Long story short, I'm going through a bit of a rough patch in my life right now and I'm having a hard time staying optimistic about things. I was wondering if anyone out there has any tips or anything to share about this subject.
How do you maintain a positive outlook in a seemingly hopeless situation.
- Thread starter Rassmusseum
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Ya know, we can expect some damn good hockey games in two months. Rough pathces come and go, and they suck, for some of us more than the others.
A good distraction always helps. But don't go for one distraction for too long, find another one soon, because the moment a distraction becomes part of a lifestyle, your mind will start nagging you again. So do whatever the hell you want with your free time; go out, take a walk, pick up a hobby, write, read, look for a job, anything, just don't sit around the place and feel sorry for yourself. Sure some alone time is a good thing, but medicine needs to be taken carefully and in small dosage.
A good distraction always helps. But don't go for one distraction for too long, find another one soon, because the moment a distraction becomes part of a lifestyle, your mind will start nagging you again. So do whatever the hell you want with your free time; go out, take a walk, pick up a hobby, write, read, look for a job, anything, just don't sit around the place and feel sorry for yourself. Sure some alone time is a good thing, but medicine needs to be taken carefully and in small dosage.
It's education--college isn't going too well right now. I think one of my biggest problems is that I'm feeling overwhelmed. For example, I've got 3 midterms this week and I feel like there's no way I can do well on them. I'm gonna try to focus on the small picture for awhile and just take one thing at a time.
Overall though, just seeing these words of encouragement are uplifting and I'm grateful for them. I'll post back here at the end of the week when it's all done to let you know how things went.
Overall though, just seeing these words of encouragement are uplifting and I'm grateful for them. I'll post back here at the end of the week when it's all done to let you know how things went.
Take care of yourself. Pamper yourself. Do the things you like to do - take a bath, eat your favorite foods, spend a little money, and as always, play video games.
The most important thing to remember is to give yourself a break every once in awhile. You're not perfect - no one is. Don't punish yourself for things that have already happened. What's done is done, and hating on yourself only wastes time and energy.
Another thing I do to calm myself down is to play the "then what?" game.
If you fail your midterms, then what? Answer the question, then keep asking yourself "then what?" until you can go no more. At the end, you'll see that the world isn't over and you're not dead.
The most important thing to remember is to give yourself a break every once in awhile. You're not perfect - no one is. Don't punish yourself for things that have already happened. What's done is done, and hating on yourself only wastes time and energy.
Another thing I do to calm myself down is to play the "then what?" game.
If you fail your midterms, then what? Answer the question, then keep asking yourself "then what?" until you can go no more. At the end, you'll see that the world isn't over and you're not dead.
This might sound lame, but sometimes a trip to the school's guidance councillor could help/prevent a lot of damage. About a year ago, I panicked at the very mention of a deadline after going through a particularly intense internship. Eventually, I realised it wasn't working this way, so I went to see my GP (At that point I was already displaying physical symptoms like severe headaches and anxiety attacks) and they referred me to a guidance councillor at school who then helped me get in touch with a phychologist. It wasn't some intens asylum-y kind of thing, just a chat once a week for an hour to change some baf habits people over time. In hindsight, I think that if I'd gone earlier, I wouldn't have had to skip one entire module, which caused a bit of delay in my studies.Rassmusseum said:
Otherwise, try to set a structured schedule for yourself. You work from 9 to 5, after that, you've done all you can and then it's best to relax. If it ain't happening, don't force it, that usually only make things worse.
First of all try very hard about NOT thinking about your problems. The more you brood on the the worse you will feel. Also you could probably spend that time doing something constructive. Also act happy. Even if you don;t feel happy act happy. This can actually trick the brain into thinking you really ARE happy. Strange but true. And as others have said tyr and distract yourself/do things that make you feel good. Hope you situation improves Rassmusseum.
Ah, the joys of education.Rassmusseum said:
I am assuming "midterms" are an examination in your country?
Okay, make yourself a deal. You will study for X amount of time, and once you have done that, you will reward yourself. Study hard, but don't burn yourself out. If you push yourself too hard you will just make yourself even more stressed, and that's not going to help (unless you are the kind of person to thrive on pressure, but it doesn't sound like you are).
Try not to beat yourself up too much about them. Examinations are important, yes, but they are not the end of the world either. Try your best, accept that you have done so, and if you don't get the result you were hoping for, promise to start revising for the exams earlier when you re-take them.
One of the hardest lessons I learnt was that things are never as "make or break" as they seem to be when you are in education. Friendships, examinations, relationships, they always seem so much more world changing than they truly are.
So to re-iterate: Try hard, but don't push yourself so much you get stressed. Make sure to give yourself time to relax as well, it's important not to be too highly strung. If you don't do as well as you hoped, don't beat yourself up, but try and practice earlier next time.
Best of luck, and of course, remember that we are only giving our own advice, you are perfectly free to ignore it.
Considering I deal with seemingly hopeless situations about 10 times a fucking day (hooray for my screwed up brain) the best advice I can give is talk to someone.
Anyone you feel you can trust. It helps. It helped me when I felt like there was no way out.
whatever you're going through it will get better in time. It might get better before it gets worse, but it will get better.
Anyone you feel you can trust. It helps. It helped me when I felt like there was no way out.
whatever you're going through it will get better in time. It might get better before it gets worse, but it will get better.
When it comes to coursework the key (for me) was to simply focus on each course at a time. Nothing else. No contemplating my nonexistent future job, no worrying about if anyone gives a shit about me (they don't). Nothing. Time management and personal "owning" of the material is essential.Rassmusseum said:
Once one has the material under ones belt the mid-terms/test/whatnot comes easy. I will assume that likely the stress is coming from a lack of preparedness coming into the situation. The stress sounds like a by-product of being in a situation that requires one to "find points" rather than an exercise in "affording to loose points" resulting in little net effect on your GPA.
My suggestion is to limit or eliminate all social activity and distractions until the work is mastered. Then keep these distractions to a minimum until the semester is complete. Only "you" know, if "you know" the material. It is the core of both confidence and unease.
