stranger]

Nathan Zachary from Crimson Skies: HRtR. Or anyone else with a double first name, for that matter.

 

[IAmWright777]

Master Chief is a pretty stupid name, but don't tell the fanboys or anyone with a passion for military ranks.

I have a personal dislike of Three-Dog from Fallout 3. He doesn't seem to have any connection to a dog, let alone three of them. Unless his name is really an answer to 'how many penises do you have?'.

his name is john btw so yeah...

True Master Chief's real name is John, but you can only know that through reading the extra books. Because I don't think the games even hint at his name. Also, his rank.... that's a non-combat rank I believe. So overall kind of a dumb name (and yes I play Halo, and yes I can list major issues with the game. Go me for not being a rabid fanboy!!)

OT: Anyways, I agree with Nexus: Three-Dog is a terrible name haha. Though, I didn't care for Three Dog, all he ever did was annoy me.

in game cortana calls him john. it was either 1 or 3.

Wait really? haha I missed that, so I guess now I will just have to replay all the Halo games to find it. Probably the 3rd though, it referenced the books more than it referenced the previous Halo games. I thank you Ph33nix, you have just given me something constructive to do.

I think it was only on legendary and I'm not 100% sure. more like 75% sure. i could be easily confusing this with one of the books but i was sure see said something like "take care john" or something.

Well I will look, but I guess I have to wait until I replace my 360.... it redlighted....

Nathan Zachary from Crimson Skies: HRtR. Or anyone else with a double first name, for that matter.

Ha I couldn't agree more. Completely ruined the movie Talladega Nights for me.

 

[Redingold]

The Boss

her name is The Boss she doesn't haveany other name
The Cobra unit also suffers from the same thing and also Big Boss

Solid/Liquid and Solidus snake

They do have real names, you just aren't told them. Big Boss' real name was John. Snake was named "David". Why would an elite special ops team use their real names, anyway?

Also, George Sears.

I thought Big Boss's real name was Jack?

Solid Snake doesn't have a real name and if he did it wasn't truly his because he's just a copy of their father Big Boss.

No, Big Boss' real name was John. They called him Jack, but his name was John. And, if you've played MGS4, you should know that EVA refers to Snake as David. Same at the end of MGS1, when he tells Otacon or Meryl his real name.

http://metalgear.wikia.com/wiki/Solid_Snake

http://metalgear.wikia.com/wiki/Big_boss

 

[justhereforthemoney]

Boyd Travers from MOH: Airborne. I mean honestly, how much more American can you get?

How is Boyd Travers American? If by "American" you mean "stupid" (made up and such), then I'll agree with you, but other than that I've never heard the name Boyd or Travers and I'm American.

 

[Therumancer]

Well, I think the record could be shared evenly between characters with over the top "kewl" sounding names from failed franchises. Sort of like how Game Informer once went off on a character literally named "Will Rock". Then I believe they had some things to say about the male lead in "Bullet Witch" who was called "Max Cougar" or something along those lines.

The followups could probably be any culture that tries to make a cool sounding name of someone from another culture and fails utterly. The Japanese are the kings of this while trying to imitate Americans, the whole "Big In Japan" thing of them aping badly. While America has had failures in the opposite direction, there is a very old joke about Weeaboos/Wapanese that Americans can do Japan, but Japan can't do America. The old thing showing a bunch of basement dwellers trying to act/look Japanese, and then showing some Japanese "hipsters" trying to act Americans side by side as pictures and amazingly how close it can come... It's dated though, vintage humor from anti-weeaboo anime/game snobs.

Still I wouldn't be surprised if some purely American/Western made Ninja game got ported to Japan, had moderate success, and "WTF" names when someone threw stuff together that threw vaguely oriental.

As far as Rocketbilly Redcadillac goes, well... that's Japan. I would be surprised if somewhere is a silent Japanese lurker going "what's wrong with that name"? Honestly though consider that I watched the entire run of "Magic Knight Rayearth" and in the second season it involved characters from a world where everyone was apparently named after cars. Indeed "Eagle Vision" was a big part of the climax, though noone can ever forget his right hand man "Geo Metro".

 

[Upturned Walrus]

I think that whole cast of all the Final Fantasy's has friggen daft names oh god one pop's to mind Wind ha ha lol

 

[Sleipnir]

Wait a minute... how the hell did we get through this entire thread without anyone mentioning Tingle?

I have no idea but that made me laugh so hard.

Beat, Gum, Corn, Yoyo, Combo, Rhyth, Garam, Boogie, Jazz, Soda, Cube, Clutch etc etc. The soundtrack from JSRF traumatised me after a while, especially cause this one song that I loathed kept playing on this "bossfight" thing I was stuck on for about 3 weeks... UGH...

Most of the characters from the final fantasy series has ridiculous names, except the rare few (like Zack, Vincent and Irvine, which reminds me of bovine for some reason).

And finally, at risk of revealing how truly pathetic a man I am, Goopy Gilscarbo from The Sims 2... And any other "randomly generated" NPC/Townie... The Sims team still haven't learnt their naming lesson, as a townie on TS3 spawned a child called Siddhartha Smith...

 

[Kwaren]

this is the worst name

Spoiler

 

[Trivun]

Any of the Cids from Final Fantasy. The name is just so generic and silly. But admitedly, in every FF game I've played or want to play (so, anyof FF7, FF10, FFX-2, FFXII, and The Spirits Within film), the Cids have all been extra cool. So I guess the silliness of the name is made up for by the ubercoolness of the characters themselves.

 

[Trivun]

Master Chief. It's just terrible. Also Solid Snake. But I guess they are code names.

EDIT
I learned here that "Master Chief" is his rank and his name is John Forge. Both are still terrible. But someone mentioned Marcus Phoenix so you can scratch Master Chief and Solid Snake and replace them with just Marcus Phoenix.

Can't believe I didn't remember that name. I think I might have suppressed that memory.

Wrong. Master Chief's real name is indeed John. But his surname is unknown. John Forge is a completely different character in Halo Wars and fights alongside Spartans, but is merely a Marine Sergeant. John Forge =/= Master Chief.