Hmmm...the first paragraph isn't really needed. Why you have a city there doesn't really matter for the moment (though an oasis in a trade hub is a reasonable reason for one). You can put that backstory in somewhere else.
That the monsters once came out of the hole in the ground also isn't needed, if the story is going to be about people going into it and fighting them there. Again, you can put that in somewhere else, not needed here.
1) I think you could trim it down a little bit. It's not bad, but it could be great. The idea for the story was enough to make me curious, but it feels like the exposition goes on too long. Cut it down to the core details, and then tell us about the rest of the plot later. Remember, you objective should be to hook the player, not to tell them the whole story. You can tell them the story gradually throughout the game.
2) Add some personality, it's a little dry. You can make the narrator unreliable. You can give the speaker some personality. Maybe they seem a little... off. Maybe they don't seem trustworthy. Maybe they seem broken. Maybe their eccentric and funny. Maybe they're one of the main characters.
3) Withhold information. I know, this seems like the opposite of what you should do, but bare with me. Instead of telling your audience about your world, deliberately withhold information. Give them very little to go on. This will create a sense of mystery that your audience will want to solve. They'll be eager to play the game because they want to know what's going on. Let me give you an example of a strong opening:
This is a great intro because it asks the player questions instead of providing information. It's pretty simple on the surface. James has traveled to Silent Hill because his wife sent him a letter. The problem? His wife is dead! Well, now I'm curious. How does a dead person send a letter? There's only one way to find out. I'll have to play the game! As the player I can't wait to get started.
Just look at the way it's written. James is constantly asking questions. How can a dead person send a letter? What's our special place? Why am I looking for her? Is she actually alive? It creates anticipation. Instead of providing answers to your players you should be asking them questions. You can give them details later. You already have the raw materials in place. Where did the monsters come from? Where did the beam of light come from? What's going to happen in the future? Glaze over the boring stuff and focus on the most interesting part.
These intro's create a sense of interest and curiosity in the player
This is good advice. Your intro was pretty dry and boring, my eyes were glazing over before I had finished the first paragraph.
Another idea is framing it as somebody telling a legend, and having a little trouble remembering the details now and then.
like:
"Now how did it go again? Ah! I remember.
Long ago several kingdoms were engaged in trade with each other. But trade was difficult, dangerous, and costly in those days. You see. By sea, pirates, storms, and sea creatures sunk the trade ships, while land routes were long and indirect, caravans were plagued by bandits and blocked by grueling mountain passes."
... or something, I dunno.
By the time I finished reading that, I'd already be pissed off that so much exposition prevented me from playing the game. I'd rather learn this stuff in the game.
"Deep in the desert, a stairway coils into the earth. Those that found it soon discovered great wonders in the caves below, and most precious of all, water! Over the years a whole city, Aridia, grew by this oasis. A jewel of the desert. Explorers travelled to Aridia, so that they too could descend the stairs to seek treasure. But then one day, a mysterious force emerged from the depths, surrounding the city and imprisoning everyone within. With no hopes of escape, the people of Aridia have no choice but to descend deeper and deeper into the earth. You are one of those poor souls, poised on the edge of the abyss."
That's as long as I would afford it, though really it should be shorter still. Your job as a story teller is to get to the point, or rather, get us to the point.
Long ago several kingdoms were engaged in trade with each other. But trade was difficult, dangerous, and costly in those days. By sea, pirates, storms, and sea creatures sunk the trade ships. Land routes were long and indirect, caravans were plagued by bandits and blocked by grueling mountain passes. Yet there was a way that had not been attempted. A desert centrally located between the trading kingdoms; crossing it would be a far more direct route between the kingdoms. So in the name of gold and commerce a caravan of trailblazers was formed and began their trek across the harsh sands. They were accompanied by Magi who could magically find water hidden deep within the ground and bring it to the surface. Midway through their journey the Magi detected a massive source of fresh water nearby. Their spells led them to something they did not expect; a titanic spiraling staircase that twisted deep into the earth as far as the eye could see down and within its caves, life-giving water.
Thus a sprawling metropolis soon grew on the edge of the massive pit. For this location was exactly centered between the trading kingdoms and would become a bustling trade hub for years to come. This shining new city would be called Aridia, truly a jewel of the desert. Individuals from all walks of life and races flocked to Aridia and it became a melting pot. Drawn to it's mystery, explorers from the young Aridia journeyed down into the subterranean realm returning with troves of treasure and goods from it's expansive ruins and caverns. But this flourishing city was not without strife. Soon after the first adventurers went below, hordes of monsters began to spew forth from the gaping hole to bloody the gilded streets of Aridia.
This is a perfectly fine piece of backgroundlore but I don't think it should be in your introduction but somewhere later in your game in a calm moment. You should maybe take 1-3 senteces to get out of the way that we are speaking of a 'wealthy trade city, in the desert near a water source and a great pit' and then introduce your crucial plotpoints to get your story moving: a weird magical catastrophy destroyed everyone and everything but the city. It's strange that this demographic, historical and economic background that won't even matter much in your actual story should take up so much time at the start, when you want to grab attention.
Also, some general tips: I would recommend against starting sentences with 'but', 'or', 'and'. If you want to start with 'but', you can also use 'however'. Also, try not to use the same word too often, too close, like I am doing here with 'also'. There is more, but I'm tired, and am going to sleep now.
I thought it sounded pretty good. I didn't like "Adventurer's license exam" though it sounds kind of dry and a bit stupid. I think you should rename it too something more powerful or legendary. It sounds like someone who is just getting their commercial license
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