How to destroy an anthill?

[Brandon237]

If you cannot solve a problem with fire or love, why the hell would you want to solve it at all?!

Hmmm new plan:
1. Infiltrate Hive
2. Seduce ant queen
3. ???
4. Profit!

For a more serious answer though I too would like to promote the use of fire to solve all your problems.
ALL OF THEM!

Hmm... if plan fails, you get ant-bites on your wang. If plan succeeds, you get ant-bites on your wang forever! I'm not so sure about this one I like the profit though XD

Hmm, all my violent or non-personal problems anyway Voices in my head don't like being burnt.

All problems... PYROS: Problems Yearly Razed Over Super-incinerators. I think we should found it...

 

[Whateveralot]

Equal parts confectioners sugar and baking soda, put it in a plate near the hill they will find it. It works because ants have no means to pass gas, instead they pop. Worked for me had a problem with carpenter ants once.

Even though it sounds really strange, you say it like it's legitemate. Are you serious? :S

 

[aashell13]

Get a pesticide that's meant to kill ants in the yard. If they're fire ants then amdro and patience should do the trick. usually takes a few days to a week, depending on the size of the mound.

A liberal application of fireworks will be more entertaining, at a possible cost of effectiveness.

 

[mad825]

Boil the kettle or boil water in a sauce pan then pour to one's taste

 

[JochemDude]

Boiling water and poison combined, get a bucket fill it with water then throw a big dosis of poison in it and boil it. Then pour it in and your problems are gone.

 

[Jedoro]

Fire

Pour gasoline/kerosene/lighter fluid/napalm down the hole, then light it. Keep some water handy, in case it spreads too far, but it should get the job done AND be entertaining.

 

[DudeistBelieve]

Have you tried convincing them to leave? All this violence gets nobody amywhere; open negotiations with the ants, and try to understand the issue from their point of view. Dressing up as an ant may help as well.

During the great war of my room with the Ants during 2009, I attempted such negotiations. I would tolerate their presence if the ants respected my computer desk a no-invasion zone. They affronted me on this, and I set about buying traps and glue, capturing prisoners under empty glasses until they starved and left the bodies there as warnings to the others.

Eventually I found their homebase, beteewn the towels under the sink in the master bedroom. Sprayed a can of raid on those fuckers.

Point of the story? Ants are imperialist pinko commie bastards and need to be eliminated.

OT: after trying all that, why not try fire for shits and giggles?

 

[Treaos Serrare]

gasoline and fire, soak the mound in gas then get away from it and chuck some burning old socks at it to catch fire fro ma safe distance, or alternatively make a gas "fuse" line a safe distance fro mthe mound then light it that way( its really fun but be like 10 feet away when you do it)

 

[Saippua]

Kill it with fire. Or dig it up. Then kill it with fire.

 

[Cipher1]

Fire a bunker buster at the damn thing if how ever you don't own a bunker buster go down to your local firework provider purchase an Air bomb place it pointing down the entrance to the anthill light it and find hard cover repeat until inhabitants are no more amongst the living.

 

[Kirosilence]

First you will need to shrink yourself down, you can usually acquire a shrink-ray or chamber from your local mad scientist (If you don't know who that is check the yellow pages, the often disguise themselves as lab techs or gynecologists). You will probably need to pay this man, conventional payment often works but if your local mad scientist is a bit more eccentric then usual he may have arbitrary fetch-tasks for you.

Secondly, you will need armaments. In previous operations I have recommended conventional firepower, but if it's an especially large anthill you may need something a bit more firepower. I recommend a weapon with retrievable/easily acquired and carried ammunition. High powered rifles, or the sought after "Chainsaw Launcher" (Pictured below) are good candidates.

One thing I can not stress enough, MELEE COMBAT WITH ANTS SHOULD ONLY BE CONSIDERED A LAST RESORT! Ants can lift 10-times their body weight and at the size you will be those mandibles will crush you like a beer can between the hand and forehead of John Belushi. If it is necessary, some sort of spear or distance weapon is preferred. Anything to keep you out of the jaws of an angry ant.

The last thing you will need is a EAG or Pheromone Detector, ants communicate by scent, and this will allow you to trace a path through the nest to the queen.

Infiltration will be difficult, one of the most dangerous parts of any anthill operation is entering the hill. Outside you are open to attacks from all ends, once you are underground, the corridors of the ant's lair will allow you to funnel enemies into easy kill-zones. You will need to be quite small, enough to either evade or slip away from your six-legged pursuers. Using the EAG device you should be able to navigate to the Queen's chamber. Once into the queen's chamber, you will need to engage and destroy the birthmother. She will be ferocious, I have never encountered a queen who rolled over and died. You've got a hard fight on your hands.

Once the queen is dead, the rest of the colony will lose focus and disperse, you can return to normal size (Though I recommend leaving the lair before, unless you want to return to your full size COVERED IN ANTS.

Failing the above method, there is always Thermite.

 

[The Diabolical Biz]

To fight the ant, you must...

Become the ant.

So yeah, get an ant costume and go become one of them. Pose yourself as the last survivor of a different clan, lost and confused, starving, close to death. Point out your prodigious size as a useful point about you, and pledge eternal service to the hive. Hopefully they won't view you as a potential threat to the hive, or an ant assassin or something, and you can settle down to becoming one of them. A few weeks in, due to your exceptional work rate (you are a human after all), you will likely get promoted. Keep this up, and let your guard slip for not an instant.

In time, you will be raised to high commander of the ant hive (you will likely outlive most of the other commanders, and so can start to change history about how you are a legendary commander). During this time, secretly spread dissatisfaction within the ant workers. Start up trade unions under a guise, and make the workers aware of the communist manifesto. Let this corruption spread through the ranks of the ants, and bit by bit let yourself become known as a supporter of this movement to the now die-hard core section of fanatics.

Eventually, you will have recruited enough to your cause to strike! Declare the Queen a cruel autocrat, and lead your revolution! With your extensive access to the records of the hive, you should be able to eliminate the Queen's last supporters, and you can then behead the Queen with a tiny guillotine in front of the cheering masses!

You now have an army of ants at your behest! Invade the other hives, not unlike Russia in the 20th century, and build up a ring of Hives under your control. Force the Queens who don't want to die into serving you and introduce a strict indoctrination system with new baby ant grubs. You can become the leader of the Ant race for miles around, and do whatever you want.

The world, my friend, will be your Oyster.

 

[pineycorn]

Find someone with Aids. Cut them and have them bleed out over the anthill.

 

[Lukeje]

Find someone with Aids. Cut them and have them bleed out over the anthill.

Ermm... you understand the difference between ant and human biology, right? Or was that just meant to be a general life tip unrelated to the ant problem?

 

[Airsoftslayer93]

Fire!!!! burn the buggers

 

[Dalek Caan]

Fire, lots of and lots of fire. Flamethrower would be preferable. There are ways to make home made ones(but don't tell anyone i said that)

 

[Dr. wonderful]

Fire crackers.

They put some Lye powder there for good measure.

 

[noble cookie]

Curbstomp that *****.

 

[ipop@you]

This can be solved in 6 easy steps:
1)Maintain safe distance from the many tiny mandibles of steel
2)Apply goggles to avoid horrible eyeball removal
3)Assume horse stance
4)Now begin performing native dance to the tune of Electric Six's 'High Voltage'
5)Once ants are paralysed by nu-disco tunes, retreat to safety
6)Glass the planet, there is no hope any more
(Yes this is almost exactly the same tactic used to fight crabs but works surprisingly well for ants too).

Seriously though, call an exterminator or get a lot of flammable liquid/acid/bleach.