Have you ever cheated in a relationship?

[novixz]

So, have you ever wrongfully cheated in a relationship? In any form, also, views on cheating. I don't think it's wrong to be cheating if you're not happy in the relationship your in. It only becomes a problem when the person you're dating is providing everything you need. I am guilty of emotional cheating on one of my girlfriends, and there is nothing wrong with that. So, did you ever cheat? Did you ever get cheated on?

Edit: Okay, before this becomes a "chew out the OP's opinion" thread, I'd like to clarify. When I say it's okay if you're not happy, I'm talking about when you're telling yourself "Well it's this or nothing nobody else will date me." When it's more like you have a resource draining ***** for a partner and not somebody who really cares for you.

 

[Daystar Clarion]

Never.

Loyal unto death is my family motto, and I intend to keep it that way.

 

[BloatedGuppy]

So, did you ever cheat?

No. Which is not to say I never would. I'd like to think I never would, but only preening idiots say "never" about this kind of thing as though they don't drink water and breathe air like the rest of us fucking mammals.

EDIT: Whoops. Except Daystar, he's cool.

Did you ever get cheated on?

Yes. It sucked, but I forgave her. Years later, we're still friends.

I'm not sure how you came to the conclusion that there's "nothing wrong with it" though. Of course there's something wrong with it. You can make the argument that it's sometimes understandable, or that it's different for everyone, because those are fair arguments. Just hand-waving it as "there's nothing wrong it it, woop woop" though, smacks of some pretty lazy self-validating.

 

[Colour Scientist]

I've never cheated on anyone and, to my knowledge, I have never been cheated on.

If you're not happy in a relationship, why don't you leave and then pursue other people? Rather than fucking the other person around because you don't have the guts to end it? Cheating is cheating.

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

I haven't, no. I consider cheating to be dishonourable, even if you're unhappy in the relationship. You should at least have the decency to break up with them before you go off with someone else.

Someone has cheated on their boyfriend with me though... I didn't know they were in a relationship and we were quite drunk, turned out the guy was a prick anyway, but I still wouldn't say it was completely ok.

 

[Quaidis]

There's a wide difference between 'cheating' and 'looking for a new job', even if they are both alike on first notice.

'Looking for a new job' stipulates that, while working on one realm of employment (a job), you hate it so much that you are filling out applications and submitting forms to other realms, hoping for them to hire you. After you are hired by employment 2 (the other, better job), you can more easily quit your first money-deploying local of disinterest.

'Cheating' is the acknowledgement that the person you are currently dating is not at all what you dreamed of and the whole thing is falling flat. Upset by this, you go around and shop for other qualified singles until you find one that also likes you back. Then you go and dump your first object of affection.


Unlike 'looking for a new job', which normally ends in employment opportunity 1 simply hiring someone else, 'cheating' results in the person you first dated getting real emotional and upset (telling their friends, family, friends' families, and everyone you could possibly know on facebook what a two-timing jerk you are), and the person who you wish to date in the future finding out and not trusting you. I mean, to date 2, you could easily do the same to them as you did to date 1. Date 2's likely to also tell friends, family, etc the same thing. Then you get dumped, yourself and have a harder time getting hooked up in that circle.

The best course of action is to part first, wait a week or two, then look for another date. This will keep you in the clean and there will be no karma that will bite you in the ass.

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

Controversy ahoy... well maybe not, we'll see.

OT: No I've never cheated and (to my knowledge) never been cheated on. I also don't believe that it's right, if you're not in love with someone or don't feel the relationship has anything left to offer, you should break up before looking else-ware. There's just no way in my head, I can justify that cheating is OK.

That being said, I don't see "Looking at the menu" to be the same as cheating, it's OK to look, just don't touch.

If by "Emotional cheating" you mean having feelings for another while you're currently with someone else, that's a little bit of a gray zone, especially if you have those feelings for a person you can't otherwise have. I'd probably put that into the "look, don't touch" category, however if it becomes to much of a distraction, you should probably break up with you're current love interest.

 

[Nerexor]

I'm assuming by cheating that you mean engaging in a relationship with someone else while currently in a serious relationship.

And in that case, no, cheating is not okay and I have never done so and can't see a situation where I would. Having been cheated on, it sucks beyond anything else. If you want to go out with someone else, end the current relationship. If you just don't like the girl/guy you're with, then there's a simple solution to that too. Stop being with them.

Once out of the relationship, do whatever you want.

 

[LordFish]

Well I've done it before, but it's not ideal, and I'd never recommend it, but sometimes it can seem like your only chance to be happy for a few brief moments.

Also I've been single for a long time and I can often be the quick lay that the girl cheats on her boyfriend with... This doesn't bother me, that's on her back.

 

[Rawne1980]

I have never cheated on my wife but I have cheated on women i've been in relationships with before.

Quite a few times.

 

[thebakedpotato]

It's only cheating if you don't propose a threesome first.

 

[Dragonclaw]

I have neverr cheated, emotionally or otherwise. I HAVE broken up with a girl first because it wasn't want I wanted AND I was developing feelings for someone else.

I have been cheated on and it sucks. My first marriage ended because of it (as did the daycare center she worked for when the wife of the person my wife had the affair with sued becuase their staff member wrecked her family). Had another girl cheat on my and we tried to make it work...but once trust is lost it's a struggle to get it back, eventually the relationship was just too damaged from the incident and we just weren't able to recover. I know she regrets it and keeps going over the what-ifs...but while friendship remains,neither of us look at each other the same because of what happened.

 

[FamoFunk]

I have cheated in previous relationship, quite a lot. It was a shitty relationship.

I never have in my current 4 year relationship though.

 

[vacerious]

Technically, I was one of the cheaters in my first "relationship." I was the backdoor man (meaning I was the guy the girl was cheating on her boyfriend with.) It was fun, but I wouldn't do it again. The guilt really starts to rack up after you get a chance to meet the poor guy, and there's always that hovering sense of guilt you can sense from the lady because these types of relationships are almost always about the sex and little else. The poor lady might go a long type without any loving from her SO, so she becomes attracted to the first male that provides for that appropriate void. And it is fun at first, but it's rare for a relationship that starts this way to end with the two involved becoming an item.

Anyways, after a few months I called it off, and I think it left her feeling very confused and emotional. I make it a habit not to sleep with taken women now. I know that I'd hate to find out it was my girl cheating on me, and in my experience it can become painful unless you're really good at staying emotionally uninvolved. I won't say it wasn't fun while it lasted, because it was, but I certainly wouldn't advocate it to anyone else.

Pretty much the same here. Though, the lady and I broke off rather peacefully (we're still friends) and her latest bf seems like an even better guy than the last one, so I'm happy for her.

 

[SckizoBoy]

So, have you ever wrongfully cheated in a relationship?

Reading that, one wonders... how does one rightfully cheat on a partner?

OT: No... nor have I been cheated on... I disapprove, for any number of obvious and probably vapid reasons... *shrug*

 

[Phasmal]

No, I've never cheated. And I'm pretty sure I never would.
Loyalty is important to me, and I think if you are unhappy enough to cheat then you should end your relationship first.

 

[hazabaza1]

Never really had the opportunity to, but my general opinion is that if you really want to go fuck someone else, you can at least break off your current relationship.