God damnit, I just messed up, didn't I?

[Drakmorg]

Every single day I think something along the line of "I fucked that up didn't I?"
I honestly can't recall what most of the situations were because they are so damn numerous.
Fortunately my life is small and pathetic enough that none of these fuck-up moments ever actually have any real effect on anyone or anything else.

 

[Wintermute_]

I bumped into a woman in a store.
I wasn't paying attention and said "Oh, sorry sir."
That ended with me trying to say sorry, but how do you apologize for that? "You look like a man."

I would have said that I only saw her out of the corner of my eye. Most people are understanding about that.

OT: I've been doing extremely poorly in French this year, with the majority of my quizzes and tests being 70% or below.

Ah French... I'm in an advanced education course called IB (International Baccalaureate) which is a step ahead of AP even. Its a great program and graduating from it is great on any college app, but this year my french grades are so bad (I'm working to bring it up to a C dammit...) that I could be pulled, even with great grades in all my other classes.

Seriously, as a U.S. citizen, I will speak French how often? When I'm conversing with all those French immigrants that just crossed the border? Fuck french (no offense to france, I just don't wanna learn your language)

OT: Every time I take or get a French test back, "God dammit, I just dicked this up royal," followed by a torrent of profanity passes through my mind.

 

[TilMorrow]

Whenever I have a choice in video games.

I think I'll just follow this gu- Ah God Dammit he turned out to be the bad guy. *reloads save from ages ago*

 

[mik1]

I'm currently in highschool and this story took place in highschool. At the time I took my grades way to seriously and was getting stressed about this really hard class everyone struggled in. I heard as Freshman it's a good kick in the pants to get you ready for the rest of highschool. Thats a huge understatement. Anyway the 2nd semester of that class just started and I wanted to get a B+ or better in that class because i barely got a B- last semester.

So first assignment comes along and it is a take home test. Everyone loves this because it's a chance to get an easy 100% on something thats weighted as a test. I do it and check all my answers confident they are all correct. The day it is due we check them in class. Were going through the answers and she finishes up what I have written down and keeps going. I was about to vomit I felt so sick because stupid ass me looks around and see's it was on multiple pages. I wanted to cry but there was nothing I could do that first moment when my mind clicked and said you dumb fuck you forget the other page. And i did come back with a decent grade i think because I actually studied like a ***** for the other tests.

 

[aquailiz]

20 minutes ago actually. I was about to post a topic but you ninja'd me. anyway playing minecraft everything going great. i just built a signal tower, i have a bunch of iron ore and i just found some more. "But the dwarves dug to deeply to greedily." Suddenly sand piles on top of me. i lost;

iron chestplate
iron sword
3 sting
5 flint
20 torches
30 coal
pick
shovel
20 iron ore

Yeah it's just iron stuff but i just started and 20 ore pieces man!

lol

 

[Tsunimo]

I was playing QWOP.

I hate you for reminding me of that game...
I'm going to go spend the next 5 hours attempting to run now...

 

[AceAngel]

When my body hurts, I sing...I kinda has a sore bum due to stress and lack of proper fibers followed by hard foods, so it kinda hurts.

Whenever I get a spike of pain, I start singing my sentences in a soprano style voice. So basically, if I'm mid sentence like this:

"So I had to tell them that IIII AAM GOOOING TO CHANGE MAAY SCHEEEEDULE!!!!"

Naturally, my friends know about this issue, and find it funny and aren't bothered by it, but whenever where at lunch or something, and something happens to cause me pain, this ensues.

No need to know what happens after.

 

[Bender Rodriguez]

Just chill buddy, its not the end of the world is it?

You wouldn't have someone that shallow would you?
(If she ended up ignoring you for that small problem)

 

[Eternal Cat]

Ah French... I'm in an advanced education course called IB (International Baccalaureate) which is a step ahead of AP even. Its a great program and graduating from it is great on any college app, but this year my french grades are so bad (I'm working to bring it up to a C dammit...) that I could be pulled, even with great grades in all my other classes.

IB's done jack-all for me over here, it's way harder but less accepted than the (worthless) national standard.

OT: Man, I feel sorry for all you guys (and myself, although I can't bring a specific instance to mind). Just read this with the Dead Island trailer music playing, and you will shit brix. It's been in my head for a few hours now.

 

[sniddy_v1legacy]

There's an older lady in a wheelchair in my building that often needs to have the door held open for her when she takes her dog for a walk. The other day I opened the door for her and we chatted, and once she had her dogs leash clipped she wheeled out. As she left I said to her, "Goodbye, have a nice walk"

Actually, you may be surprised how they take that.

To you it may sound slightly insensitive, but maybe to them it may be nice you haven't raised the issue or reworded it to make it more 'PC'

I worked with a blind man for nearly a year, and he never took offense if I didn't take into account his 'lack of sight'...TBH the best thing you can do for anyone in that kinda situation is treat them the same as everyone else, as far as you can, and if they take offense at that....well then the problem is with them becuase ultimately I'd imagine most people in that kinda situation are sick too death of people treating them oh so differently and carefully walking on eggshells just becuase of whatever.

And if you want a real 'god damn it I messed up moment'...burn you girlfriend's denim jacket with her recently departed nans watch in the pocket...yeh.

 

[WrongSprite]

There's an older lady in a wheelchair in my building that often needs to have the door held open for her when she takes her dog for a walk. The other day I opened the door for her and we chatted, and once she had her dogs leash clipped she wheeled out. As she left I said to her, "Goodbye, have a nice walk"

Ha, I've got a similar one. I know this girl at uni, who was fairly drunk, so I decided to wave my hand in front of her face to see if she followed it with her eyes. You know, standard drunk test.

Turns out she's half blind. Man, that's awkward.

 

[Mr.Pandah]

EDIT: Not looking for advice by the way! Just asking for other funny stories.

I think it would have turned out better if you had put on some pants dammit!

I think you may be panicking. Give it a day or two then try again. You may hear from her again before then and if you don't, you kind of figure that you missed your chance but if you try again the worst she can say is no.

Fake Edit: Giving advice anyway, remember secretive me, I don't share stories. Silly Pandah.

Listen...my lack of pants is what sealed the deal on acquiring said number

My girlfriend told me she loved me for the first time and I said "Awww thanks, I love me too" long story short, we are no longer together.

rofl I remember the first time that was said between me and my first girlfriend...I just said "Bye." and booked it out of there. I eventually ended up saying it, but that got me caught up in a 3 year relationship/waste of time because she ended up cheating on me! So much for I love you.

stuff

Yeah I can imagine that would be a little awkward, you seem like a really confident and knows-how-to-act kind of person though so she'll still probably like you.

...Really? Is that sarcasm? haha I wasn't aware I gave off that kind of vibe. Thank you though!

We've all done it before...We we're feeling on top of our game, and then for WHATEVER REASON, shit just hit the god damn fan.

Mine just happened yesterday. I smooth talked a girl into giving me her number the day prior, a rather cute girl to be honest, someone I definitely am attracted to. A great turn of events for an overall great night.

So, yesterday(which would be the next day on my timeline), I gave her a call in the evening. She didn't pick up, so I left a message asking if she'd be down for getting some coffee or a bite to eat. One minute afterwards, my father calls up and asks how everything is going, but I hear someone trying to beep in. I finish up my conversation with my father shortly after, and see her number as the missed call. Now, I was worried that I didn't hear her number properly, so I just decided to call back and made a little joke about playing phone tag (she didn't pick up, this was a voicemail), and then she didn't call back for another half hour or so. So, I texted the number to make sure it was actually the right one and she responded and we spoke for a bit and she said she'd talk to me later. Now, a whole day passes and still no contact.

I'm a sad panda because I feel like I came off really desperate and just blah.

So what are your stories of that horrible feeling of "MAN, I JUST FUCKED THAT UP, DIDN'T I?!"

EDIT: Not looking for advice by the way! Just asking for other funny stories.

It's funny because you spelt dammit [http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/dammit] wrong. But seriously, I don't fcuk things u- Shit.

Haha I don't know why I spell it like that, I've always done it and have never been corrected on it before...weird.

I failed badly with a guy I fell pretty hard for. This is primarily because I can't read body language to save my own life.

The first was, what I have come to know as, the old 'my hands are cold' trick. I genuinely thought his hands were cold. They were, obviously, not, so I let them go. This act alone earned me a smack to the back of the head.

The second was when - while drunk - I kissed my fingers and pressed them to his forehead, which he reacted to by touching his forehead and bringing his hands to his heart. Again, let that slip.

Then we get to us both sprawled in the hallway, watching The Beards on Youtube, with his arm around my waist and a leg each entangled. Again, missed that (I KNOW! I KNOW!).

Then the piece de resistance. When I bought him junk food, he says "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach". My insane response? My COMPLETELY mad, delusional response? "Actually, if you have a sharp enough scalpel, you could probably cut open the chest, prise open the rib cage and get in that way."

Yeah. I suck at dealing with boys.

Now THAT sounds like a lot of herp derp. haha Wow, smoooooth. Sorry =P