how do I tell my girlfriend I play videogames and how get her to enjoy them with me

[FireDr@gon]

I know how sexist this is but get something cute and harmless like Pikmin or the aforementioned Lego games. Trying to set the hook using Gears of War is not your best option with most women.

I may have to disagree with that as most girls that i know that love gaming would be frankly patronised by that opinion and those games.

Find out what she's into and go for that, if she's into slipknot, she's not gunna mind a SAW game...

 

[Lim3]

Don't bother to try to explain video games to her. My GF doesn't understand. My gaming buddies GF doesn't understand. We've tried and failed.

Better to live and let live.

 

[FireDr@gon]

My personal rule is if I can replace the phrase 'gaming' with 'jerking off' in a sentence and it sounds weird then it's time to lay off the gaming a bit.

"I had a free afternoon and my coursework was in so I spent an afternoon jerking off and met up with mates later" alright...if a bit personal.

"I dumped my girlfriend because she objected to the amount of time I spent jerking off"...umm.

"Honestly I would rather jerk off than socialise with people" NO!
.

hahaha not only fantastic but i suppose it works for any vice, like weed!

 

[figday]

dont force her. just tell her that you like video games. and keep your schedules right ^^

 

[Kiroy]

If she ever tells you to stop playing videogames straight out. Dump her.

 

[KarlMonster]

One GF was already playing City of Heroes on the PC. I happened to get a trial month in CoH with some Steam Pack deal or other, so we played CoH pretty frequently for that month. It was really great to spend that kind of time with her with full voice chat and all that. When the month was over I was totally bored with CoH. She didn't care for shooters so I looked around for co-op games that weren't shooters. Unfortunately, I didn't find much of interest, which is unfortunate. It was a lot of fun to play together.

My current GF doesn't play videogames - yet. She is a total nut for Star Wars so it may be inevitable. If I can install Tie Fighter (DOSBOX) on her laptop, it will be a done deal.

HOWEVER! It is very important that you do not try to force her into your hobby. Especially early on in the relationship. Current GF is trying to get me into her hobby. I'm willing to support her hobby, but I do bristle at the idea of one person's hobby being a 'deal breaker.' If you have common interests, it is much more important that you develop the early relationship based on that common ground.

 

[FireDr@gon]

Good point, work on your strengths early on and let each other be individuals.

Know this though - women hate being ignored! Make sure you spend plenty of time with her and give her the attention she craves!

 

[Rhedd]

Oh god, how could I forget Fable 2, that was the first game my gf played all the way through, she loved the dog, customising her character, decision making: eveything. Plus it's rediculously easy, and I could jump in and out to help as her 'faithful bodyguard' lol.

Also, The Escapist can actually help. My gf loves films so I started watching moviebob while she was round, then Yahtzee, which she couldn't really follow, but the humour had her practically wetting herself, and then Extra Credits started some interesting discussions without forcing them.

 

[mrscott137]

Okay, tell her first off, don't make a big deal of it and see if she wants to play any SINGLE player games. Don't use FPS- the controls are too tricky for new gamers, or a complicated interface. Start with something like Little Big Planet, Heavy Rain, or other simple controls on the easiest difficulty. If you do move onto FPS or otherwise 'complicated' games, use something with as few elements and people as possible, not a great war simulator, something like halo- just shoot the aliens. I know this from experience- the interface and controls will be the biggest barrier if you want to get her involved. Good luck

 

[EeveeElectro]

Maybe start with something on the Wii, that's usually fun to play with others. If she's up for it, maybe suggest a fighting game like Tekken or Soul Calibur? They're quite fun and not too hard. (If you have two controllers that is.) Just tell her the basic moves. Or just tell her to button bash. And go easy on her for the first few tries, so she feels awesome when she kicks your arse.

Or if she's not into games, she's not into them and there's nothing you can do about it. I'm sure there's other things yo have in common.

EDIT: I forgot, don't let it consume your relationship. Just do it now and again, unlike me and my ex. Whenever he came round all we did was play/talk about games. Got stale very quickly.

 

[fbdbh]

Well, I didn't hide my gaming habits. Every once in a while I leave the game running by the time she arrives, and say something like: "wait, I'll just quit", and if no reaction, I quit, but sometimes she says something like: "wait a minute, that's interesting". That's how she reacted to Machinarium or Portal.

 

[ultimateownage]

I found a new girlfriend (yay) sadly she doesn't videogames (crap).Thruogh she's nuetral on the subject gaming is a BIG part of my life and I want her to be a part of it.So simply answer the questions above and hopefully i'll have a girlfriend next week.

Yeah I always hate it when they don't videogames. But if she's nuetral on the subject then maybe it might be okay.
Dude, just say you play video games. It's not like coming out of the fucking closet. Spend less time fretting on it and more time improving your English and sentence structure.

 

[TilMorrow]

oh, btw, cause everyone else said it, this would usually belong in the advice fo-- no, I can't say that, I feel like I'm being rude... Post here all you want man I'll reply to it no matter the forum

But this is the gaming discussion forum. and it seems more suited for the advice forum...

OT: I can't quite understand what the OP meant in his post. You said you "found a new girlfriend" but then said that you'd "hopefully have a new girlfriend next week". Whut? Also you said "she doesn't videogames". Does she not like them or just not play them? And you- ah doesn't matter I'll just answer your thread question.

If you have only just started going out with her than I suggest you don't force your hobby on her. Also as you said she is neutral on the subject I'm guessing you asked her something relating to games so I think she already knows you like to play them. Go out with her for awhile then slowly introduce her with a fun easy and graphically nice and friendly looking game so she might be persuaded to keep playing with you. Also be mindful of what she wants, maybe she just doesn't want to play games.

 

[Kenny3k]

You could point out that the controller vibrates.

this^

 

[Jynx_lucky_j]

You know, I've never seen anyone ask for advice on how to tell people that they are a sports fan, or that they are musicians. In both these case nobody even worries if their significant other shares their hobby or not. Playing video games isn't even that unusual, chances are all her past boyfriends played games too.

I play table top RPGs, such as Dungeons & Dragons. When I and my wife first started dating the topic came up of what we like to do for fun. I told her I play video games, read, I'm into computers, 3D animation, and on the weekend I play Dungeons & Dragons. Now I did have some concern in revealing that I was a HUGE nerd. However I also knew that if she decided that she didn't like me because of my interests it wasn't going to work out in the long term regardless. Lucky for me when I said D&D, she perked up and said she had always been kind of interested in RPGs but never had an opportunity to play them. She never did become more that a casual player, but things certainly worked out. We also have many hobbies we don't share however. She never did show to be overly interested in computers or 3D animation, and I really don't like writing like she does. That okay though, some things we do together somethings we do together somethings we do on our own. Its normal

 

[harvz]

Or you can just play your games like usual. Just don't try and force it on her. Chances are, if she sees you playing a game and she is interested, she will ask to have a go herself. Don't try and force things on other people if they aren't interested, it's a sure fire way to piss them off and eventually they will avoid you for it. Just be glad you have a girl who is okay with the fact that you play games.

or you could try the direct approach, tie her down and force her...

seriously though, check her facebook/computer, statistically she should have at least tried farm ville or bejeweled, possibly solitaire.
all im saying is that you may be able to find a game (casual, though it may be) that she may be interested in and you can play together, if she's not interested, back off or you may find yourself a little lonely

 

[valkeminator]

I suggest not to force her into video gaming, make it be your thing, and if she doesnt want to know about it then let her be. No one likes being forced to enjoy something they dont like. There's no problem from being a boyfriend who's gaming, besides my rule of thumb would be to tolerate and respect each other. If you or she can't then maybe you or she are just not compatible.

If she can tolerate and she's cool with it then that's good
If she can't then, well too bad, it might not going to last long.
Same thing with you:
If you can't tolerate some of her activities then too bad, not gonna work again.

Basically its about getting used with each other's flaw.

 

[BiscuitTrouser]

I found a new girlfriend (yay) sadly she doesn't videogames (crap).Thruogh she's nuetral on the subject gaming is a BIG part of my life and I want her to be a part of it.So simply answer the questions above and hopefully i'll have a girlfriend next week.

So? I really like cinema. It doesnt matter at all. I also really like books. Show her games like pikmin or portal that a really easy to pick up and play and dont involve childish killing and gore. My girlfriend doesnt like gaming that much. I dont like church that she goes to. We dont really care to be honest, sometimes she watches me play bioshock though. Whenever you talk about "gaming" like its some mega dark secret replace it with "reading books" or "watching movies" and see how stupid you sound. It doesnt matter.

 

[HalfChance]

Why is it such a big deal that you play video games? I didn't think that would warrant a "We need to talk" talk.