How would I please the all-mighty Wal-Mart?

[geK0]

I have come to a dark period in my life. For nearly a year I have been without a means of providing for myself; I have become demoralized, pathetic and desperate.
Alas, I have done something absolutely shameful, dispicable, completely worthy of derision; I have discarded my dignity because I am desperate in these dark times. I offered my mind, body and soul to the all-mighty Wal-Mart.
It has been a few nights now since I have made contact; Wal-Mart has summoned me to take part in a trial so that I may prove my worth. I am frightened.
I have come to somewhat of a dilemma; I have thrown away my dignity and have accepted that I am sub-human enough to be assimilated into Wal-Mart's ranks, but what type of attire would please them? If I were to wear the garb of a noble businessman, a simple dress shirt and pants with a tie perhaps, It might show that I have not accepted my place as lowly vermin, but if I were to wear the garb of a peasant, it might show disrespect to Wal-Mart's legion.
Oh how humiliating it would be to be rejected, thrown aside, discarded, deemed unworthy of a position within Wal-mart's ranks; I beg you kind escapists, reveal to me the ideal attire so that I may please the mighty Wal-Mart!


TL;DR: What do I wear to a Wal-Mart interview?

capcha:
be careful

thank you capcha

 

[Terminate421]

A blue polo and kaky's (However you spell it, don't correct me)

It helps if they get an idea of how you'd look in uniform.

 

[geK0]

-

Hrm, not sure why I didn't think of that. If the Escapist reputation points, you'd have gotten a reputation point for that.

 

[GistoftheFist]

I don't know why it would matter what you'd wear; not like Brawlmart employees are ever around to help anyone, more or less see what they dress like. Thank you Target for restocking the few items I was forced to buy at Squalmart so I never have to go there again. No longer will I have those three separate homeless guys crowding me for money or spanish guys trying to sell me a ziplock bag of tamales. Goodbye screaming children, swearing parents, and the only three dead-eyed cashiers my store employed.

 

[twistedmic]

TL;DR: What do I wear to a Wal-Mart interview?

A dress shirt, slacks and a tie would be the best choice, for any job interview period. It will make you look professional and responsible. Though anything other than a t-shirt and jeans would be good.
Also, don't wear a watch to the interview, it sends a bad message. And, for the love of all that is holy, do not answer your phone or send/read any texts while being interviewed.

Another bit of advice for the interview, make sure that whoever you have as references knows that you have the interview and can be reached. If they can't reach your references they will not be able to offer you a job.

 

[Launcelot111]

I'd go dress shirt, tie, khakis, nice shoes, belt (to be very specific). You might be able to get away with no tie or with a polo, but I'd be on the dressier side. You probably don't need a blazer or suit or anything.

Leave your phone in the car if you can. If you have any references or info that you usually keep on your phone, write it down somewhere.

 

[geK0]

Going to go with khakis and a blue dress shirt, no tie. That should be good enough I think.

 

[Rastien]

Rather over dressed than under i would say, generally when i go for an interview its dress shoes, suit smart shirt tie etc.

Also make sure you give yourself plenty of time even if your 30 minutes early shows your keen and taking the job seriously.

Aside from that be confident in the interview a firm hand shake is a must and keep eye contact with the interviewer and pretend to be enthusiastic.

Once you get the job you can slack but you gotta appear like you want it

 

[geK0]

Well I have the job now! I ended up wearing khakies and a blue dress shirt. thanks for the tips.

 

[imnot]

Also, don't wear a watch to the interview, it sends a bad message.

Whats wrong with a watch? Surley that would imply you are punctual?

 

[Chanel Tompkins]

Also, don't wear a watch to the interview, it sends a bad message.

Whats wrong with a watch? Surley that would imply you are punctual?

They might get the idea that you're a clockwatcher and the type that will vanish into the ether as soon as their scheduled shift is done, even if there's still shit to do.

 

[Imthatguy]

Well I have the job now! I ended up wearing khakies and a blue dress shirt. thanks for the tips.

Congrats bro, Just remember working at Wal-Mart is not you merely something you do for money to do things you actually want to do.

 

[geK0]

Well I have the job now! I ended up wearing khakies and a blue dress shirt. thanks for the tips.

Congrats bro, Just remember working at Wal-Mart is not you merely something you do for money to do things you actually want to do.

haha! I'm actually pretty happy to get the job, I just felt like making the OP melodramatic x P

 

[Dags90]

haha! I'm actually pretty happy to get the job, I just felt like making the OP melodramatic x P

Do Walmartians exist in Canadian Walmarts?

 

[Estranged180]

If/when you finally do get hired by Wal-Mart, make damned sure you do NOT swear anywhere in the store... I was fired because I was pulling a pallet of laundry detergent out of the stock room, and onto the floor, where it was to be worked, and a district manager got in my way. After saying 'excuse me' he failed to move. So I had to swerve to miss him, and instead, caught the corner of a pallet of car batteries. When the pallet of laundry detergent fell over on me, I said one word, 'fuck'. This district manager (who was a pharmacy district manager, and also had no business in the stock room) heard it, went and told my boss, and I was fired 4 minutes later.


TLR;
Be careful what you say.

 

[geK0]

haha! I'm actually pretty happy to get the job, I just felt like making the OP melodramatic x P

Do Walmartians exist in Canadian Walmarts?

walmartians? You mean like those crazy looking people you see on that "people of walmart" website? nah, you don't see crazies at Walmart any more than you would anywhere else in Canada.

 

[Imthatguy]

If/when you finally do get hired by Wal-Mart, make damned sure you do NOT swear anywhere in the store... I was fired because I was pulling a pallet of laundry detergent out of the stock room, and onto the floor, where it was to be worked, and a district manager got in my way. After saying 'excuse me' he failed to move. So I had to swerve to miss him, and instead, caught the corner of a pallet of car batteries. When the pallet of laundry detergent fell over on me, I said one word, 'fuck'. This district manager (who was a pharmacy district manager, and also had no business in the stock room) heard it, went and told my boss, and I was fired 4 minutes later.


TLR;
Be careful what you say.

Awesome Vash avatar bro

 

[Qwurty2.0]

Why?!

Why would you sell your soul to Walmart?!

OT: You should take self defense classes. The longer you are at Walmart, the higher your chances of being shanked in the parking lot.

[I'm joking (or am I?)].

 

[Quiet Stranger]

I really have to ask why you would go work for walmart, my life is pretty bad as it is but even I know better then to work there. (I'd really rather die then work there)

 

[Rawne1980]

There is only one way to dress for an interview.

Spoiler

Don't forget to strut.