Guild rule: no hurt feelings

[Stall]

I think guild guidelines need to be lax in terms of social interaction. I find trying to "over-regulate" (for the lack of a better term) the behavior of a guild just always ends up backfiring, especially something broad to the point where it can be exploited by the leadership to get rid of people they don't like. "No drama" guilds tend to have more drama than other guilds since people have to keep things "pent up," which ends up making a huge mess once members decide to speak up. I imagine something similar would happen with a policy like "don't hurt other people's feelings," since it might just end up creating a very rigid atmosphere.

I think live and let live is the best philosophy with social interactions in guilds. Just because there are no rules like "no hurt feelings" or "no drama" doesn't mean officers and other members shouldn't step in to mediate problems between guild members and such. Besides, true solidarity comes from being able to talk infinite shit about your guildies, and then just laugh it off with 'em.

 

[Blackpapa]

If you don't have thick skin, then you have no business being on the internet. Making fun of each other is how my friends and I show that we care about each other. It's when you're ignored that you should feel bad, not when you're the butt of all the jokes.

Wrong.

On the internet people behave differently than in real life. As such it would be wrong to interpret what people do online as if it were IRL.

I'll admit that I really enjoy myself when I kill someone in a particularly humiliating way and then get get to read a poorly typed litany of profanity and death threats.

Edit: my spell-checker-thingy broke.

 

[UbarElite]

I think it might be nice to try to thin the herd of the ass-hats who aren't helping anyone accomplish what they joined the guild to do in the first place. Without some form of moderation, there would always be those comments glorifying the state as "first" without bothering to watch the video they comment on.

The more heavily restricted one is in terms of hurting the feelings of fellow guild members the fewer times it will happen. It seems to be more trying to stop the simple trolls and dicks who can easily populate and multiply if you let them, rather than someone who occasionally hurts someone's feelings. Some guilds can get rather draconian at times, but I think anyone has the right to run their guilds how they want.

 

[Fishyash]

Ok it's pretty simple.

There should be rules of what is acceptable or not in guild chat, and when interacting with other guildies. If there aren't any, the guild should give you a little slack (I don't know your situation, i'm talking about in general).

And in that case, if you offend someone (and they show offense), you cut it out right away. You should get a warning if you offend someone, unless the rules are more specific. Lay off the insults at least until you get to know the comunity within the guild. Keep the remarks to your friends, because it isn't really that funny when it comes from a stranger.
And I am VERY sure that when you get to know the guild and become a long time member to know the majority of the older members, you can probably insult away and they will laugh and/or retort in kind.

If that's too much to ask from you, then you will probably need to find a guild who doesn't put any rules against insulting/offending people in their chat.
Of course, you can't really PREVENT yourself from offending someone. For you to know they are offended, they need to show it. If guilds punish you for that right away, then that's rather rediculous.

Personally, I would put guild chat rules in. It's just how I would run my guild. Hell, I've been in a guild where profanity is against the rules in guild chat. I don't remember his justification though, I think it was due to children in the guild or something (swears were running freely in teamspeak during raids). It suited me really, I don't swear at all, (ok not literally never but you know what I mean) and it worked perfectly. Sure it wasn't a big guild, but the chat regulations were followed seamlessly and without conflict. A couple of slurs came out (usually because the GM wasn't online lol) from other members but if they got caught a swift warning came in place.

Also, to be honest you shouldn't really judge guild policies if you don't know the GM. It's their guild, their rules. Run your own guild if it's a problem.

EDIT: One more thing: You might be taking it too literally. It's to stop the people who are actively trying to insult people (you should know better than to throw insults at people you don't know).

On a side note, making fun of druids offended people? That is really stupid.

 

[kinapuffar]

Whatever happened to sticks and stones may break my bones? When did that stop being relevant?
They're just words, grow the fuck up.

Well, it stops being relevant when you're talking about an organization within a construct of leisure. They don't have to tolerate people being jerks, they can just kick them right out, without repercussions.

The same "Grow the fuck up" notion could be expected of the people who think they should have the privilege to be rude.

The difference is you can choose whether or not to care what other people say. But it's impossible to ever know if people will, or won't be offended by your comments.

It's entirely subjective, as is your definition of for this scenario World of Warcraft as a construct of leisure.
There are people who play the game for a living, for them it's work, not leisure. So do the rules not apply equally to everyone? And who is to define what leisure is or isn't, and who is or isn't a jerk?

I tell someone "You're full of shit." they think I'm a jerk. But what if my comment was in response to the statement: "The jews are behind 9/11." or "Aliens abducted me when I was 16."
Then I would be completely correct in telling that person that they're an ignorant delusional liar. Even if that offends them.


It's free speech.
I have a right to express my opinion, even if it hurts other people's feelings. Doesn't matter if I'm a nazi, or a conspiracy theorist, or just a right wing nutjob.
Any infringement on that right is censorship, and goes against the very fabric of what makes a democracy.

 

[KeyMaster45]

*snip*

*cough* Now that that's out of the way.

Might I suggest to you, OP, that you ask for such a guild in the recruitment forums. During my years of play I found them to be most helpful in finding guilds which were a good fit for me. I'm sure you'll be able to find one that shares your sense of humor.

 

[Jamboxdotcom]

It all comes down to this: Know Your Audience. Some ribbing and insults are fine if they're directed at people who can appreciate them. Not everyone does.

 

[Feylynn]

Hurt feelings are always and unarguably not good.
In fact, they are terrible, any indication to the contrary makes you a jerk in my opinion.
(There is context here to what they were offended by and whether or not they should have been is subjective but my previous statement is dealing with the idea of purposely hurting.)

What you are looking for are people that share your sense of humor and aren't hurt by it, that is an endeavor I can have a lot more sympathy for. Nothing is less fun then a guild that is full of drama and awkward silence.
You need like minded people that can keep a light-hearted atmosphere.

The raiding guilds I have applied for have always included personality questions on their application and denied people that couldn't contribute to their intended atmosphere, granted I haven't applied to many as the two I have been in (and stayed in for any amount of time) were both wonderful and fit me great.
I recommend staying towards the smaller guilds as they are a lot more personal.

 

[McNinja]

What's wrong with it? I don't see a problem. There is no reason you should be making someone feel bad. If they can take a joke, go ahead, but if you don't know the people, don't make the jokes until you know then better.

Also, before BC was released, I was in this guild. We were running BWL (if you don't get it, you don't get it), and we were on the first boss. We were having some trouble because the guy who was supposed to be assist kiting/killing the adds kept pulling the adds off of the kiter. When he asked in vent "why do they keep attacking me?!" in Vent, the guild leader (named Crazycuban), yelled "BECAUSE GOD HATES YOU NOW SHUT UP."

Laughter filled the vent channel for a good five minutes. And we wiped. Then there was yelling.

If I just joined a guild, I'm not going to call people autistic druid-loving arse nuggets right off the bat. I'd wait a while, start small.