Gaming Cardinal Sins

[tippy2k2]

So....we meet again!...wait...wrong greeting (or is it??? Dun Dun Duuuun!!!!)

Anyway, I am playing what is turning into a much better game than I had anticpated in Metal Gear Rising Revengeance (or Super Happy Cyborg Ninja GO! Team as I like to call it).

It has been ever so much fun so far. However...there is a mild thing that is greatly greatly greatly annoying and breaks a cardinal sin of gaming. Then I realized that the Cardinal Sins of Gaming do not actually exist yet. Therefore, we shall write them! Come my children, we must spread the word!

Game: Metal Gear Rising Revengeance
Cardinal Sin: Though shalt not make your block button the same as your attack button

Holy balls is this annoying. In order to attack bad guys, you press the X button to light slash. In order to block something, you wait until it shows an attack is incoming, then you press towards your enemy and click X. If Kojima gives his blessing, you block. If not, you slash at the enemy before getting *****-slapped by whatever attack you wanted to block.

TLDR (or got bored with my schtick?); What should be the Cardinal Sins of Gaming that all games should not have? Ideally, include a game for an example.

Now go forth my children and spread the Gospel!

 

[Elfgore]

Thou shalt not have thy sprint and cover button be the same!

Seriously, fuck games that do this. Only a few can actually pull it off without me screaming in rage.

 

[Racecarlock]

Thou shalt not make me clean toilets.

Mafia II, go fuck yourself.

And don't anybody tell me that "Oh the story was good". I played the thing. The plot was ripped from GTA III and GTA IV at the same time and the characters were all ripped from the big book of mafia movie cliches and the gameplay was either generic better than usual cover shooting or slowly driving across town or boring chores or shitty stealth sections.

Assassin's creed IV, you're awesome. But I'd like more steal ships as a pirate missions and less slowly following dudes around while avoiding 97 guards who happen to be in the same area.

 

[BraveSirRobin]

Thou shalt not have unskippable cutscenes, especially not before a boss battle!

This was basically the entire reason I could never get into Kingdom Hearts.

 

[gmaverick019_v1legacy]

Thou shalt not have thy sprint and cover button be the same!

Seriously, fuck games that do this. Only a few can actually pull it off without me screaming in rage.

oh god this, especially if you're sprinting towards cover, and you end up doing a fucking somersault and not sticking to the cover so you get blasted in the face. whoever thought this was remotely okay needs to get cuntpunted out of the office.

Thou shalt not have unskippable cutscenes, especially not before a boss battle!

This was basically the entire reason I could never get into Kingdom Hearts.

god damn this also, suchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh a pain having to rewatch a 2+ minute cutscene from dying, or if you've seen the damn thing 100 times and just want to zoom past the cutscene.

OT: Suppose I should add my own even though two awesome ones have been made already.

Thou shallt make anything the computer can do, you can do as well

(this gets extremely frustrating in games that involve combos, or "rubberbanding" where the computer comes back like it's the hulk while you are barely holding on.)

most recently this happened playing on immortal on Civ V, I ended up spawning right by elizabeth, and no matter HOW I played my initial turn out, her scout would beat mine to the 3 ruins by us every time. (they were all in a row on the way to the last one, so there was no way I could beat her to the next ones), and if I had a fucking nickel for how many spies I had stealing my tech...I'd be able to just buy my way to a diplomatic victory. Frustrating as hell when my defensive spies and defensive buildings aren't doing jackshit to keep the slight edge I have over the computer.

 

[Bofus Teefus]

Thou shalt not use pressure on the thumb-sticks for disruptive functions!

While I've played a game recently where this was a nuisance, the game that comes to mind is Transformers: Fall of Cybertron. On PS3, L3 causes you to transform. If you're a spaz like me, and press a bit harder on the thumb-sticks while maneuvering in intense situations, then you will, like me, transform into a toaster or whatever rather than continue to aim and shoot.

Hell, I'll go for two.

Thou shalt not put quicktime events in cutscenes!

Think practically any Resident Evil since RE4. I like to watch cutscenes. If I'm not mistaken, that is what they're there for- to be watched. I don't want to have to watch wherever the QTE field might happen to avoid getting shanked by Krauser.

 

[Prime_Hunter_H01]

Game: Metal Gear Rising Revengeance
Cardinal Sin: Though shalt not make your block button the same as your attack button

Not a sin. You actually get a pretty big window to parry and even a failed parry is still a block just without the counter in fact parrying early is a better strategy as your window is huge so an early parry which becomes a block will still reflect all damage, so while it is still good to learn the perfect parry which gives you the powerful counter attack its better to do it early rather than wait till you think you can get a perfect one. And I have had success with this on both PS3 and PC and have heard few complaints about the system.

OT: Pauseable as well as skippable cutscenes.
Life happens and takes priority over games, but I still want to watch the cutscenes the first time through or if I like it on subsequent times through. And would prefer not to have to skip that cutscene just to pause or if it is neither pauseable or skippable wait for it to pause or miss it just from run time if i need to leave the game.

 

[tippy2k2]

Game: Metal Gear Rising Revengeance
Cardinal Sin: Though shalt not make your block button the same as your attack button

Not a sin. You actually get a pretty big window to parry and even a failed parry is still a block just without the counter in fact parrying early is a better strategy as your window is huge so an early parry which becomes a block will still reflect all damage, so while it is still good to learn the perfect parry which gives you the powerful counter attack its better to do it early rather than wait till you think you can get a perfect one. And I have had success with this on both PS3 and PC and have heard few complaints about the system.

It is an easy system to use. It is also a very reliable system that works 92% of the time. However, it's still a system that shouldn't be in there. The 8% of the time when it does not work can cost you. I've never been flat-out killed by a failed block but you lose points for it (damn you S rating!!!!) and it's put me in some sticky situations where I went from "a little bit of health" to "getting sneezed on is going to kill you cyborg".

I am still loving this game though (Super Happy Cyborg Ninja GO! Team is going to be one of my go-to games when people complain that there's no original ideas in gaming); I can hate the sin without hating the sinner.

 

[AmberSword]

I'm overwhelmed with thought right now, so I'll only post the most immediate ones that come to mind.

"Thou shalt not implement stick wiggling QTE's"

SERIOUSLY! Any other form of QTE is ok, stick wiggling or rotating? No.. Please, it hurts.

"Thou shalt not create moves that require more than one directional input in quick succession"

This one is harder to explain, basically, if anyone remembers DMC4, that game had moves for Nero called Cardinal or Roulette if I'm not mistaken, that required you to nudge forward, then immediately nudge backwards followed by the sword button to execute, and the nudging wasn't up or down either, it was context sensitive based on which direction you were facing at the time, it got REALLLY annoying, MGR seemed completely harmless in comparison. Then we get the new DMC where using the most basic of moves, the Stinger, requires you to nudge forward 2 times... my god did I hate it. Only in fighting games will I accept this, because those are alien to me anyway.

 

[Vivi22]

Thou shalt not put quicktime events in cutscenes!

Think practically any Resident Evil since RE4. I like to watch cutscenes. If I'm not mistaken, that is what they're there for- to be watched. I don't want to have to watch wherever the QTE field might happen to avoid getting shanked by Krauser.

To add to this: Thou shalt not change the button in the QTE after the player fails it

I remember RE4 doing this frequently, and it's just dickish and an automatic second failure for anyone not expecting it.

 

[Vivi22]

Game: Metal Gear Rising Revengeance
Cardinal Sin: Though shalt not make your block button the same as your attack button

Not a sin. You actually get a pretty big window to parry and even a failed parry is still a block just without the counter in fact parrying early is a better strategy as your window is huge so an early parry which becomes a block will still reflect all damage, so while it is still good to learn the perfect parry which gives you the powerful counter attack its better to do it early rather than wait till you think you can get a perfect one. And I have had success with this on both PS3 and PC and have heard few complaints about the system.

Holy run on sentence Batman!

And compensating for something being awful by making it really easy to do and still blocking even if you fail doesn't mean it isn't a sin. It means they recognized there was a problem but instead of actually fixing it they just polished that turd to a mirror shine. Which actually makes it even worse in my eyes.

 

[AntiChri5]

"Thou shalt not restrict the player to a single, constantly overwriting, autosave"

Well hey there, Assassins Creed series and Fable 3 and oh so fucking many others. Did you know that that is the most painfully obnoxious save system known to man? You didn't? WELL IT FUCKING IS. Want to replay a certain part? Too bad. Fuck up before it saved? Too bad. Hit a glitch? Too bad.

We are long past the point where giving the player control over saves is standard.

 

[lachlan4567]

"Thou shalt not restrict the player to a single, constantly overwriting, autosave"

Well hey there, Assassins Creed series and Fable 3 and oh so fucking many others. Did you know that that is the most painfully obnoxious save system known to man? You didn't? WELL IT FUCKING IS. Want to replay a certain part? Too bad. Fuck up before it saved? Too bad. Hit a glitch? Too bad.

We are long past the point where giving the player control over saves is standard.

Here here, I'd also like to add, if thou are using a auto saving feature beta test the game and make multiple saves like skyrim.
Child of light crashed while autosaving just after beating it. Managed to save my previous save from 5 hours ago from the auto cloud upload.

 

[Grouchy Imp_v1legacy]

Thou shalt not have thy sprint and cover button be the same!

Seriously, fuck games that do this. Only a few can actually pull it off without me screaming in rage.

Binding any other functions to the sprint button is definitely a sin. I've lost count of the times I've been fleeing the cops in recent GTA games only to be gunned down as my character goes from flat out pelt to casual saunter to answer a sodding phonecall.

 

[Gamer87]

I've got one more generally about gamers behavior.

Thou shalt not defile another's controller/mouse and keyboard with sticky fingers.


It really bothers me when you have guests over and are eating something while watching somebody play a console game and then it becomes the turn of the one who is eating to play and they don't bother to even wipe their hands off on a napkin. Nobody wants grease on their controller. Or am I just being fussy about this?

Just saying washing your hands should be a common courtesy and not something I should have to tell people to do like some cranky old lady.

 

[moosemaimer]

Making frequent actions context-sensitive.

Oh, you wanted to jump up onto that box, just like you did the one right next to it? Well, we didn't feel like putting a trigger on that object, so you can go screw. You want to lean out and shoot at people while simultaneously not getting turned into a colander? That random object you're hiding behind doesn't count as "cover," so no, you can't.

 

[XDSkyFreak]

Thou shalt not add split second timing actions in thy game unless said game can read split second button pushes.

Risen 2 comes to mind first here ... my god the parry-counter system sucked ass. So in theory it's simple: you hold block, press attack when the enemy attacks to parry and when you parry you press jump to execute the counter.

In practice: 20% the game doesn't read your input. 50% of the time you attack the enemy as he attacks and then get slapped over the head. 29% of the time you do parry but the counter doesn't register. 1% of the time you actualy parry-counter the enemy. And I'm the guy who can pull off some of the most complicated and crazy piano style moves in fighters. Just don't bother. A single button press is enugh, and even then make sure your fucking game reads input correctly.

 

[Treeberry]

Thou shalt not have unskippable, obtrusive tutorials.

Harvest Moon: A New Beginning decided to teach such obscure concepts as how to move the player character - after you would already have moved the character anyway. The whole tutorial process (which really lasts for the entire first season interspersed with a bit of gameplay) is unnecessarily drawn out.