Give some advice to customers

[Mossberg Shotty]

Have we worked together? Cause I have the exact same issue at my store. These jamacian ladies come in acting like they're king shit, bringing their hellspawn who destroy everything. Abuse the coupons like it's nobodys buisness and just downright take stuff from other peoples carts.

When did a customers rights trump basic human rights?

I wish I knew. And saddest of all, that's not the worst example. Once, I had these two Jamaican ladies (while we're on the subject) that came in and just started picking everything off the racks that they could get their hands on. Women's clothes, men's clothes, didn't matter, just whatever was in arm's reach. And then they would throw the hangers straight onto the ground.

When I politely asked them to stop, they acted like they didn't know what I was talking about... and then kept fucking doing it. Took me forever to pick all of them up. They stole the clothes, as I later came to find out. Had our LP guy mad as hell.

Customers are terrible.

 

[OpticalJunction]

please don't explain why you're buying something, I honestly don't care.

 

[thesilentman]

Dear would be consumer,

Learn to Google. In some cases, Google will solve 99% of your problems. Note the wording as when you come to me, half the fucking problems you come to me for can easily be fixed that way.

Oh, and please don't insult me. I may just snap and format your computer or do some other thing as my revenge, such as activate Group Policy and lock you out of your own computer. I do my best to explain, so excuse me if I'm pissed that you are rude and disrespectful.

Sincerely from a disgruntled computer fixer,
Silent

 

[Heronblade]

My field is engineering, but this one would apply to any kind of commissioned work, from art to architecture.

Be clear about what you want right from the beginning. The longer you wait to clarify what you actually meant, the more of our time and resources gets wasted. Our worst customers in this respect tend to be our own management, we can't give them the metaphorical finger and market the product to someone else when they keep jerking us around.

 

[LordBongo]

I work in graphic design, and there's ONE thing that 99% of clients don't do which really prevents them from getting their money's worth. Here's the secret:

Do NOT tell us what you want. Tell us what you want to ACCOMPLISH.

For example, instead of saying "I want a logo with a car crashing into the letters but the guy inside is happy and waving" (which is a piss-poor idea) say something like "I want to convey a message of safety and security with this logo." Us designers are trained to think critically & creatively, and to communicate effectively in a visual way. We didn't spend our 3+ years in school just learning how to Photoshop things.

 

[Laughing Man]

Wow so many I could return from work everyday with a new list of annoying things customers do.

1). Receipt, we give you one for a reason, if you come in looking for a pre ordered or repaired product and we gave you a receipt then make my job easier and your trip quicker by coming back in with the receipt. You give me that I scan it go get your product it takes 30 seconds, you come in act like I've called you a troll faced shoe licker because I asked if you had a receipt and I then have to go and search our computer data base then it takes five minutes and theirs a bloody good chance you aren't leaving with what you cam in for.

2). You asked me for advice and I gave you it, so why are you standing there questioning it, better yet why have you walked off and asked another collegue who has given you the same answer.

3). Ignorance is never an excuse, we live in an age were an answer to pretty much any question can be found in thirty seconds using Google, and better yet it will have more input from a wider number of people, coming in to store and saying I am looking to buy a product but I literally know nothing about it means nothing to me it also tells me that you don't care what I recommend since you couldn't even be bothered to do even the slightest bit of research prior to coming in.

4). Don't like the price then fuck off, it's a free market economy no one forced you to come in and buy from us, if you saw it cheaper somewhere else then well fucking done go buy it from there, telling me about it, especially the infamous 'I saw it online at this price' will get a big so fucking what from me.

5). Parents with kids, just because you are in the store doesn't mean we take on the role of part time baby sitter for your inbred off spring. 'The man will get you in trouble' is not an excuse, it's your fucking child take some god damn responsibility for them and keep them the fuck under control.

6). Coming in to store and saying 'I saw this product online' is all very well and good, coming in to store with a vague description of the product and the price you THOUGHT you saw it on the website does not help me at all. The name, product code and the ability to print the page are all there and will allow us to find the product in a matter of seconds. A description of it's colour, the function you think it has and 'erm it was about £40 on the website' doesn't help me at all.

7). You came in looking for a specific product for your car, looking at me when I ask what kind of car you drive or the number plate is just inexcusable, the fact you are allowed to drive yet don't know what kind of car you drive or the god damn number plate, no sorry get the fuck out my face now.

 

[Elfgore]

I work in a garden center and since my usual customers are old ladies, I don't have that much advice but I have a few.

1. Yes we sell broken bags of stuff for half off, be thankful. Now if the tag that has the mark down price is missing and it is an expensive item please have some patience for a manager to come out and allow it. It is impossible for me to do it so don't get angry at me, you're paying 25 for something that is usually 50 so wait.

2. If you show up at eight to get into the garden center in the morning to bad, it will not be open. I need a manager to come and disarm the alarm on the doors. I'm stuck in here with you too so suck it up and wait, glaring at me like I'm satan will not speed them up.

3. If you are foreign and have a heavy accent, I am hard of hearing and I may need you to repeat what you said twice or even three times before I can understand you. And don't try to whisper under your breathe that I'm an idiot, I know the word for idiot in indian, spanish, german, french, russian, and japanese so I know what you just said.

 

[6_Qubed]

Hello customers! I deliver pizzas.

I make all of my money from deliveries. If you are ordering dine-in or carry-out, I hate you. Nothing personal, it's just business you miserable prick.

When I'm not delivering pizzas (which is most of the time) I am washing dishes. Please don't jam a bunch of trash down into your half-full cups before you leave, because I am trying to keep trash from clogging up the sink and YOU AREN'T HELPING.

(location specific) We do not take hundred dollar bills. We have a sign on the door, and a sign right by the cash register. They are bright orange and there's no way you could've missed them. This isn't up for negotiation. WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TRYING TO PAY WITH A HUNDRED.

Figure out what you want to order before you dial the damn phone. It's bad enough I'm not making any money off your carry-out-ordering cheap ass, but now I gotta sit through ten minutes of "umms" and "uhhs" while you figure out what you should've known by now? Man fuck you.

I am not a manager. I do not know when our specials end. The office tells me nothing. Don't be mad because I'm just as surprised as you.

Again, I am not a manager, and I do not control the prices. No, I will not give you a discount just because you asked nicely. No, saying "come on man" will not change my mind. You ordered carry-out so you wouldn't have to pay the delivery fee, and I hate you, remember?

When your broke ass finally orders delivery, please have your payment ready when I get to your door.

If you payed by credit card, I need to see your card. I told you that when you placed the order.

No, a computer print out is not the same thing as a credit card. It's two pages and in black and white, what the hell is wrong with you.

No, the delivery charge is not a tip.

Yes, tipping is optional. But not tipping is just plain rude. Don't act like you couldn't afford two fucking dollars to say "thank you", because I took your order and I know those hot wings were extra.

Who the fuck even orders wings from a pizza place. Go to KFC or Popeyes or something goddamn.

Yes, I know that the other place does things differently. That's why they are the other place. You did not call the other place, you called us. REMEMBER THAT.

My car has no AC and it's fucking hot outside. Believe me when I say I'm getting your order to you as fast as possible.

And finally, as it has been stated many times, don't let the uniform fool you. I am not, in fact a clever simulacrum but a living human being. And if you had to deal with as many assholes as I did, you'd be in a bad mood too.

captcha: do you like mashed potatoes?

Why yes, actually, with butter, salt, pepper.

 

[michael87cn]

As a cart pusher for a grocery store:

1. Please don't tell me to not hit your car as I walk by to clean up the carts near where you're parked. I'm there to HELP prevent that kind of thing, not cause it. Yes, I know cars are expensive. However if you lazy slobs would put them away in the designated areas 10 FEET from your car instead of around it, in front of it, behind it, etc.. this wouldn't be a problem, would it? (I've done this crappy job for 5 years now, never once came close to hitting a vehicle with a cart).

2. Please don't push carts as hard as you can at the store to prevent crossing the street. They just bounce off the wall and half of the time end up in the middle of the road. I then have to stop what I'm doing and go collect them to prevent a traffic accident, because yes, people will drive right into a shopping cart going 5 MPH...

3. If I'm collecting carts in your area, I know you're there. I've seen you sitting in your car procrastinating leaving for the past 5 minutes, please don't immediately start your engine and start backing out the second you see me passing behind you with a train of 25+ carts, I know, you don't want me to block you but I won't. One of my main responsibilities is to give customers the right of way, even though I am a pedestrian.

4. Please don't 'hang out' in the parking lot, it looks bad.

5. Please don't ask me where things inside the store are, you probably know better than I do. I spend 99.9% of my days outside and don't have to even go through the store to clock in.

6. The earpiece in my ear is a headphone, not a microphone. No, I can't call a manager but I can go and personally get one, though it would be much better for you to just go inside yourself and talk to them there.

7. Yes we have a cart machine, if you see me pushing a train by hand its because another worker is using our only working one.

8. Please refrain from revving your engines in the parking lot, you're not impressing anyone revving your SUV.

9. Please don't park your vehicle on, at, or around the cart bays. That's where we put carts. Yes, you should even not park your motorcycle there... (we often have 3+ cars hovering around our cart bays, because they don't want to have to look for a parking spot and are waiting on a spouse to finish shopping). Also refrain from parking in the FIRE LANES please. It's my job to tell you to move your vehicle and its just as uncomfortable for me as it is for you.

10. Please actually let people cross the street and stop speeding down a pedestrian crossing. It really does NOT take that long to get through.

11. When you collect a cart inside the store, please don't pull so hard that 3+ come apart, when enough customers do this the entrance looks like shit. Also, when leaving its great that you are carrying your goods by hand and leaving the cart behind, but please push it into place instead of turning it around backwards and facing right into the other carts. I have to just go and put it on for you and it ends up wasting my time instead of saving it like you intended.

12. If I'm pushing a train of carts and I'm going to be coming in your way, drive that vehicle. Make your turn. Drive around me while you can. Don't hesitate and wait till the last minute and then almost drive right into me. Either learn to drive or have patience. It takes about 15 seconds for me to get the train out of your way.

13. I could go on all day but I'll stop here: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, HAVE PATIENCE! I get paid shit to do an extremely exhausting job. I bake in the sun all day (103 yesterday, fun stuff!) and I'm here to clean up your messes. Next time you're going shopping you should say something nice to a cart pusher. We're hard working people and even our co-workers think bad of us. It's a simple job but it couldn't be harder work for the pay. It would be nice if people would look at me nicely instead of giving me a gaze like I'm some kind of pedophile.

edit: thought of one more D: please don't leave disgusting shit in carts. There are garbage cans everywhere.

 

[lord.jeff]

I work in the meat department at a grocery store

1. Start with a greeting and ask for service nicely, example:

BAD: Ribeye, make sure it's nice!
or even just point and saying "that one" happens a lot.

GOOD: Hello, I would like a ribeye steak.

2. Don't talk on your phone and to me at the same time.

3. I don't set prices so don't be angry at me if you think something is to much.

4. Any big orders try to call a few days in advice, most of the we can fill a 30+ order on the spot but it means we can't serve other customers later do to low stock.

5. Watch your kids, I have to throw out meat if they decide to poke holes in the packaging with their dirty fingers.