How would the government react against a global Z-day?

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Disaster Button

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Feb 18, 2009
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If Nick Griffin were in control of my country, the UK, he'd tell the zombies to "fuck off, the country's full." Then make a speech about how he isnt a zombie racist.

Or more realistically, Gordon Brown, would probably say "Okay you can stay and eat brains if you want, just don't make me work or appear on TV."
 

Lonan

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Dec 27, 2008
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The Conservative government would probably blame the zombie apocalypse on Liberal mismanagement they were only able to end 4 years ago, (a tragically small number) spend millions on a Royal Commission to study the extent of the issue to look smart, and then just do what the Americans are doing no matter how good or bad an an idea it is. They will then find a way to blame any casualties on the previous Liberal government. Michael Ignatieff and every provincial leader of the opposition would accuse the government of mismanaging the zombie threat no matter how well it does, and Elizabeth May will blame it on global warming and Stephen Harper's climate change in-action plan. A motion to declare war on the zombies would be passed quickly through the House of Commons, but more slowly through the Senate, as the Zombie Apocalypse may have reduced their ability to get their arthritis medication and hearing aid batteries. It will then go to the Governor-General, who will immediately sign it into law, and control of the crisis will be handed to the military, which means things will finally start to happen.

People would probably be ordered to go to their cabins or cottages (whatever you call them) immediately. This will spread everyone out of major cities and allow the army and reserves to mop up any remaining zombies, while some forces go to major cabin/cottage area's and start vaccinating people with the highly competant national vaccine manufacturing company creating millions of vaccines a day.

Assuming the threat is taken care of that swiftly, we then need to deal with the millions of Americans trying to escape the terribly managed threat south of the border because Republicans believe it's just as much a money making hoax as global warming. (It is really happening? Ok well, even if it is, it's not that bad, and it's partially a natural cycle anyway, these sorts of things happen all the time. And even if it is the giant threat zombie apocalypse alarmists make it out to be, the market should take care of it rather than giving into a foreign socialist scheme to take away American sovereignty and give it to third world nations. And if it really is that bad, there's really nothing we can do about it anyway.) The Conservatives would probably like to just deport them all and throw the infected out of helicopters, but the stability on the domestic front (AKA, the public aren't distracted) would prevent the Conservatives from showing all their teeth, and true desires, until they get a majority. Refugees from everywhere would be given food, shelter, vaccinations, and low-interest loans for those who can't afford what they are being given, as such would be the will of the Canadian people.

Stephen Harper would still use every free moment to plot a majority. Speaking of which, the vaccinations of many Opposition Members may accidentaly have had too much of the virus in it, and they simply became infected beyond hope, and had to be put down. Several by-elections are held in previously non-Conservative ridings, where millions of dollars are poured into each Conservatives election campaign as a $350 million election is held during a global zombie apocalypse. The people riot, AND THEN...
...
I have no idea. To hard to tell. Yep, that's how this entire theoretical ends.
 

Dr Ampersand

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Jun 27, 2009
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They'd declare martial law and tell us to fend for ourselves. My plan that I've thought of before hand is as follows.

Pick a book, any book. I like dictionaries, heavy dictionaries, ones that can be used to bludgeon people to death with. Get some fire, I like fire, fire is pretty, fire is good. Set the book on fire, don't worry, it's safe, nothing to fear. Kill the zombies with the burning book, go on, kill them. They deserve this, they aren't good people, they aren't your friends. Meet up with survivors, they seem nice, they seem good...but wait! They must be laughing at you, they must be plotting against you, they must hate you. You must get rid of them, kill them, all of them. It may seem bad but they deserve it, they should suffer for what they've done, suffer and burn. They're not good people, they're not your friends, they're not even as good as zombies, they're liars. They lie as you choke them to death, they lie as they slowly bleed to death, they lie as you give them the punishment they deserve. They call you mad, they say you have no reason to kill them but they're wrong. It's not true, none of it is. You're doing this to protect yourself, from them and their lies. Surely you can't be blamed for that?
 

orangebandguy

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Jan 9, 2009
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The upper class and government would be isolated in a protection zone, the rest of us would be sacrificed to the horde. That's Britain.
 

Fniff

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Apr 15, 2009
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Nwolfwood said:
i dont really see australia ever having a zombie apocolypse. all it would have to do is close its borders (see game pandemic) and it would be zombie free as long as the infection doesnt start there. you cant attack an island continent if your a zombie, because you cant swim!
Yeah.

But you can walk.

Oh ho who.

World War Z.
 

The DSM

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Apr 18, 2009
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Its the U.K bugger all.

Id gather all the Escapists in the U.K and GTFO up north where they the zombies wil freeze freeze, and leave everyone else. Also ransack every where on the way.
 

Syl4r

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Nov 15, 2009
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MY PROTIPS: Taken from the zombie survival guide
Hide upstairs, and destroy the stairs. Zombies can't climb.
Zombies die eventually, as they are still corpses they shall be consumed by bacteria and maggots, so it is possible to wait out a Z-day

The DSM said:
Its the U.K bugger all.

Id gather all the Escapists in the U.K and GTFO up north where they the zombies wil freeze freeze, and leave everyone else. Also ransack every where on the way.
Can i come with? I have a air rifle and chainsaw in my house :D
 

Syl4r

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Nov 15, 2009
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Isn't it wonderful how we're all planning for the apocalypse? I cant wait to see this place in 2012 XD
 

w-Jinksy

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May 30, 2009
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i suppose britain would be fine as our army is trained to shoot once in the body and then the head to assure absolute deadness of said person being shot.

also the legion of chavs should provide a distraction. and generally itll probably end up like shaun of the dead except less zombies as most people arent stupid enough to stand still or go slowly.
 

Soxafloppin

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Jun 22, 2009
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Northern ireland, it would just be like a regular Ardoyne Riot. Only with Zombies
 

anthony87

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Aug 13, 2009
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It's Ireland.....we'd club and stab the shit out of the zombies while musing about how it could be worse. Then go to the pub.