How can the friend zone debate end?

[00slash00]

Sorry if the title is misleading but THIS IS NOT ABOUT DEBATING WHETHER THE FRIEND ZONE IS REAL or coming up with some bulletproof argument. it seems like every time there is a debate about the friend zone it always degrades into girls saying "there is no friend zone, guys just cant deal with rejection" and guys going "the friend zone is real because girls only date assholes."

lately i have seen this popping up a lot
http://ifeelokay.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/maybe-friendzone-is-bullshit.jpg

and im pretty sure we have all seen this
http://www.eatliver.com/img/2011/7783.jpg

do you think this is a debate that will just rage on forever and get progressively more insulting, or is there any way there could be some sort of middle ground that the two sides could eventually reach?

 

[Daystar Clarion]

Man, I don't know about the Friend Zone, I can't seem to get out of the Danger Zone.

I just got through the Green Hill Zone, got lost in the Twilight Zone and I thought it was all over in the Zone of the Enders.

 

[Qwurty2.0]

The second link made me laugh.

Just saying! >.>

 

[Onjenae]

omfg im tired of you guys posting the same topicw over and over again lol


honestly you so called nice guys who get rejected just need to learn to deal with rejection like normal human beings is that so hrad to ask and yes this thread title was very misleading.

 

[00slash00]

omfg im tired of you guys posting the samer topic over nad over again lol


honestly you so called nice guys who get rejected just need to learn to deal with rejection like normal human beings is that so ahrd to ask and yes this thread title was very misleading.

would you suggest a different title to make it less misleading?

 

[00slash00]

If you wanted to end the debate why did you make a new thread instead of posting in the old one?


EDIT Misleading indeed.

id like to make the title as clear as possible. what would you suggest to make it less misleading?

 

[Total LOLige]

omfg im tired of you guys posting the same topicw over and over again lol


honestly you so called nice guys who get rejected just need to learn to deal with rejection like normal human beings is that so hrad to ask and yes this thread title was very misleading.

Bro, this isn't a friendzone rant.

OT: I enjoy the friendzone threads always an interesting an funny read. I can see how they get annoying.

 

[Daystar Clarion]

Here, let me end the friendzone debate: yall need to stop being a bunch of sad dudes and man the fuck up. I never got friendzoned and I am far from being a handsome, extremely sexual big dicked ************.

Getting friendzoned is something you let happen. I have never seen anyone get friendzoned without acting like a coward, for lack of a better word. ************, you dont want to get friendzoned? Let the chick know you wont put up with that shit. Problem solved.

But of course this shit is to much to ask, bitches will keep friendzoning motherfuckers left and right and these motherfuckers will keep spamming the internet instead of telling the ***** what she is.

I actually have to say though, I cant remember seeing more than 4 friendzone threads in my time here. Its almost like us escapists know how to handle this shit, more so than other communities anyway.

http://www.eatliver.com/img/2011/7783.jpg

Fuck that comic. A more accurate portrayal of 99% of friendzoning incidents would be the guy applying for the role of janitor while thinking to himself he would like to be the manager. Then he bitches when he gets the janitor job.

I mean, Jesus Christ people.

Yeah, I gotta agree with Smash here.

Guys get friendzoned because they're not interesting.

Want to know how I started my relationship with my significant other?

I was funny. I made her laugh. I didn't shower her with compliments, I didn't tell her how special she was, I treated her like I treated any of my male friends.

Like a human being.

A flawed, beautiful, human being.

 

[geK0]

It's not so much a debate as it is a long, irritating whine : \

 

[Daystar Clarion]

It's not so much a debate as it is a long, irritating whine : \

'Why don't girls like meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?'

'Because you're boring'

'But I'm a nice guy.'

'Sorry, but being completely inoffensive =/= being a nice guy.'

 

[aegix drakan_v1legacy]

Man, I don't know about the Friend Zone, I can't seem to get out of the Danger Zone.

I just got through the Green Hill Zone, got lost in the Twilight Zone and I thought it was all over in the Zone of the Enders.

You know, I think whoever set that chain of Zones up in succession like that REALLY should get a stern talking to about 'Zoning regulations' by the local building inspector.

Seriously, that's not proper level progression. They should be ashamed.

Plus, they skipped the FroZone! Unnacceptable! Every game needs an ice level!

OT:
The friendzone exists, but...If you end up there, maybe you should have shown some interest before you got shunted there?

I mean, my Girlfriend and I (been together over a year now) started off as just friends who met up between university classes, and sometimes ate together. I had no intent of pursuing her. I treated her just like any other friend, and we got along awesomely.

And then I fell for her, and dropped a hint or two. And then started giving her REAL goodbye hugs rather than our usual split second goodbye hugs. And so, I showed her I was interested. And she felt the same. BAM, we hooked up.

I was funny. I made her laugh. I didn't shower her with compliments, I didn't tell her how special she was, I treated her like I treated any of my male friends.

Like a human being.

A flawed, beautiful, human being.

This is pretty much how it goes. That's how I treated it, and it worked pretty well for me.

 

[senordesol]

There's a debate on whether the 'Friend Zone' exists? Are there some diehard flat earthers around as well?

Okay maybe I'm being a tad harsh. As I understand it (and I should, via personal experience), the 'friend zone' is when a girl rebuffs or otherwise renders moot the romantic advances of a guy (or girl -why not?) while ostensibly desiring to 'remain friends'. This becomes genuinely frustrating for (so-called) nice guys who have bothered to nurture a consistent, stable, and -hitherto- platonic relationship with a girl they are interested in/have grown to fancy over time. It is particularly frustrating when the object of their affections consistently (is perceived to be) running off with scoundrels (or otherwise 'undesirables' in the eyes of the unrequited).

To say that one is not 'able to deal with rejection' may be true in the strictest definition of the phrase, but I think the gravity of precisely whom is doing the rejecting is lost in that dismissal. This isn't some random bar skank or internet/introduced-via-friend date; this is someone they've grown to care about -someone whose opinion carries substantial weight with them. To propose a more intimate relationship -and to have that proposal not only rejected, but to continue as if nothing has changed- is a pretty shattering blow to one's ego. And let's be clear here: everyone has an ego, and how others affect one's ego informs their relationship with them.

Now what I'm NOT saying is that women don't have the right to outright reject anyone they don't have feelings for, NOR that anyone is a bad/mean/cruel person for 'friendzoning' someone. And there is a right way and a wrong way to handle it. Some can 'take the hit' and suck it up. Sometimes moving on is the best way to handle it (i.e. an 'amicable split'). Unrequited love is one thing, outright rejection is quite another; the constant reminder of such (particularly if he really, really cares about you) may be too cruel a circumstance for him to operate 'normally' under.

Now, it is also possible that some guys have a certain...let's say...'expectation' from female 'friends'. Wherein they figure if they let her cry on their shoulder enough, she'll eventually realize that they are a viable a prospective mate. Perhaps they hope that -with enough interaction- she'll see past his mighty girth, horrendous acne, crippling insecurities, or any number of individual 'deal breakers'. After all, isn't every romance movie ever about overcoming some initial 'hurdle' to ultimately arrive at the love that was 'meant to be all along'? (I don't care if you claim to not watch romance movies, you know I'm right) Just so, a constant inundation with such flights of fancy will color one's perspective over time, and may set up certain expectations that -while unfair to their would-be partner- will only lead to disappointment (and likely a fair degree of resentment). So you'll notice I just used the word 'unfair' to describe such expectations, because that's what it is: unfair. However, the all-encompassing feeling of worthlessness after a rejection (or -even worse- an unending stream of rejection) by people who find him wanting as a mate but adequate for a friend is truly maddening.

In truth, most would probably rather be rejected totally and subsequently shunned, than offered the 'silver medal' of 'let's just stay friends'. The former hurts less.

 

[Andy Shandy]

Man, I don't know about the Friend Zone, I can't seem to get out of the Danger Zone.

I just got through the Green Hill Zone, got lost in the Twilight Zone and I thought it was all over in the Zone of the Enders.

No Safari Zone, Comix Zone or FroZone for that matter? For shame =P

But anyway, if you're put in this "friend zone" then it's probably due to something you have or haven't done.

 

[Blobpie]

Man, I don't know about the Friend Zone, I can't seem to get out of the Danger Zone.

I just got through the Green Hill Zone, got lost in the Twilight Zone and I thought it was all over in the Zone of the Enders.

Then when you were done with that you had to zone out while watching the zone while you were on a airplane to the Korean demilitarized zone, while being on a zone diet just as the moment you changed time zones.

 

[Keoul]

Guys get friendzoned because they're not interesting.

This ^
You can be the nicest guy in the world but unless they find you interesting, a real reason to go out with you, then getting friend zoned is about as far as you'll go.
My guess on the whole "girls go out with assholes" theory is because assholes are confident therefore interesting while the "nice guys" seem shy, boring and not someone you'd fall in love with

 

[Raven's Nest]

Man, I don't know about the Friend Zone, I can't seem to get out of the Danger Zone.

I just got through the Green Hill Zone, got lost in the Twilight Zone and I thought it was all over in the Zone of the Enders.

Hiiiiiiighwaaay tooooo therrr danger zoune!

ahem... i'll leave now...