How can I become 'cool'

[Squilookle]

Step one: don't assume that everyone thinks you're uncool. That's setting yourself up for failure right out of the gate.

Commit yourself to constant self improvement. Doesn't matter what area. Not being perfect is a lot easier when you know you're actively doing something about it, but you have to stick at it

Typically, cool is causing maximum effect with minimum effort. I once read that you can tell the size of someone by the amount of things that bother him/them. And you gotta admit it's kinda true. You injure yourself and people ask if it hurts?

"It bloody KILLS, man!" - big reaction, pretty standard.
"I'll live" - Non-reactionary. Unfazed. Cool.

Someone tells you they won the lottery?

"OMG WOW THAT'S SO AMAZING WTF BBQ" - gushy, overblown, not cool.
"Well done mate- which draw was it?" Acknowledge, then ask about an aspect most others would miss = cooler

You see a guy go and chat up a girl at a bar. The more effortless he makes it look, the cooler he appears. In TV shows, the big boss always has other people running around doing things for them. Minimal effort, maximum effect. Try making your actions and speech more like that and you'll start seeming smoother.

You get the general idea.

 

[Asita]

Well given local temperatures, you could turn down the heater. That would make you mighty cool, mighty fast. Also, take coolness lessons from this guy. The shirt tells you everything you need to know about him.

 

[NiPah]

Ice cubes help, or a really good AC.
Also people up North are usually cooler, as a Floridian I'm not very cool, but I am damn fine.

 

[Drathnoxis]

Wear sunglasses all the time, even in the dark and in your sleep!
Never, under any circumstances, stand or sit up straight!
Never express any interest or emotion other than boredom at how pitifully less cool the rest of the world is than you.
You must have rips in your jeans! Only losers have well maintained clothing.
Keep your hands in your pockets as much as possible, even if it's impractical or just plain stupid!

Spoiler: Like, even if you are in a fight, with a knife in your teeth, KEEP THOSE HANDS IN THEIR POCKETS!

Like, even if you are in a fight, with a knife in your teeth, KEEP THOSE HANDS IN THEIR POCKETS!

Hang out in alleyways or other dingy, gross locations. Dumpsters are very cool!
Get a switchblade comb, and pull it out to touch up your do every 5 minutes.
Never actually do anything, you can be cool without succeeding, but failing is never cool.
Wear a leather jacket everywhere you go, even if it's really hot and it gets all sticky.
You must get at least 2 cronies who are much, much less cool than you so that you look like the emperor of cool, just by comparison.
And smoke! Lung cancer and tar stained fingers are the epitome of cool!

 

[Fijiman]

Have you tried using the power of corn? And if that doesn't work try a corn-potato mix.

 

[StormShaun]

I hear a good fisting can give you some respect around certain communities.
Mainly pornstarts.

BUT hey, Taco, you can finally fulfill both of your dreams.
Be friends by pornstars, and be FISTED by pornstars.

...Oh... and be cool, I guess.

 

[Katherine Kerensky]

You'll always be cool to me, Taco!
If that isn't enough, I don't know what is.
Maybe, I dunno... get more screaming fangirls?

 

[McElroy]

Join the Escapist on March 16th 2012. Anything else won't work. 3rd of April 2013 is the only respectable contender.

 

[RedRockRun]

Become a nihilist. The less you care, the cooler you are. I'm not even joking. Showing any kind of emotional investment in something along with any kind of accentuated emotion is seen as being uncool. If you ask random people, they're most likely not going to know what you're talking about, but trust me on this; it's seated deep in humans.

 

[Zombie_Fish]

In order to be cool, you need to break all the rules.

But only the uncool ones. Don't break the cool rules, because that wouldn't be cool.

 

[Tsun Tzu]

Well if you're in Indiana at the moment just walk outside and you'll be 'cool'

... Oh you mean the other type of 'cool' don't you? ... Yeah I got nothing

This.

I don't recommend this. Cold as balls out right now.

OP: But to be cool in the metaphorical sense? I suggest you do cool things. Like me. Do what I do...

Daddy-o.

[small]Mainly, purchase a dakimakura on a whim then feel ashamed of yourself. *finger guns*[/small]

Or, alternatively, become a cat. Because, honestly, a cat's the only cat who knows where it's at.

 

[Hagi]

You should definitely make a MySpace profile. Get you some of them McHammer gifs up in there, a few blink tags and some rad background music.

You'll be hanging with the cool kids in no time.

 

[Barbas]

Wear a sombrero. And if you can't be cool and wear a sombrero at the same time, what's the point in being cool at all?

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

One word:

Ponchos.

Y'all need ponchos. Bitches love ponchos.

 

[IamLEAM1983]

Honestly, I'd start a Snapchat account I'd document with a profuse amount of small vids showing how much of a spontaneous and energy-filled young devil I am, if I were you. Use ALL of the Snap filters, and never fail to use the Goku one when it crops up.

You'll never be cool if you don't go Fake Saiyan while yelling nonsense about your latest dump or hating your job.

 

[Wakey87]

You can't be cool to everyone, see those kids smoking weed behind the bike sheds? loosers, their only cool to the other loosers. Find what you like and own it, people will either find it cool or not.

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

Escapists, as you all know, I'm a not the coolest ************ on the planet

Well, I want to change that starting ASAP

What should I do in order to become cool?

Dude you're a Psychic Taco. The only way to get any cooler than that would be to be a psychic/telekinetic/matter-warping Chimichanga who hangs out with Deadpool...

Sorry, I've got DP on the brain... saturated in 4th wall breaking comedy.

 

[Poetic Nova]

Dip yourself in a bathtub full of icecubes.

 

[Neurotic Void Melody]

You are already there. Being funny, bringing joy to other people's lives is essentially all you need, which you already possess. It is less about image and more about what you do and bring to others. The idea of "cool" in the general kiddy/teenage sense is only skin deep. You just need to be your own character in a way that inspires others. Maybe that sounds too vague, but we are all so different, it is difficult not to be. Just keep making people smile, that will always be cool as long as humanity exists.

 

[ccggenius12]

I got this. That is, Bruce Campbell's got your back.

Spoiler

Truly, this video can be applied to any abstract social construct.