How do you date?

[ZombieSuicide]

I was just pondering this lately, what's your "go to" form of dating? Online dating? Dating apps like Tinder? Actually meeting people in public places like bars or book stores or whatever?

I'm not too successful at any of it actually. I've been single for a good two years now and I have to say I'm just utter crap at dating people I don't know. Online dating I just read endless profiles and message people I think I have something in common with only to get no response back. Tinder is just a jumbled mess of shallow people (I count myself here) and bots trying to scam you for a quick buck. And I'm just not good at talking to people in bars. Don't get me wrong, this isn't a sob story, I'm just realizing I'm pretty bad at this and I dunno, maybe some people hear have better ideas for me to try out, hahaha!

 

[soren7550]

I don't, since I managed to chase away the one person that could and would love me & that I could actually manage being around, with my stupid circling self hatred and poverty.

(why yes, I am fun at parties)

 

[Prime_Hunter_H01]

Wait and hope some girl that I am interested also happens to be interested in my and is willing to be the instigator since I'm too shy to do it myself.

Its.. uh... inefficient to say the least

(Mind if I steal this)

 

[Casual Shinji]

I've never been on a date my whole life (yes, that's a whopping 32 years of no dates) so I wouldn't know.

Beyond having the courage of mollusc, when I think about having to tell a girl about myself (interests, job, home situation) I would fucking die of embarrassment.

 

[DayDark]

You meet people at grocery stores, supermarkets, library, or a night in town, school, hobby places.

when it comes to dating, my go to is either coffee at some inexpensive place, a walk in the park, or a movie at my place.

 

[PsychicTaco115]

I've been using online dating in the past and it's been alright

Now I've been more confident in going up in person so that's good

So pretty successful if I do say so myself

Single now and ready to

 

[GrumbleGrump]

Too much lack of self-steem around these parts! Allow me to show everyone how it's done and... Add to the low self-steem.

I don't date. That's the short of it. It just scares me and I don't have any woman that genuinely interests me in my life. I actually find it very possible that I won't meet anyone, ever.

 

[soren7550]

Wait and hope some girl that I am interested also happens to be interested in my and is willing to be the instigator since I'm too shy to do it myself.

Its.. uh... inefficient to say the least

(Mind if I steal this)

Go nuts, it'll throw people off my sent for stealing it first.

 

[Fieldy409_v1legacy]

Ive been trying but it never seems to quite work. Tinder was full of promise but everything ends up with the conversations trailing off. I had one woman actually agree to meet me for coffee but she put me off twice and I ended up spitting the dummy over it(Its incredibly dissapointing to be put off for a date) telling her she clearly didnt want to meet me and cut off communication.

Though that is the closest Ive got to an actual date so maybe there is something to this Tinder, Its just too bad I dont live in a big city with more potential contacts.

So after that dissapointment Ive pretty much said fuck it, Im going to work on myself and try to improve myself, lose some weight, study more. Women can come after me when if they want to instead of me going after them. I dont have the energy for this anymore.

 

[Sleepy Sol]

Very carefully.

[sub][small]read: not at all[/small][/sub]

I've had long-distance relationships, but I'm not sure how I'd do on a date. I'm really awful at real-life communication most of the time, but I can do pretty well if I hit it off very well with somebody. No advice to really offer you, OP. It's not something I've worried about recently. I wouldn't put off trying out online dating either as a meet-up service or some other method of trying out dating/a relationship, though. Do what works for you.

 

[Jack Action]

Dating's one of those real life things that involves contact with actual people, right?

Why would anyone wanna do that? It eats into your gaming time.

 

[MysticSlayer]

Like this:
1. Get to know a lot of girls.
2. Want to start dating one of them.
3. Let her know about your feelings.
4. Get rejected.
5. Take comfort in the fact that you have a lot of good friends due to #1.

 

[ZombieSuicide]

Oh wow this is an eye opener. I seriously didn't think it was this bad out there. I feel bad for suggesting this topic now... I'll think of a happier one next time. I am really okay with being single, I just want to meet new people and potentially date. I'm pretty much doing just that, I just found that online, I suck. I have had much better luck meeting people through coed sports leagues that require very little (if any) physical skill or effort. Oh yeah and Tinder is difficult to meet people off of, I've managed it 3 times in about 8 (?) months. It's bad out there, I think I'll stick to Fallout NV and Planet of the Apes movies for now D:

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

I met my girlfriend online, but I don't have a go-to method.

 

[MajorTomServo]

I tend to not. I freak the fuck out internally whenever I talk to a girl, it's not fun. "YOU'RE GONNA BLOW IT. SHE HATES YOU. SHE THINKS YOU'RE A CREEP! NO SHE DOESN'T, SHE CLEARLY LIKES YOU! DON'T FLATTER YOURSELF, WHY WOULD SHE LIKE YOU? DUDE, JUST GO FOR IT! BUT WHAT IF SHE'S CRAZY? OR, LIKE, A WHITE SUPREMACIST OR SOMETHING?! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THIS GIRL, WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO HER?!" And so on.

I've tried online dating in the past, but whenever I get messages, I'm too nervous to respond right away. So I put it off, then forget, then my "acceptable response time" window closes. Once this happens three or so times, I delete my profile and try again in another year when the pool of women has changed or forgotten about Mr. No-reply McGee.

One of these days I may just message a woman back.

 

[YeOldeMoose]

I met my first girlfriend in high school. We had lunch together and it was pretty obvious that we were both attracted to each other. I met my second girlfriend when a mutual friend of ours invited us both out to the same church one Sunday morning. I met my current girlfriend because she is younger student in the same program as me in college. She attended a lot of the events that I put on for several organizations that I help lead.

All in all, its about feeling confident in yourself and going for it. If a girl is not interested in you, and that does happen, well, that's just unfortunate. Chalk that girl up as just a friend and start looking for the next person you are interested in dating.

 

[Eddie the head]

Like this:
1. Get to know a lot of girls.
2. Want to start dating one of them.
3. Let her know about your feelings.
4. Get rejected.
5. Take comfort in the fact that you have a lot of good friends due to #1.

I just get stuck on the first step. I would rather have friends then a girlfriend anyway.

 

[Ryallen]

Never had one. Tried once. Told a girl that I liked her. She said okay. Sucked really badly. Few months later, and I managed to apologize to her, she accepted, and we were sorta friends again. About a year after that, however, I tried making her laugh a few times by staring at her intently like she did occasionally, and once that went on for a few weeks, she told me that I made her uncomfortable. So I started ignoring her outright. Not acknowledging that she spoke to me, never saying her name, not once ever referencing her existence. And we were in marching band together, so that was really awkward when others were around, or when we were sitting in the same space for extended periods of time.

Basically, it went so far south that it hit the South Pole, and then kept going a bit. Haven't seen her since she left to be homeschooled, so about two years. I could contact her, but if I ever apologized, I'd rather it be in person, but since that's never gonna happen, I basically go down in her memory as an asshole.

 

[Evil Moo]

My technique of never leaving the house and systematically losing contact with all of my friends has yielded no results so far. I'll keep you guys posted if anything changes in that regard.

 

[Fijiman]

I'm too busy playing video games to date anyone.