Got quite a few questions escapists.

[Sandernista]

So, I'm incredibly depressed. I was seeing a therapist over the summer but I wasn't really getting anything from it. Are there any places online that could help me find a more effective one? Or, are there any better methods of finding one?

Now this one goes hand in hand with the one above. My girlfriend is an incredibly happy person, but having to deal with me has dampened her spirit considerably. How do I help keep her happy with out lying about me? Or would it be better to lie?

Moving on, still semi-related. I entered a new school this semester. I got early admission to a very small college on the other side of my very large Midwestern city. As I can't afford living on campus I commute every morning. It's about a hour and ten, to 1.75 hour commute by train. (This large Midwestern city has very good public transportation.) While I have a presence in class, I have made no friends. To add insult to injury, I have lost all my old friends aside from the aforementioned girlfriend. How can I go about making friends with down at my college when I have to commute home every night?

Wooh. More relationshit. There is a class mate who I have a total crush on, I'm fairly certain it is entirely because she is 'new and exciting'. How do I get over the crush? (I really don't want to do anything with new-girl, I'm in a very good relationship, and I am very 'happy' with it.)

If any more information would help in giving me advice with any of these scenarios I will be glad to provide you with it. (To an extent)

Thanks in advance.

 

[Batou667]

So, I'm incredibly depressed. I was seeing a therapist over the summer but I wasn't really getting anything from it. Are there any places online that could help me find a more effective one? Or, are there any better methods of finding one?

Pardon my bluntness but from the rest of your post, I don't believe you have anything more than very mild depression. Somebody who is "incredibly depressed" wouldn't be capable of holding down a girlfriend and be able to attend college. Sure, you might be feeling confused or generally down, but that's not the same as depression. How to feel better? I'll say the same thing I always say: stay active, exercise every day, keep your friends and family close but don't drag them down. Stay positive and remember feeling positive or negative comes from within.

How can I go about making friends with down at my college when I have to commute home every night?

There must be activities or clubs, either before or after school or during lunch break, that you can join in. Staying an hour after college would still let you commute back in good time, right?

Wooh. More relationshit. There is a class mate who I have a total crush on, I'm fairly certain it is entirely because she is 'new and exciting'. How do I get over the crush? (I really don't want to do anything with new-girl, I'm in a very good relationship, and I am very 'happy' with it.)

I think you answered your own question. You have a crush on her because she's new and interesting and in your mind you're building her up to be more than she is. Either just try your best to ignore her, or to take the quickest route, get to know her. She'll soon stop being a mystical sexy goddess and start being human in your eyes. Don't be tempted to cheat on your girlfriend, you'll regret it.

 

[Sandernista]

So, I'm incredibly depressed. I was seeing a therapist over the summer but I wasn't really getting anything from it. Are there any places online that could help me find a more effective one? Or, are there any better methods of finding one?

Pardon my bluntness but from the rest of your post, I don't believe you have anything more than very mild depression. Somebody who is "incredibly depressed" wouldn't be capable of holding down a girlfriend and be able to attend college. Sure, you might be feeling confused or generally down, but that's not the same as depression. How to feel better? I'll say the same thing I always say: stay active, exercise every day, keep your friends and family close but don't drag them down. Stay positive and remember feeling positive or negative comes from within.

How about I redefine myself as being depressed enough where it negatively effects my daily life. I have barely been in school as I cannot muster the motivation to get out the door most days, and when I do I hardly contribute in class and cannot get motivated to finish work for class. I can't even muster the motivation to see my girlfriend on a regular basis[footnote]She will take the initiative and come and see me, it helps that we've been together for a few years[/footnote], something that should be easy to be excited about. I have little to no appetite at any time, which is probably just making my general health worse; this coupled with my general lack of sleep is just contributing to my inability to preform in class.

How can I go about making friends with down at my college when I have to commute home every night?

There must be activities or clubs, either before or after school or during lunch break, that you can join in. Staying an hour after college would still let you commute back in good time, right?

Because my school is so small[footnote]There are 110 students in the weekday program, 30 in my year.[/footnote] there are very few clubs, but I am trying to stay for the few that are there. It just seems like I'm an outsider most of the time.

snip

I think you answered your own question. You have a crush on her because she's new and interesting and in your mind you're building her up to be more than she is. Either just try your best to ignore her, or to take the quickest route, get to know her. She'll soon stop being a mystical sexy goddess and start being human in your eyes. Don't be tempted to cheat on your girlfriend, you'll regret it.

Yeah I know, I think this one was really just me venting.

Thank you for replying.

 

[Galletea]

1. Your girlfriend probably just wants to help you get better. Don't worry about dampening her spirits too much, talk things through with her, make sure she knows that you appreciate her, and you're sorry she has to deal with it. Most importantly make sure she knows how much you want to get better, perhaps she can help you look for another therapist.

Depression has an impact on your appetite, and thus your energy. The 'can't be bothered' attitude is part of depression. If you don't feel hungry, just make sure you eat small amounts of healthy things, at regular times. That will help with the energy and will to do things. Scheduling and making yourself stick to it will help you.

Everyone has crushes on people they aren't with. If you are happy with your lady and not just pretending then it doesn't matter, after a while you will get over it.

As for friends you have to be confident and just speak to people, it doesn't matter about the whole commuting thing, it just means that occasionally you'll have to plan more, for stopping over maybe, or whatever.
It doesn't even have to be college friends. Go out, meet people. Maybe your girlfriend has some friends you can meet. It's a good place to start, even just to get out talking to people.

 

[Insanum]

So, I'm incredibly depressed. I was seeing a therapist over the summer but I wasn't really getting anything from it. Are there any places online that could help me find a more effective one? Or, are there any better methods of finding one?
Never go online for serious medical help. Always go through your GP. Advice forums are great, but I'm not a medical professional, just another person like you with an opinion. The difference is I'm honest, where as some people (read: Trolls) will try and make out that they are a Doctor. That's when problems happen.

Now this one goes hand in hand with the one above. My girlfriend is an incredibly happy person, but having to deal with me has dampened her spirit considerably. How do I help keep her happy with out lying about me? Or would it be better to lie?

You've got two choices here from what i can see:

1)Continue as you are. You may feel you're getting her down but she is still with you, and if you're being depressive and she's there for you then that could be a good sign.

2) Change. If you change yourself to try and be someone else, then you're trying to be someone else, not you[/I] which is who she is going out with.

Talk to her, She's your girlfriend. Explain to her why you're feeling down if you know. She's your girlfriend, your best friend (supposedly) - the last thing she'd want is for you to suffer for her without her knowing.

Moving on, still semi-related. I entered a new school this semester. I got early admission to a very small college on the other side of my very large Midwestern city. As I can't afford living on campus I commute every morning. It's about a hour and ten, to 1.75 hour commute by train. (This large Midwestern city has very good public transportation.) While I have a presence in class, I have made no friends.

Ok, so straight away you're out of your comfort zone. When you say you havent made friends, have you considered some of the societies? (if there are any) Try to meet as many people as you can, and if you can talk to them, use a bit of charm (read: Not seduce). Its not usually that difficult to make a couple of friends, and if EVERYONE on your course decides to turn you into a social reject, then screw them and focus on your grades. Dont compete with them, be better[/I] than them.

To add insult to injury, I have lost all my old friends aside from the aforementioned girlfriend. How can I go about making friends with down at my college when I have to commute home every night?
Get a later Bus/train. Make time for friends.

Wooh. More relationshit. There is a class mate who I have a total crush on, I'm fairly certain it is entirely because she is 'new and exciting'. How do I get over the crush? (I really don't want to do anything with new-girl, I'm in a very good relationship, and I am very 'happy' with it.)
This is a "Grass is greener" sign. You said you dont want to do anything with her? Why? Reflect on what your mind is telling you. You dont want too for a reason, not just "Im in a relationship, its what i have to say/do"

If any more information would help in giving me advice with any of these scenarios I will be glad to provide you with it. (To an extent)

Thanks in advance.

I've tried to help as best I can, I hope it can be of some assistance.

All the best,
Insanum
(Steve)

 

[NeonOranges]

Depression is a tough gremlin to deal with, being that it can completly take over your life and the best thing you can do is consult a medical proffesional, if therapy doesn't work for you, have you considered medication? I know some people won't take medication for personal reasons and I don't know if that's the case here, but I've been on medication for a while now and it really does help me focus.

 

[Sandernista]

Thank you all for the responses.

I think I know how I am going to proceed with the issues mentioned.

Thanks again for all the great advice!