how threatened do strangers make you feel?

[Dags90]

It depends on the setting. For first time meetings/random people, I'd consider it prudent to stay in public places. I think I got a ride home from a random classmate twice in my freshman year. First time I ever got a ride in a Porsche.

One time I was on my way to class, and I had just gotten to the end of my street when a woman came out of her house in a suit, and asked if I could take her teenage son to the high school, because she was running late. Needless to say I looked at her like she was speaking in tongues and drove off. It's just not a good idea for me to have a strange teenage boy in my car, especially one that's got over 20 lbs on me. It actually just occurred to me that she possibly assumed I was a classmate of his, which would make the request a lot more understandable. I did see him get in the back of some other car in my rear view mirror though.

If it's not clear from the above, I'm pretty non threatening looking. Young looking, skinny, white. The other day a random woman approached me in a clothing store and asked me my opinion on which jacket her teenage son might prefer, starting with the question "Are you a teenager?"

 

[JaceArveduin]

I'm not afraid, but it doesn't mean I'll trust you either. To quote someone who's significantly better than myself, "Have a plan to kill everyone you meet."

...

Uhh, okay... But maybe not that extreme. But I'd much rather not let someone get the leg up on me if they've got nasty intentions. Call me paranoid if you will.

Nope, you sound about like me. Though it's not really a plan, I tend to leans towards dynamic risk assessment. Stranger's don't make me uncomfortable or threatened, but I don't trust them. Everyone's a bastard, so the nice one's are pleasant surprises.

Of course, people leave me alone, the closest answer I got was back in high school and one of the girls told me I was intimidating. Being a short (and at the time) pudgier guy, I never took that seriously.

 

[lacktheknack]

I got a crew cut a few months ago, and scared black people clean across the street because I looked like a neo-nazi.

So no, I'm not intimidated by strangers, strangers are intimidated by ME.

I don't like it. ;__;

 

[SlaveNumber23]

Depends on the time of day, if its in broad daylight I pretty much have no fear but if its dark and I'm alone I'm going to put my guard up. I'm a fairly paranoid person so I won't ever give a stranger the benefit of the doubt but I don't exactly walk around thinking "oh my god everyone is planning to kill me." I don't really fear strangers but I'm not going to throw my trust around like confetti.

 

[Lady Lucky]

I work overseas alot, I've even been trained to look out for things out of the ordinary in crowds. It all depends on the setting and location.
It also depends on the individual person and what they have been through personally.
Myself, I feel that in general people aren't going to murder you on the spot but you do have to be careful.

 

[Strazdas]

i wouldnt want anyone i met in a bar to follow me home. i can totally understand the girl.
and you did well to stop your friend, she would have though he decided to follow her regardless and possibly ran or even went to cops.

Strangers make me discomforted, but not scared.

 

[Old Father Eternity]

Slightly higher than normal paranoia and a few other quirks aside, *meh* would be the general reaction.
On a general note, the world today had instilled a little too much fear and paranoia into people and that does not help honest travelling folk.

 

[The Lugz]

TL,DR: how paranoid or fearful of strangers are you? are you even fearful of strangers?

call it paranoia or logic, however you please but whenever anyone enters a room i calculate the best way to kill them should i have to

i've never had to, yet.

 

[Eclectic Dreck]

I would not describe my feelings regarding strangers as "fear". I don't fear strangers in that I don't think any of them would intentionally do something that would harm me. That said, I am enormously uncomfortable around strangers and find it difficult to begin an interaction without some structure to force first contact. In a part situation for example, if I don't have someone introduce me around, I tend to simply stick around the people I know best and if no one of that description is present, I tend to just wander off fairly quickly.

 

[Phasmal]

I am cautious of all strangers, especially as a woman and after dark.
Simply because I am realistic.

If said lady had let your friend walk her home and something had happened, the answer would be `Well she shouldn't have let him walk her home`.
It's shitty, but it's how it is.
If the culture is gonna be one of victim blaming, non reporting and tiny conviction rates, you're damn right I'm gonna do everything to ensure nothing happens to me, even if it may offend some strangers.

 

[BiscuitTrouser]

Ive met a lot of lovely strangers. Very many. And ive been mugged only a single occasion. As such i find it very easy to trust strangers. In my ENTIRE life out of the thousands of people ive ever talked to, shopped with, served at work and purchased things from only one (perhaps two) have EVER wished me harm or acted in a way that hurt me. Maybe im just lucky. But honestly this whole "Strangers are BAD PEOPLE!" is a subtle form of arrogance. Obviously YOURE the only saint in society and everyone else is a raging dick hole. No. I refuse to give into such elitism. I have NO reason to believe i am better than those around me and i refuse to treat them with contempt because i do not wish to be treated like that by them.

Granted i WILL shift said view if the person gives me a reason to think that they are shift/suspicious and i most certainly have my guard up at 3 AM in the place i was mugged before. It depends on the circumstance really. During the day ill trust and talk to most strangers without any issue. At night in a busy club im fine with it too. At night in a dark ally... less perhaps.

Im guilty of the subtle sexism that makes me FAR more willing to trust female strangers than male strangers even though im male. I dont think of women as innately better than ME so why do i consider them innately more trustworthy than other men. I know its wrong but i just cant help it.

 

[dyre]

Well, if they're well-groomed and wearing a nice suit or a uniform of some sort, then of course I can trust them! It's those dirty, homeless-looking ones that concern me, and the ones with too-baggy pants.

J/k, but it's probably subconsciously true

 

[370999]

Depends. What are they doing and where are they?

Usually I don't feel that threatened because if you are in a city you won't know the vast amjority of people.

 

[Zack Alklazaris]

Not afraid of strangers at all. Some of my best friends are strangers, and I don't think that someone's out to murder me. Yet. :-D

Thats the way I feel too, I mean what would someone want with me for?

I trust people a little too much which is surprising since I've been hurt in the past. I generally believe most people have good intentions and it lands me in risky behavior now and then.

One time after seeing Deathproof in theaters I found myself stranded. So I walked home, half way there a guy with a broken back window pulled up and said "You look like you could use a ride." I said yes and got in. He proceeded to tell me about how someone broke his window to steal dipers from his car and that seemed true enough considering just last month my suite mate's care was broken into just so they could steal his cassette player. I gave him a few cigarettes for his troubles and he let me off at my apartment.

-shrug- I don't know it seems like some of my most riskiest behavior gives me the greatest rewards. I met my wife online after all. I drove to her apartment 250 miles away without really telling anyone where I was going and spent a week there with only phone calls to back up her story.

According to her that was completely stupid idiotic thing I could of possibly done. That shes lucky she found me because I probably would of been murdered by now.

 

[Zeren]

I have never felt threatened by any stranger. On one of my walks through Downtown Denver, a homeless man was standing on the sidewalk and actively trying to scare anyone who paled past him. He looked like he was having fun, but also looked fairly menacing. When he tried it on me, I simply tipped my hat to him, said "Good day sir" and walked away. He looked very confused that I didn't get scared of him.

 

[Zykon TheLich_v1legacy]

Not threatened at all. In my younger days I was even bigger than I am now, had a shaved head and wore steel toecap boots with combat trousers, Millwall shirt on occasion and generally appeared to be very intimidating, and for a while I was pretty much what I looked like, but as long as you didn't do anything that could be interpreted as a possible hostile action or support the team Millwall were playing that day you'd be OK.

Im guilty of the subtle sexism that makes me FAR more willing to trust female strangers than male strangers even though im male. I dont think of women as innately better than ME so why do i consider them innately more trustworthy than other men. I know its wrong but i just cant help it.

To be fair, male on male violence is far more common than male on female or female on male and the vast majority of crimes are committed by men. You're just playing the numbers. It is unlikely that you will be attacked by a woman because you were looking at her the wrong way or just happened to be in the wrong part of town.

 

[mechashiva77]

I don't trust strange men at all, but only during the night or when I'm alone. During the day and when I'm around people, I'll chat you up like no tomorrow (which is something I should fix sooner or later). I live on a college campus so I have to be careful about these things, but so far I really haven't had anyone come up to me or bother me (because I look and carry myself to look as unattractive as possible). I've had one creepy guy poke me in the side while in class, but a single death glare managed to fix that. Yes, yes, I know it was just a poke but I HATE being touched by people I don't know very well.

Needless to say if a guy were to talk to me at a bar/club/restaurant/street at night, I would try to end the conversation and get away from him as soon as possible. One, I'm in a relationship and I'm trying to give off the idea that I do NOT want to meet anyone else. Sure I could just tell him that I have a boyfriend and you would think he would back off, but what if he says "He doesn't have to know anything"?

Two, our society tends to victim blame a lot. So if anything were to happen to me (provided he gets a hold of me without suffering several kicks to the dick and one of his eyes intact), it would be my fault that I "didn't fight back, wore too revealing clothing, didn't walk with a friend (which is kind of hard to do when you have hardly any),etc." it would be on me that I didn't stop my attacker and he gets away scott-free. So it's like someone said before, I'm going to do everything in my power to protect myself to make sure I don't suffer any blame.