I know I have an idea... it's risky, but hear me out:
me push toward the center of the earth, fighting demons, monsters and blow-fish that would stand in our way, and reach the door in the middle. that door will transport us to the realm of the cosmic-cult, where we will storm the gate of quasar-fortress and demand the oval-king to transform you into the human you are, and give me a large-pizza...
I'll go bring my tooth-brush...