Grammatical mistakes EVERYONE makes

[Shoqiyqa]

People always seem to pronounce the word "have" the same as the word "half". As in "I half to do this."

I can't imagine anybody being able to mispronounce something that poorly.

You'd've struggled wi' a fello' on 'oliday wi' us in Austria a few years ago, then.

He was pretentious in his behaviour and speech, to the extent that he overpronounced many things. I can accept that southerners call Bath "Baath" and grass "graas" but to call the city "Baaaaaarrrth" and a paraplegic's means of transport a "whu-heel-chu-hair" is ridiculous.

Please note correct spelling of ridiculous.

It happens, we're only human.

That comma is incorrect.

"Affect" and "Effect"

I have no clue how to use either of them.

dictionary.reference.com is a handy resource for this.

Affect as a verb usually means to change or have influence upon something. The roll of a die can greatly affect the whole course of a game.

Affect can also mean to feign. Selfish, manipulative people can affect sympathy to advance their own ends.

Effect as a noun is what you have if you affect something. One cutting interruption can have more effect on an election than a dozen well-rehearsed speeched.

Effect can also be a verb, used in the same context as the more common use of affect but with a different object. My research affected the plan. The effect of my research was a change in the plan. My research effected a change in the plan.

ACK, THE ATTACK OF THE ERRONEOUS COMMAS!

One final thing: for the love of God; it's spelled 'CHEQUE' not 'CHECK'

Dude, even the BANK makes the mistake... damn.

Some people say "can I loan some money", when what they should be saying is "can I BORROW some money".

Anytime someone says the former, I respond with "ok, I want a thousand pounds."

You've honestly had that happen to you? You're surrounded by brainless douchebags.

I regret to inform you that I have been asked: "Can you borrow us a tenner?"

apostrophy

Apostrophe, atrophy and hypertrophy are different words.

if you make a World of Warcraft warrior joke in any manor ...

What if I make such a joke in the manor grounds, or in the fields within view of the manor?

Is this a real word or something the internet made up?, I'm pretty sure the Oxford English Dictionary and Merriam Webster have that term covered with the word "Enraged".

I think "ire" serves well.

Arghh, all my male friends break my TV remotes, the minute I leave the room I hear "click click" of the battery casing being fucked around with, I just know their slipping that casing back in like their loading a gun up.

THEY'RE!

swearing like an pirate is my thing.

a pirate! "Pirate" does not begin with a vowel.

 

[Eponet]

I just love it when people neglect to use semi-colons; it's really not hard to use them correctly.

I've been told that I use them too often; apparently some of mine should be commas.

 

[Snarky Username]

Ok, is not a word. if it were, it would probably be pronounced like "rock" without the "r" sound. O.K. was originally used as a funny way to shorten the word "okay" (haha- "kay" sounds like "K" and "O" sounds like... well, you get the point). Now its become so accepted that most people seem to simply think that is how the word is spelled.

Actually, OK is an acronym that came in the mid-19th century that stands for "All Correct." It was a time when it was fashionable to use acronyms when talking, kind of like the way people use "lol" today. The problem is most people at the time were illiterate and thought the way to spell it was "Ol Korekt" Thus making the acronym "OK."

OT: When I say "Octopuses" and someone corrects me and says "It's actually octopi."

Octopus comes from the Greek, but people assume anything ending in -us means that it comes from a Roman word so it would end in an i. The correct way to spell it is "Octopuses" not "Octopi"

 

[Muramasa89]

I still don't funny understand the correct implementation of ; (comma + dot)...the semicolon!

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/semicolon

EDIT

One final thing: for the love of God; it's spelled 'CHEQUE' not 'CHECK'

'Cheque' is the British spelling, 'Check' is the American. So both are correct, unless you're elitist about AmE being wrong.

Ones that get me are:

'Presume' and 'Assume'
'Whose' and 'Who's'
'Neither' and 'Either'
'Whom' and 'Who'
'Affect' and 'Effect'.

Edit: having just seen it on Facebook, when people add tonnes of kisses ('xxxx') at the end of their words, often replacing a full stop. Is there any bloody need? Females tend to be the culprit of this, and whilst I've seen males do it, I can't understand for the life of me WHY.

 

[Daveman]

People always seem to pronounce the word "have" the same as the word "half". As in "I half to do this."

I can't imagine anybody being able to mispronounce something that poorly.

You'd've struggled wi' a fello' on 'oliday wi' us in Austria a few years ago, then.

He was pretentious in his behaviour and speech, to the extent that he overpronounced many things. I can accept that southerners call Bath "Baath" and grass "graas" but to call the city "Baaaaaarrrth" and a paraplegic's means of transport a "whu-heel-chu-hair" is ridiculous.

I'm a southerner. I do not say "whu-heel-chu-hair". That man must have been an alien in disguise. There is no other logical cause for that level of retardation.

 

[rt052192]

loosing when losing is intended. pisses me off to no end!

 

[mezmerizer02]

People never say Chris' coat as in no double s sound just say it like you would normally say that name. That is the correct way to pronounce it. People however, always say it like it is written this was Chirs's coat. Speaking of however, very few peopel put the comma after however and other words like it.

when it's a noun that is not a name you do not ad the S, when it is not a name, you add the S.

That makes very little sense you have basically contradicted yourself. If a noun is not a naming noun there are different rules eg. princesses. If it is a naming noun however you just use nothing for plural. Although if you want to get into possessive which is what I was giving an example if something ends with the letter s you just add a '. That is it and you don't pronounce it like it is written as 's.

Let's try this again so you can understand. If it is a name that ends with an S (i.e. Smithers) then yes, you do use an apostrophe and an S (pro tip: it show's posession). If it is a regular noun then you do not add the S and only use an apostrophe. Also, we were talking about the times when using an apostrophe is needed, not other times as such with your ridiculous rebuttal using the word princess.Also, you do pronounce both S's when saying someone's name and in a possessive state, otherwise you sound like a blithering idiot.

 

[DrEmo]

You HAVE GOT to see how people use that pairing of words inadequately.

Got is the past tense of get. Have got is a hideous grammatical monstrosity.

No one cares about grammar anymore. Kids are happy typing like cavemen.

 

[googleit6]

I used to use chat speak all the time on msn. Now, ever since a friend told me she couldn't read what I meant, I always try to write properly.

I once heard from my English teacher that you never say "Off of". You just say "Off."

Example: "Get off my chair."
"Get off of my chair."

Apparently, the first one is correct. Now, I can't unuse it. I don't even know if it's correct, but I still refuse to say "Off of" for some strange reason.

Also, the they're/there/their and your/you're mix ups really annoy me, along with the to/too/two mix up. It's so simple to learn, yet people are too lazy to use them properly.

One more thing. Never write numbers as numbers. Spell them out.

 

[LadyRhian]

A good poem that will make you laugh.

God, that would be so hard to read out loud for me. It was funny but in my mind I was correcting what he was saying.

People tend to grossly misuse and overuse commas, especially on the internet. The OP contains several offenses. I don't often notice errors in grammar anymore. I cannot imagine how Grammar Nazis on the internet keep their sanity.

We manage... somehow...

It's not so much about caring, but when people who know how to use grammar properly see such an ill-constructed sentence, they assume you don't know what the heck you are talking about. It might be fine to chat with your friends like that, but it tends to make people sloppier when they need to write/type something where grammar and spelling matter. I mean, with friends, I can type C U L8r, but if I'm writing a story, I type out all the words.

I experience sweet Schadenfreude when I see people who claim grammar and spelling "arnt impertent" do something stupid when it actually matters.

 

[Glademaster_v1legacy]

People never say Chris' coat as in no double s sound just say it like you would normally say that name. That is the correct way to pronounce it. People however, always say it like it is written this was Chirs's coat. Speaking of however, very few peopel put the comma after however and other words like it.

when it's a noun that is not a name you do not ad the S, when it is not a name, you add the S.

That makes very little sense you have basically contradicted yourself. If a noun is not a naming noun there are different rules eg. princesses. If it is a naming noun however you just use nothing for plural. Although if you want to get into possessive which is what I was giving an example if something ends with the letter s you just add a '. That is it and you don't pronounce it like it is written as 's.

Let's try this again so you can understand. If it is a name that ends with an S (i.e. Smithers) then yes, you do use an apostrophe and an S (pro tip: it show's posession). If it is a regular noun then you do not add the S and only use an apostrophe. Also, we were talking about the times when using an apostrophe is needed, not other times as such with your ridiculous rebuttal using the word princess. Also, you do pronounce both S's when saying someone's name and in a possessive state, otherwise you sound like a blithering idiot.

Ok now I see where the problem is because you have actually written in a way that is not convulted. For starters I was more writting phonecitally for how it is supposed to be pronounced as my gripe was not with written but spoken English. Also top tip of the day don't some call someone a blithering idiot or you actually look like a pompus ass.

 

[Shoqiyqa]

[http://img839.imageshack.us/i/apetureaperture.jpg/]

 

[Serioli]

I always took 'I could care less' as meaning 'I care the amount that requires no effort, I could care less but that would require effort I am not willing to put in.'

 

[Au Naturel.]

Then and than. People, including me, mess those up all of the time.

 

[TheRealCJ]

I was talking to someone earlier, and I was about to put, in response, simply the letter "k". Figuring that they deserved at least two letters, I revised that to "ok" and sent it. As Google Chrome's spell check has just informed me, and as my seconds late brain informed me then, it should have been revised to the four letter "okay".

Ok, is not a word. if it were, it would probably be pronounced like "rock" without the "r" sound. O.K. was originally used as a funny way to shorten the word "okay" (haha- "kay" sounds like "K" and "O" sounds like... well, you get the point). Now its become so accepted that most people seem to simply think that is how the word is spelled.

What are some accepted grammatical mistake you frequently see people making?

If it's accepted as the norm, than it's no longer a grammatical error.

Simply put, the English Language is a constantly evolving one. At one time, the word "******" meant "A small bundle of sticks, tied for carrying". Now it's a sexual slur.

You know, I always found it strange that in pre-1900 stories and texts, words like "Can't" were spelt "Ca'n't". This is actually MORE grammatically correct, as both letters have been replaced with ', rather than one.

In 50 years, 100 years time, you won't understand half of what's being written.