Help me make a good excuse for my bruises!
- Thread starter Marcus McLean
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Soon it will lead it's computer army against mankind! Only to be foiled by lack of mobility.Clearing the Eye said:
Just tell the truth, it's a pretty petty thing to lie about.
A woman will pick a truthful guy 9 times out of 10, and that 1 isn't worth the hassle.
Plus women have an innate sense for liars =P
Trust me mate, just go with the truth. If she gives you a hard time over it take it with good faith, a joke between friends is no big thing. Plus if she cares about you she won't care anyway.
Like DeLux said, she might have her own silly story about doing something along these lines to share.
Either way mate, best of luck on your date and the many more to come ^_^
A woman will pick a truthful guy 9 times out of 10, and that 1 isn't worth the hassle.
Plus women have an innate sense for liars =P
Trust me mate, just go with the truth. If she gives you a hard time over it take it with good faith, a joke between friends is no big thing. Plus if she cares about you she won't care anyway.
Like DeLux said, she might have her own silly story about doing something along these lines to share.
Either way mate, best of luck on your date and the many more to come ^_^
Kung-Fu Deathmatch
Alternatively, you got in a fight with a surprisngly bad-ass fly who flew into your face at such a velocity your face became bruised and you were temporarily rendered unconscious.
Or the Truth I guess...
Alternatively, you got in a fight with a surprisngly bad-ass fly who flew into your face at such a velocity your face became bruised and you were temporarily rendered unconscious.
Or the Truth I guess...
Needs more of this. My suggestion: Start off by something completely ridiculous shit like you wrestled a bear, and then just say "No, actually the truth is: ...". And you'll get a good laugh out of it and then you jump to bed and everyone's happy.Elementary - Dear Watson said:
Tell her your pimp beat you up when you told him you had met a beautiful woman and you wanted to give up being a rentboy.
It's much better than telling the truth: on NO account must she get to know the real you.
Actually, why don't you say it was a shaving accident? You could claim that you always bruise up whenever you cut your face.
It's much better than telling the truth: on NO account must she get to know the real you.
Actually, why don't you say it was a shaving accident? You could claim that you always bruise up whenever you cut your face.
that bruise is not so big so if she noticed it and told you what is it you
1. go with the truth which may result in
1. she laugh and get warmer with you
2. she forgets it after a while and nothing happens
3. she thinks you are a wierdo and she dumps you which means she is not the one for you
2. completely deny you know what happened and act completely surprised which if you act well nothing happens. she may try to guess some reasons and if one seemed good enough you can say "oh yeah that happened"
1. go with the truth which may result in
1. she laugh and get warmer with you
2. she forgets it after a while and nothing happens
3. she thinks you are a wierdo and she dumps you which means she is not the one for you
2. completely deny you know what happened and act completely surprised which if you act well nothing happens. she may try to guess some reasons and if one seemed good enough you can say "oh yeah that happened"
Thread moved to Off Topic.
Go with "Me and my friend were practising American Football and he tried to do a backflip and kicked me in the face".
Go with "Me and my friend were practising American Football and he tried to do a backflip and kicked me in the face".
Tell the truth. It's a particularly shitty story so you'll have to use some charm to make it hilarious. If you can do that though then you're not gonna have much trouble with the close.
"Yeah, I can't really talk about it cause, you know, the first rule is you cant talk about it it".
Or something like that. Then just pause for suspense and say what really happened and try to play it off as comedy. If she doesn't want to keep going out with you over a small bruise caused by an irrational tick then sorry man.
Or something like that. Then just pause for suspense and say what really happened and try to play it off as comedy. If she doesn't want to keep going out with you over a small bruise caused by an irrational tick then sorry man.
Why ... Would you pinch your own face? Kids these days ...
Tell her someone tried to mug you but you faught back . Then you will get sympathy and admiration. The downside to this is , if you are with her and someone tries to mug you guys , you gotta be brave and not scream like a little girl .
OR
Tell the truth , and take a picture of her face when she hears it and post it here so me can all see her facepalm .
Tell her someone tried to mug you but you faught back . Then you will get sympathy and admiration. The downside to this is , if you are with her and someone tries to mug you guys , you gotta be brave and not scream like a little girl .
OR
Tell the truth , and take a picture of her face when she hears it and post it here so me can all see her facepalm .
"You know, for all the jokes, getting into a fight with Chuck Norris was still a bad idea..."
"There was this bus full of orphan children. And they all jumped me!..."
"Copious amounts of alcohols+couple of idiots+stairs+shopping cart..."
"Bears are not too keen on hugs..."
"That's when I realised the light at the end of the tunnel was a train..."
"This weird dude outside Tesco's/Walmart was throwing fluffy kittens at all passer-by's..."
"Apparently, women get upset when you make fun of their fashion sense..."
...But luckily, I managed to walk away with only this bruise
That, or just do what everyone is saying and tell the truth. She'll think you're quirky. Chicks dig quirky
"There was this bus full of orphan children. And they all jumped me!..."
"Copious amounts of alcohols+couple of idiots+stairs+shopping cart..."
"Bears are not too keen on hugs..."
"That's when I realised the light at the end of the tunnel was a train..."
"This weird dude outside Tesco's/Walmart was throwing fluffy kittens at all passer-by's..."
"Apparently, women get upset when you make fun of their fashion sense..."
...But luckily, I managed to walk away with only this bruise
That, or just do what everyone is saying and tell the truth. She'll think you're quirky. Chicks dig quirky
Burst blood vessels just under the skin. And leave it at that.
If she asks how they burst, say they couldn't withstand the pressure applied. If she asks what caused the pressure, just tell her the truth, but don't get a cat.
If she asks how they burst, say they couldn't withstand the pressure applied. If she asks what caused the pressure, just tell her the truth, but don't get a cat.