How do you flirt (in a way that works)?

[bodyklok]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENchZIW5igQ&feature=PlayList&p=03764773CAC54791&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=42

It actually works!

 

[Flying Dagger]

all these people talking about the do you like magic line from how i met your mother and no one realised i've already linked it...

here we go - this sums up all flirting

http://www.vimeo.com/1166717

http://www.vimeo.com/1166786

 

[Uncompetative]

"Flirting" in general is playing a psychological game. You're acting normally, while inviting further contact. From there, it's whether or not she bites. All you can do is bait and cast the hook, everything else is whether or not she takes.

Beyond that, just be yourself. If you can't find people who like you for you, then don't look.

This is true, but there are all sort of webs one can weave and lures to dangle. It can be hellishly fun to play with people in such a way, especially when they know you're manipulating them and can do their best to return the favour. A fun time is had all around. There might even be sex in it.

Wrong, wrong, wrong. I'm sorry, but I completely disagree with this approach.

Be refreshingly cordial, don't play games. The reason that a 'null action' can attract is because just about every guy out there is showing himself up as a dick with a tongue. Simply by not being one of them will lead you to some positive contact where the opposite party relates to you and there is some foundation for you both to find out something about each other as people.

Bear in mind with the conventional approach (e.g. "bait and cast the hook", "It can be hellishly fun to play with people in such a way, especially when they know you're manipulating them and can do their best to return the favour"), that after you have achieved your primary goal of a full body orgasm (for the other person, yourself, or all participants involved), you will probably end up talking to them only to find out just how dull they are to be around 24/7.

 

[MoganFreeman]

Don't show interest until they first show interest.

Great advice... for people who want to die as virgins.

I wouldn't give advice that I didn't know to work. What do you think is wrong with what I said?

Because 8 out of 10 chicks like to be picked up. And those other 2? Well chances are they aren't going to be actively aggressive towards nerds. Most girls like that guys show interest. Telling this guy not to show interest first truly is asking him to probably die a virgin.

The only method that works is to keep trying. You'll get rejected lots, but eventually you'll get comfortable in your skin, you'll have built up some confidence, and you'll start to understand what you need to do to pick up girls.

I didn't mean for him to ignore the girl, just for him not to make it painfully obvious that he wants to jump her bones the minute he walks over.

 

[ace_of_something]

I beat the ever loving snot out of someone smaller and weaker than me. Instant chicks.

 

[TopHatTim]

yeah
i seem to have that thing around me where im super funny to everyone.
idk why
usually im being 100% serious.
but thats my main way of getting the ladies.

 

[Frizzle]

Just make it seem like you're there (wherever it is) to have a good time, and you want to include her in it. If she's already laughing, then bring something to the table that can keep it going. If you don't make them feel like you're trying to pick them up, it'll work most of the time. It's best if you do this in an open area bar. People like to be around fun people.

If a girl looks like she's not having fun, and she's by herself, make her time fun there.
Ask her why the hell she came out if she isnt' going to have a good time. If you phrase it right, it'll go over very well.

 

[Gitsnik]

There was that epic post further up about the plan, the initial scouting etc. and I really like that (indeed used to use almost exactly those procedures - it becomes second nature). I want to add one thing that can go really badly if you screw it up (i.e. not for the amateur).

Insult random people.

Ok I should quantify that a bit - pick girls that she's previously given a look of disgust (or guys), or that you think she would feel not-so-pretty next to. And eviscerate them. The trick here is two or threefold. First, you have to pick girls that are not her friends (evidence is important!), Second, you have to insult combinations - don't just say "omg bad shoes" coz she might have exactly the same pair at home. And Third (this is the most difficult part), you have to play off her own "fashion sense" in comparison "My god those shoes with that shirt are fucking awful, we should get her over here to look at you so she can learn some freaking fashion sense" is an old faithful of mine - the trick is making it not seem too sleazy (a little seems to be ok... I don't know why).

It breaks the ice, if you do it right it makes her laugh, and coupled it with solid movements* and the right preparation for the situation, and it'll work every time.

*Solid movements are broad, sharp gestures. You say "My God!" and you throw your arms up in the air, you point at a pair of shoes with a big dumb "WOW" look on your face, lean back to full arm extension and say (never yell) "crap look at that for bad taste".

Actually describing that sounds dumb as hell, so maybe you should never try it without seeing it happen.

Also go dig up a copy of the book "body language". It's old and has a yellow cover, more than that I can't say - find out any bad habits you have and eliminate them. Good for job interviews too (which I flirt my ass off in when there is a female around).

 

[dwightsteel]

Don't show interest until they first show interest.

Great advice... for people who want to die as virgins.

I wouldn't give advice that I didn't know to work. What do you think is wrong with what I said?

Because 8 out of 10 chicks like to be picked up. And those other 2? Well chances are they aren't going to be actively aggressive towards nerds. Most girls like that guys show interest. Telling this guy not to show interest first truly is asking him to probably die a virgin.

The only method that works is to keep trying. You'll get rejected lots, but eventually you'll get comfortable in your skin, you'll have built up some confidence, and you'll start to understand what you need to do to pick up girls.

I didn't mean for him to ignore the girl, just for him not to make it painfully obvious that he wants to jump her bones the minute he walks over.

Again, though, at least in my experience, and especially for guys who aren't "traditionally" handsome, most girls aren't gonna give the coveted second glance until you do something to earn it. The way I see it, the whole thing is a game, and in this game, more often then not, guys have to make the first move.

 

[MoganFreeman]

Don't show interest until they first show interest.

Great advice... for people who want to die as virgins.

I wouldn't give advice that I didn't know to work. What do you think is wrong with what I said?

Because 8 out of 10 chicks like to be picked up. And those other 2? Well chances are they aren't going to be actively aggressive towards nerds. Most girls like that guys show interest. Telling this guy not to show interest first truly is asking him to probably die a virgin.

The only method that works is to keep trying. You'll get rejected lots, but eventually you'll get comfortable in your skin, you'll have built up some confidence, and you'll start to understand what you need to do to pick up girls.

I didn't mean for him to ignore the girl, just for him not to make it painfully obvious that he wants to jump her bones the minute he walks over.

Again, though, at least in my experience, and especially for guys who aren't "traditionally" handsome, most girls aren't gonna give the coveted second glance until you do something to earn it. The way I see it, the whole thing is a game, and in this game, more often then not, guys have to make the first move.

Yes, the whole thing is a game.
Yes, you do have to earn her interest.
Yes, as a man, it is more often than not your job to initiate things.

I never said you didn't have to do all that.

But, you can do all of those things with out making it plain and clear that you are interested in the girl. And if you can do those things while not spelling out for her exactly how interested you are, you will be much more successful.



And I never said you had to be traditionally handsome either.

 

[dwightsteel]

Don't show interest until they first show interest.

Great advice... for people who want to die as virgins.

I wouldn't give advice that I didn't know to work. What do you think is wrong with what I said?

Because 8 out of 10 chicks like to be picked up. And those other 2? Well chances are they aren't going to be actively aggressive towards nerds. Most girls like that guys show interest. Telling this guy not to show interest first truly is asking him to probably die a virgin.

The only method that works is to keep trying. You'll get rejected lots, but eventually you'll get comfortable in your skin, you'll have built up some confidence, and you'll start to understand what you need to do to pick up girls.

I didn't mean for him to ignore the girl, just for him not to make it painfully obvious that he wants to jump her bones the minute he walks over.

Again, though, at least in my experience, and especially for guys who aren't "traditionally" handsome, most girls aren't gonna give the coveted second glance until you do something to earn it. The way I see it, the whole thing is a game, and in this game, more often then not, guys have to make the first move.

Yes, the whole thing is a game.
Yes, you do have to earn her interest.
Yes, as a man, it is more often than not your job to initiate things.

I never said you didn't have to do all that.

But, you can do all of those things with out making it plain and clear that you are interested in the girl. And if you can do those things while not spelling out for her exactly how interested you are, you will be much more successful.



And I never said you had to be traditionally handsome either.

explain this to me. How do you earn her interest without letting her know you're interested?
"Hi. I'm a super cool interesting guy. But I'm not interested in you in the least. I'm just talking to you because you're here. I would have talked to you if you were an ugly dude, but you happen to be an attractive chick, not that I'd notice, because I'm not interested."

If you're talking to a chick that you don't normally associate yourself with, she will usually up and assume there is an interest. If there wasn't, why would you be talking to her? Besides, on the off track that she assumes you're just being "friendly", you're buying yourself a one way ticket into the friendzone. A place of no return for most. I've certainly never been with a chick after we were "friends".

Girls don't get offended that you've taken an interest, unless she's an extreme feminist, lesbian. She'll usually be flattered, even if her feelings are unrequited.

 

[GPScorpio]

Wolfshirt [http://www.birkoph.com/Wolftshirt.htm], you would not believe the pussy I pull in this thing.