How young is too young for you to date? Acceptable age range?

[Aetera]

I was just wondering what you consider to be an acceptable age range for dating. What is the youngest and the oldest you'd be willing to date? When is the age gap inappropriate, or do you think that as long as the two people involved are over 18, it's okay?

I'm wondering because I just started seeing an 18 year old, and I'm 26. The thing is, I live in a small town and she's the first other lesbian I've met here in years, so I don't exactly have a lot of options. So I guess for me, I'd be willing to date from 18 up to around the mid-to-late-30s, just from limited options alone. Maybe even older.

...Am I robbing the cradle? D:

 

[tippy2k2]

Sorry, your situation made me think of that South Park episode

The older you get, the less it matters. For me, 18 would be way too young (I'm 28 for the record). I think that the acceptable age ranges would be that underage basically dates underage (or near it like a 17 and 18 year old), college kids (18-22ish) would date each other, and then past that have at it (though I would stop at a 10+ year difference).

Personally, I don't think I'd want someone younger than 24 and I wouldn't want anyone older than their mid-30s. You know, unless they have a smokin hot bo...I mean...uh....mind >.>

 

[BathorysGraveland2]

For me, it'd be 16 seeing as that's my country's legal age of consent. I personally find the number to be artificial as there are plenty of context-sensitive situations, but there has to be a line drawn somewhere, which is usually between 14 and 18. My country has it at 16, so that's the youngest I'll go. If I was living in Germany, then it'd drop to 14. 15 in Sweden, etc. I'd never go below Germany's age of consent, however. I think that's about as young as a consent law should ever go. Keeping in mind that it's dating as well, which causes it to go beyond mere sexual activity. If it was strictly sexual, I don't think I'd be comfortable with anyone below 16, maybe. Dunno.

So for me, it's more about obeying the law of whatever country I'd be in, as opposed to having an artificial boundary.

Your case is far more justified than mine though, seeing as you have limited partner-options by nature. I wouldn't say it's "robbing the cradle" at all.

 

[Elfgore]

My age is nineteen right now. Youngest I'd go is about seventeen, oldest about thirty. I couldn't bring myself to date someone younger.

But your situation is special. Small town and lesbian. I wouldn't say you are. If she was under eighteen then yes, but since she can legally consent, I see no problem.

 

[DasDestroyer]

The half your age plus seven rule seems like a decent guideline. So for me (19*0.5)+7 = 16 for lowest age and (19-7)*2 = 24 for highest, which certainly doesn't sound unreasonable. Of course age of consent and, you know, feelings, can complicate matters, but that's why it's only a guideline.

 

[FootloosePhoenix]

Oh, I like my boys young...er by about a year. Two is fine. As an 18-year-old, any younger than that would be...questionable, I feel. Really it's the maturity level of the people in the relationship that matters, legality aside. The older you get, the less it seems relevant.

Although honestly I'm pretty uncomfortable by the fact that my only two experiences of guys randomly approaching me for a date has been when the men in question look a good decade or more older than I am. Coupling that with people commonly mistaking me for being younger than I am...yeah, "uncomfortable" is the word I would describe those situations with.

 

[CrimsonBlaze]

I'm in my mid 20s and for me, the youngest age that I would date a woman is 20.

Simply put, teenagers (yes, even 18 and 19) are either still too immature or just barely taking their first few years into the real world. I figure that after a few years of self-discovery and experiences, they would know themselves and be comfortable with who they are. That way, we can focus on building a relationship together instead of working on the woman's identity.

 

[Angelowl]

25 years old over here, minium age is 20 provided they are emotionally mature and not just overgrown teenagers. Maximum would be around 30-35 I think. I am not that picky when it comes to age, what matters most are mental maturity and how well each of us get along. But since it is practically impossible for transsexuals to adopt children in Sweden, I have reservations regarding a long term relationship since I want at least one child.

 

[ExtraDebit]

She's just 16 years old leave her alone they say, separated by fools who don't know what love is yet, but I want you to know, if I can fly I'll pick you up, I'll take you into the night and show you love like you never seen ever seen yeah!

 

[Eamar]

I'm 22 and bisexual, and my answers are different for men and women. I can't really see myself dating a man who was younger than me at all, but I'd be prepared to date a woman who was 20, possibly 19 depending on the individual. I'm not really sure why, and I'm pretty sure things'll change over time.

As for your situation OP, not going to lie, I probably would instinctively wonder whether the relationship was in some way exploitative. Not because 8 years is a ridiculous age gap (it isn't), but because 18 is still very young in most cases, and an 18 year old and a 26 year old are likely to be at totally different stages of life and development. It's totally unfair since I don't know either of you, but I would imagine you're going to have to prepare yourself for a few comments. That said, if it works for you guys don't worry about it.

 

[Esotera]

n/2 + 7 is the rule, so according to that it's borderline weird (although I don't really put much faith in that rule). Basically as long as someone is older than 18 they can date whoever they want of whatever age range and it won't particularly bother me, although it might raise eyebrows. The one thing I find creepy is guys who consistently date much younger girls...my friend is about to graduate from university and is still dating a girl who still goes to our old 6th form. It's so incredibly weird as most of us left that part of our life years ago...

 

[Bestival]

18 Would be lowest I guess, but would also kind of depend on the person. Some people are quite mature at 18, some are very immature at 26 (like meeeeee <@:^D ).

My cousin dated a 16 year old for a while, when he was 22. And regarding that topic he said; "Yeah sure, it seems a bit weird right now, but think about it. When she's 22, I'll be 28, doesn't sound so weird then."


She later dumped him for being immature though, so his theory didn't quite pan out as expected.

 

[Jazoni89]

Love knows no boundaries, if you truly love someone who is much younger than you, I say go for it, considering he/she's at the age of consent, and has a certain maturity to him, or her. Don't let societies silly views and opinions cloud your judgement.

At the moment, I'm nearly 25, but if I was truly love someone who was say 16 (the age of consent in my country) I would go for it. I haven't had a girlfriend in several years, so I feel for myself that I have a lot of catching up to do, in terms of my age, and the amount of girlfriends I never got.

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

Depends on my age and where I'm at right now. I'm 24 and wouldn't date a person under 20 or over 30, because to me if you're under 20 you're a filthy teenager with no fucking clue about yourself, and if you're over 30 and you want to date someone who isn't done with their education, what the fuck are you doing with your life?

That's my opinion and please take no offense peoples of The Escapist.

 

[LongAndShort]

23, and I would probably go 5 years either way, but I'd wanna keep the gap closer than that. Differences in maturity and all that.

 

[Auron225]

I'm 22 so given the "1/2 your age, plus 7" rule of thumb; my own age range would be 18-30.

I think I'd be a little uncomfortable going out with a girl 8 years older than me. 26 is probably the oldest I'd go. 18 seems a tad young but I think I'd be alright with it. I'm more concerned with a persons mental maturity than their age.

EDIT:

snip

In your situation, I don't think the normal "rules" apply... given the lack of general option and all that. The only thing I'd be sure of is that I actually like the person and I'm not just going out with them because they are the only option.