Homosexuality in Today's Society

[Mariena]

No trouble at all here. Probably because I'm not male.

"Ooh, lesbian. That's hot."

I think I've said enough.

 

[Talon_Kale]

I agree that coming out to yourself is one of the hardest things to do. I finally managed that at uni and have been better for it since. I figure i will tell my folk once i can finally support myself and move out. I doubt they will be botherd they still have another son lol

 

[Hamster at Dawn]

I hate people who act stereotypically gay. I haven't actually met any in real life but in movies and such like you always see these annoying camp pricks who think everything is fabulous. Actual gay people I have no problem with. All the gay people I've met in real life have been just like ordinary heterosexuals... but gay, obviously. I wouldn't know that they were gay if they hadn't said.

 

[Bofus Teefus]

I'm not gay but without having to bore everyone here with the details, my mother once said to me 'I don't mind if you are gay... I'd just prefer it if you're not'.

What do you say to that!?

You can go with what I said when my mom hit my straight self with that same line- "Yeah, thanks Mom. Didn't have enough of a complex as it is." My step-bro had come out of the closet shortly before she hit me with that, and I'd been too busy to really date at all, so she was wondering if I was gay also. Speaking of my step-bro...

Most folks out here are either openly homophobic or they're "all right" with it until it's actually one of their kids.

Sorry if this line gets excessively quoted, but it is so true.

His dad was openly homophobic until he found out, and has since remained neutral, although I was in the room when he first found out, and he did have the "my son is gay" face. He's never had anything negative to say though.

His mom flat out disowned him. Don't get me wrong, she was fairly screwed up to begin with, but seriously- disowning your kid?

 

[blindey]

Honestly there are two aspects of coming out. If you are effeminate and everyone already thinks you are gay then it doesn't really matter but if you are the more "straight acting" gay guy (god I hate that description) like I am and a lot of your friends are homophobes or are at least people that may act different towards you if you come out then it is a really hard thing to do.

I think the hardest thing about being gay is the fact that people clump us in to some large group like we all have something in common. True as a gay guy I like guys romantically and sexually but there is little else that being gay does for me when trying to connect to other gay men. People make assumptions about you that are completely unfounded unless they take the time to get to know you but often they don't if they know you are gay. This is true of the big stereotypes as much as it is of the smaller lesser known stereotypes.

For example a big stereotypes (fashion) no I don't care about fashion I think it is stupid, I wear the clothes I want to and rock it so hard that I am always fresh to death.
Example small lesser known stereotype (religion) No I have not rejected religion or God because I am gay. In fact I have probably done more research on religion then the average person has but on the history of religion and its evolution of belief and on the bible itself. I believe in God, I go to church, And I believe in the afterlife.....I just don't believe that homosexuality is wrong in the eyes of God. I do hate the average conservative religious fanatic though

Oh and homophobia is rampant people hate gay people with a burning passion and the ones that don't usually don't respect them in the slightest.

I know what you mean by people grouping us all together (nevermind all the various sub-cultures within the culture of homosexuality being seen as the mainstream for better or worse). For instance the gay club on campus I mentioned earlier: There's about let's say 35 (approximately) gay or bi guys there, then for friend or more material I'd filter down and to be honest, not a lot would come down through my filter.

That leads into the next point: the difficulty of socialization and dating. Typically (it is a stereotype but it's still true, albeit growing less and less as the years go by) the average gay guy who just wants sex. I don't. I want a relationship, or at least friendship and honestly I could barely care at all about sex until the relationship has gone on for a good while. Anywho, I really think that's one of the problems.

See what's the typical venue for that stuff? The places that come to mind specifically are bars and clubs, neither of which appeal to me.

For a straight person it's easier - just go to an organization/club/whatever related to one of your interests, there's bound to be a girl or guy there (respectively) for at least a date. Not so with us, as it's hit or miss with that.

edit:

i dont think its hard for gay people to "come out" anymore unless you live in a complete conservative town, its almost natural. and seeing as a majority of businesses comply to the anti-discrimination acts, finding a job or career isnt difficult either. do i support gay people? meh, i dont really care. I do find it hypocritical that they are not allowed to marry in the united states [with the exception of a few states], you know, the land of the free, where every man woman and child have rights? side note, a domestic partnership [what gay people are able to recieve in most states] does not carry the same rights as a marriage [insurance, tax return, divorces, ect.]

I really have to take issue with this, Kalezian. I know what you mean in the sense of a bigger chunk of society is more tolerant and stuff, but even so as has been said by myself and a couple of others : the process is a long and difficult one, pretty much no matter who you are, from people who grew up and their parents/friends were pretty accepting to those who are hardcore evangelicals (My heart goes out to the latter, as I know a few friends that had developed complexes and psychosis because of that...)

 

[Cowabungaa]

No trouble at all here. Probably because I'm not male.

"Ooh, lesbian. That's hot."

I think I've said enough.

High fiiiive!!!


Anyway, I couldn't care less, except when they hit on me obviously, but I really couldn't care less if someone was gay or not.

 

[Talon_Kale]

See what's the typical venue for that stuff? The places that come to mind specifically are bars and clubs, neither of which appeal to me.

For a straight person it's easier - just go to an organization/club/whatever related to one of your interests, there's bound to be a girl or guy there (respectively) for at least a date. Not so with us, as it's hit or miss with that.

I can agree with you on that. There arent many places near me where gay people can go to start with and those there are done appeal to me coz everybody there seems to be intent on only one thing. I would love to find someone i could acutally relate to (or be in a relationship with) but is very hard to do. I guess time is a deciding factor in this.

 

[Higurashi]

*snipsnip*

Well, I suppose I could give you the Swedish perspective of things gay. Homosexuality is very accepted here. Almost to the point where people are encouraged to it by friends. When it comes to family, however, the older generation before us is still a bit sceptic. I have a bisexual lady friend who has gotten crap for being that from her parents all her life. It's pretty devastating to her, and I'm pretty mad at her parents for it. That being said, I don't show it.

The problem with it being encouraged here is that we now have the male gay mob, and the lesbian mob in Stockholm. This kind of phenomena could only arise in our capital city; the largest city in Sweden. The lesbian mob has been very violent recently, and often without provocation. My lady friend's best friend, who is gay, got assaulted and beaten down by a gang of lesbians without reason at a pub barely a month ago. They used bottles and everything. His face was pretty messed up, and he has many stitches now.

So yeah, it's very accepted here, but they've also alienated themselves by purpose. I'd think all homosexual people would unite under one banner, but now they've gotten so many they think they can take their own stand and wage war against everyone else. Pretty stupid. I hope the categorisation subsides in favour of open-mindedness once more.

As for me, I am also bisexual. I have actually not encountered any problems at all because of it. There are at least three reasons for this.
1) I did not tell anyone too early in life.
2) I have not joined any of the gay gangs that are present in some places. I stay clear of that categorisation entirely.
3) The previously mentioned acceptance of homosexuality in Sweden, and the fact that I have sought and found open-minded friends.

*tips hat* That's all from me, folks. Thanks for your time.

 

[Orekoya]

I would like to know more about gay people, purely for the sake of understanding.

Is it difficult being gay in this day and age? If so, in what ways?

Do you encounter prejudice or discrimination? If so, how do you deal with it?

How does being gay affect other areas of you life?

S'okay I guess, in the states and most everyone walks around like mindless chimps not looking to start anything so other than the lack of rights or the occasional idiot saying belligerent bs I don't see any significant difference between how I live my life and how my straight friends live theirs. Well, there is the case of censorship of everyday speech for gays too, but since I don't bother with that, it's more the problem of those I talk to than my own. The people with problematic lives are those living out these easily identifiable boundaries, the more uncommon sexualities like bis or trannies.

 

[elemenetal150]

i dont think its hard for gay people to "come out" anymore unless you live in a complete conservative town, its almost natural. and seeing as a majority of businesses comply to the anti-discrimination acts, finding a job or career isnt difficult either. do i support gay people? meh, i dont really care. I do find it hypocritical that they are not allowed to marry in the united states [with the exception of a few states], you know, the land of the free, where every man woman and child have rights? side note, a domestic partnership [what gay people are able to recieve in most states] does not carry the same rights as a marriage [insurance, tax return, divorces, ect.]

The whole job thing is completely false, unless it is a huge corporation or a federal job you aren't guaranteed anything against discrimination. I work at a place right now where if they found out I was gay I would be fired and ti is retail. Also something to keep in mind is in some states they have the no fault system where they can just fire you for no reason at all and it is OK and you can't do anything about it. I one of my few actually gay friends (most of my friends are straight) got fired from Chik-fil-a for being gay but they told him it was because he was late twice...but it happened like a day after he came out at work.

 

[LadyZephyr]

No trouble at all here. Probably because I'm not male.

"Ooh, lesbian. That's hot."

I think I've said enough.

So you've never gotten the token, "all you need is the right man" bullshit yet? Lucky.

 

[AgentNein]

I'm not gay, but I've got a few gay friends. I live in a fairly forward-thinking part of the city, artsy district, and everybody is pretty cool with it. Although I'm sure this isn't the case everywhere.

In fact, that crazy pasture who stages protests of gay funerals (and military funerals, because god hates america for tolerating gays) is coming to my neck of the woods in a month or two. What a douche.

 

[Ronwue]

No trouble at all here. Probably because I'm not male.

"Ooh, lesbian. That's hot."

I think I've said enough.

I have imagined this conversation in an IRC chatroom.

"You're gay!? Omg, gays need to die"

"Actually... I'm not... I'm a lesbian"

"ASL PLS"

 

[Fronken]

From what i've understood it isnt all that hard to be gay in this day and age, as tolerance and acceptance is fairly wide now, though i suspect there still being Alot of prejudice from older people and religious people, but thankfully you can just ignore those.

And much like 90% of this thread, im not gay myself, but i know some people who are, and im fine with that, the term "Whatever floats your boat" really applies, as long as they dont try and make their moves on me im fine with it.

 

[Giovanto]

I'm sure everyone would like to hear this from the point of a strong Christian. I'm very into my beliefs in God and acceptance of Jesus, however, I do not consider myself an extremist Conservative fanatic. In fact, while mostly Right-Wing my political views are mixed. Why is that? Remember Proposition 8? I opposed it. Greatly. I think its a sign of Intolerance for our fellow people.

Now, it is true that the Bible forbids homosexual activity. BUT, by being intolerant we are ALSO doing great wrong. The Bible, and Jesus himself, forbid us from judging and condemning other people. We are suppose to love everyone. So why are we hating and condemning gays? It shows just how human WE are.

Oh yeah, and while I'm talking about Religion and gays, I better mention this guys: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Km5IYHj1wn4

Thats part 1 of 8 of a more...civilized Documentary about the WBC, the biggest hater of gays and they give REAL Christians a bad name.

My personal beliefs are obvious at this point, I do have many gay friends. I don't mind talking to them in public, either. So I leave everyone with this:

Do not judge others and God won't judge you, don't condemn others and God won't condemn you, forgive others and God will forgive you, give to others and God will give to you. - Luke:6 37-38.

 

[Fronken]

No trouble at all here. Probably because I'm not male.

"Ooh, lesbian. That's hot."

I think I've said enough.

I can see what you're talking about, i sadly am pretty much the same, when it comes to male-male sex and intimacy i think its kinda discusting, but that's probably because im a straight man myself, but when it comes to girl-on-girl its pretty much one of my biggest turn-ons, which really doesnt make sense seeing as lesbians arent interested in me :S

 

[Lullabye]

I've met all types of gays. From stereotypical to manlier than me. I've got a few gay friends and from what i've seen and heard they are just as miserable as the rest of us.
I'm all for gays. just please don't hit on me. or any other straight guy, it hurts our pride a bit.

 

[WarpGhost]

I'd say im fairly tolerant, but if two guys or girls suddenly started making out in front of me I'd be pretty shocked and disgusted (less so disgusted with the girls, but probably a lot more embarressed than with the guys). Not that its any of my business, but because it doesnt make sense to me as a heterosexual man (men are ugly, smelly, obnoxious creatures, I cant understand how women like them much less other men; I know i've been one for long enough ;p ) when confornted with the concept it still has the power to shock and confuse even those of us in whose heart of hearts is accepting.

I dont think that will ever go away because whilst homosexuality is 'normal' in many species, its still not 'usual' (which people think means the same as 'normal', which causes many of the problems). And making a big fuss about it either way doesnt solve the problems, it just polarises what ultimately should be a non-issue.

 

[Skalman]

I'm indifferent. Why should they be treated any different than the rest of us. They have the same rights as any other.

I don't know any gay people, at least i don't think I do.
For simplicity's sake: I am not aware that anyone I know is gay.

I think the reason may be that people who are gay tend to hide it to escape prejudice and oppression.