I failled at life, thinking of joining the army .

[Grathius22]

Dude, don't join the army because you feel like you failed at life. At least have a reason for it. A pride in yourself.

Do what you want. No matter the costs. This may be crazy, but the way I see it... as long as you're not hurting anyone but yourself: do what you want.

Be homeless. Do drugs all day. Be a prostitute. Fuck bitches get money. Get a job. Get a house. Raise a family. What ever.

Just do it. If joining the army is what you really want, then do it.

 

[Frankster]

As far as life failure stories go, this barely qualifies as one imo.

Obviously it doesn't feel that way since it's happening to you, but fuck me I routinely see stories in the vein of yours but 10x worst (im talking 30 yr olds that can't afford their own place so live at parents, dead end job with no prospects, failing uni due to personal problems, 0 self esteem and confidence that means they have 0 friends and no prospect of getting a gf so no social support whatsoever, and then become so depressed and unfit they can't even join the army, which is the usual fallback plan for most guys for some reason, and then it gets even worst...) so hard to take this seriously. You're 23 for gawds sake....

You got way more going on for you then you realize, i actually find it frustrating you described your story as a "life failure", no wonder there is so much depression and shit in this world.

Eugh..Ok an actual OT reply:
My experience is limited to a friend who join the US marines on an aircraft carrier and a childhood friend who joined the british army.

In both cases, they get sent off for months at a time, then I see them again. The US marine on the aircraft carrier described his experience as fun if a sausagefest as the aircraft carrier is full of guys and apparently the US marines are heavily into gay innuendo and pranks. He has no gf so can't speak about how it affects his relationships.
The british army guy is in afghanistan and from sounds of it isn't quite as "fun" as aircraft carrier duty is. His wife stays at an army base iirc.

But about being more "mature", unless you become a classy officer like the brit guy, i wouldn't put my hopes up. In fact the US marines friends are some of the most immature peeps i know for their age :/

 

[Alandoril]

Making people feel like failures in their 20s? Yup, that'll be modern capitalism for you.

Join the club. I'm 28 and the only jobs I managed to get in two years of looking after university were a zero hour contract in a cafe, and a part time job in a pharmacy. Still at the pharmacy and hating every single minute of it, and even though I'm just barely above minimum wage the company still feels the need to knock hours of my wages until at this point they owe me around £2000, and I only earn £7000 a year. Still live with my parents, zero chance of affording my own place, and no woman will even look at me.

The problem is the only other jobs around are the same old shop work bullshit or ones that require experience that you can only get by having had the job in the first place...

 

[charge52]

Not to say that people in the army are people that failed at life. I have nothing but the utmost respect for our soldiers.

That being said, i am a 23 year old male , that has dropped out of university, work a dead end job, and have more problems than i can handle. I have made quite a few ( too many ) mistakes in my life and i am thinkng that i need a fresh start. I live with my girlfriend and we have just barely enough to get by . Not a Glamorous life but we do manage to get by .

Now a thought crossed my mind a few months ago about joining the army . I do believe that joining, would help my self-esteem , confidence and lack of maturity. It would allow me to experience certain things that i might not get the chance to otherwise. Now i know it isn't the easiest think to do , but i am pretty confident i could pass the initial test ( medical and fitness and whatnot ) so that isn't the issue. I am curious about the "life in/during/after the army" .

I am a canadian citizen , and would obviously join the canadian forces. Basically what i am looking for in this thread is for people to tell me their experiences in the army ( not necessarily canadian of course ) , what's it like, what should i watchout for , how this may affect my life with my girlfriend ( it's a serious relationship ). Basically how shit would go down , if i decide to take the plunge into this .

I do hear a lot of people who go through the initial training don't make it through, but i'm not really interested in discussing the physical requirements for going into the army , but more about how it will affect my life in general. The good and the bad.

So if you have been in the army, if you are in the army, if you personally know people that are in the army, i would like to hear from you . Thank you in advance.

DON'T DO IT. For the record I know caps make it look like i'm yelling, but I am. My brother joined the army for the same reasons, and he was lucky enough to survive, it has been 4 years since he was discharged for shell shock. He still has nightmares, is barely recovering from drug addiction, which he fell to because drugs took away the nightmares, and he almost murdered someone because he was hallucinating and thought they were a terrorist.

On a less serious note, captcha, what happened to my Pie? Captcha: they ate it
I knew it!

 

[JeffBergGold]

You think you have failed life at 23? Not possible. You can have a bad trajectory but you still have many opportunities to right your ship. I wouldn't consider you a failure yet. In my case I've made plenty of mistakes as well. However, mine is to the point I can't even join the army until my probation ends! I'd jump at the opportunity If I were you having room and board covered gives you the opportunity to save a lot of money. It also gives you discipline for later in life, and it pays for college so you don't have loan debt. I'd say go for it.

It's peacetime so you don't really have to be too scared about getting deployed. Although I was kind of looking forward to getting deployed.

 

[Kolby Jack]

Not to say that people in the army are people that failed at life. I have nothing but the utmost respect for our soldiers.

That being said, i am a 23 year old male , that has dropped out of university, work a dead end job, and have more problems than i can handle. I have made quite a few ( too many ) mistakes in my life and i am thinkng that i need a fresh start. I live with my girlfriend and we have just barely enough to get by . Not a Glamorous life but we do manage to get by .

Now a thought crossed my mind a few months ago about joining the army . I do believe that joining, would help my self-esteem , confidence and lack of maturity. It would allow me to experience certain things that i might not get the chance to otherwise. Now i know it isn't the easiest think to do , but i am pretty confident i could pass the initial test ( medical and fitness and whatnot ) so that isn't the issue. I am curious about the "life in/during/after the army" .

I am a canadian citizen , and would obviously join the canadian forces. Basically what i am looking for in this thread is for people to tell me their experiences in the army ( not necessarily canadian of course ) , what's it like, what should i watchout for , how this may affect my life with my girlfriend ( it's a serious relationship ). Basically how shit would go down , if i decide to take the plunge into this .

I do hear a lot of people who go through the initial training don't make it through, but i'm not really interested in discussing the physical requirements for going into the army , but more about how it will affect my life in general. The good and the bad.

So if you have been in the army, if you are in the army, if you personally know people that are in the army, i would like to hear from you . Thank you in advance.

It's basically what I did (except I went Navy), but not for the self-improvement reasons, more for the paycheck. Still, it may be different for you, but Boot Camp was fairly easy for me, and I'm not physically fit at all. It's more mental than anything, you just gotta get the right mindset.

Also, my chief in Boot Camp would constantly tell us that our girlfriends were cheating on us while we were there. At least one guy got a break-up letter from his girl, too. I know it's not at all guaranteed, far from it, but you'd be surprised at how unwilling some girls can be to wait for you, in boot camp or on deployments. Just something to consider.

 

[loc978]

Similar reasons here. When I was 22, the semiconductor industry had fallen on its face and I had been on unemployment for a year as a result. I joined for a steady job and self-improvement... and while I made it out alive and more employable, I also made it out crippled. My back, left leg, and hearing will never function properly again, I've got chronic pain that will be with me the rest of my life, and I've frustrated several psychologists with my refusal to take antidepressants for what they're still not sure is PTSD, survivor syndrome, or just regular ol' depression.
...Now I'm in a completely different dead-end job that I could have done when I was 22 (I just didn't know how well private security firms payed, back then), I have all of these extra problems, and I'm 31. Yay?

Oh yeah, also... kiss your hometown and girlfriend goodbye if you join. You'll be a different person when you come back, and your hometown will have changed a lot in the years you were away. As for the girlfriend... again, you'll be a different person, and you'll also be very far away for several years. I've seen relationships last through a stint in the military, but only with married couples who fought to keep the spouse in base housing... and that is one hell of a fight, on top of all the rest of the shit you'll be putting up with. If you don't get married before joining, they won't even consider letting you stay together.

 

[Basement Cat]

Say goodbye to your girlfriend.

While I never joined up myself half of my friends from high school did: U.S. Army, Navy, and the Marines.

Every one who had any relationship when he started ended up on his own. It doesn't stop just by joining up, either. Scott, a friend who went mustang and became a lifer wanted to join the special forces. But he was married and already had 1 or 2 kids.

Because of this an older officer Scott respected sat him down and gave him a 'talk'. Basically the man warned Scott off of joining the S.F.'ers by emphasizing that the divorce rate for such soldiers was about 60% to 70% percent or so--NOTE--Scott likely exaggerated the numbers given, he's like that, but the point was that being a military wife is hard to begin with and with certain military jobs marriage is pretty much unwise unless you're well into your thirties and eyeing getting out to begin with.

 

[userwhoquitthesite]

Not to say that people in the army are people that failed at life. I have nothing but the utmost respect for our soldiers.

That being said, i am a 23 year old male , that has dropped out of university, work a dead end job, and have more problems than i can handle. I have made quite a few ( too many ) mistakes in my life and i am thinkng that i need a fresh start. I live with my girlfriend and we have just barely enough to get by . Not a Glamorous life but we do manage to get by .

Now a thought crossed my mind a few months ago about joining the army . I do believe that joining, would help my self-esteem , confidence and lack of maturity. It would allow me to experience certain things that i might not get the chance to otherwise. Now i know it isn't the easiest think to do , but i am pretty confident i could pass the initial test ( medical and fitness and whatnot ) so that isn't the issue. I am curious about the "life in/during/after the army" .

I am a canadian citizen , and would obviously join the canadian forces. Basically what i am looking for in this thread is for people to tell me their experiences in the army ( not necessarily canadian of course ) , what's it like, what should i watchout for , how this may affect my life with my girlfriend ( it's a serious relationship ). Basically how shit would go down , if i decide to take the plunge into this .

I do hear a lot of people who go through the initial training don't make it through, but i'm not really interested in discussing the physical requirements for going into the army , but more about how it will affect my life in general. The good and the bad.

So if you have been in the army, if you are in the army, if you personally know people that are in the army, i would like to hear from you . Thank you in advance.

The people I know that were in the military fall into two groups. the decent normal people, and the insufferable jackasses who think that being in the military makes them better than everyone else. It doesn't.
So, as long as you don't let it go to your head, its a pretty good thing: at least in america, a military record will gain MAJOR points when looking to get hired for anything, and its a good place to teach yourself to be in better shape (obviously).
that said, the people I know never went to combat, so I can't say about life following that

 

[SaetonChapelle]

I'm not personally in the army, but my best friend of 15+ years is. We have totally different viewpoints on the matter, however I respect her decision.

she joined the US version of the reserves. Now this means she gets paid to go for one weekend a month, do some pushups and get paid. She has yet to see action (not that I want her to) or do anything more strenuous. I find this a waste of time. However this does not mean I think the military in general is a waste.

It's good to want to fight for your country. The military can mature you (although it never did for her, don't kid yourself you want to have to change in order to change). It's hard work but it can build self confidence and help you along in life financially and emotionally. you build great bonds and friendships.

Personally, I could never join. I don't think I have the physical ability, and I don't want to one day find myself in a position where I could potentially be firing a weapon at another individual. But, it's good for future careers and goals, and finding yourself. If you feel you should, go for it dude.

 

[Dags90]

I knew someone in largely the same position as you. He was a lazy, high school drop out who considered the careers ahead of him to be below him.

He came back a virtually identical man child. The main difference is that he's in a lot better shape physically due to the training.

 

[Mr Mystery Guest]

I have a friend who joined the British army and was in it for two years. If you have any military experience then you get fast tracked through the police force. So he skipped walking the beat and started off as a Sargent. He was a detective in three years. Thou that was when they were hiring. Check to see if it's similar in Canada. It would be more conducive to family life. You are obviously intelligent and articulate and the military need qualities like that. One thing, ask yourself if you want to have kids because you won't want to leave them when you get sent abroad.

 

[The Ubermensch]

If you can get into the Marines; get into the Marines.

Trainings better, and I think they get paid more.

That said, I'm Australian, so I only have what I've gleaned from the boy's in the field to go on. Pay rates don't come into conversation too much, but I knew this retired DI that was looking to start up his own business after he was discharged. Master Sergeant, full 20 years... and he was a sick **** too; I fucking love that guy.

I do get the impression that the US Army (with exception to the rangers) are treated as cannon fodder where as the US Marines are treated as Spartans. That's if infantry, don't know too much about the trades myself.

 

[Gitty101]

That may actually be a very good decision. Considering (as you've said) that you're in a dead-end position, I assume you don't have many other options? Well, the military will give you an untold amount of opportunities to grow and become specialist, whilst at the same time financing it all. Sure there's an element of risk, but the benefits for joining are huge.

Sorry for sounding like a recruiter, but this is in fact my plan for life. Though, unlike yourself, I'm still at Uni and hoping to get fast-tracked once I have my degree. That's my opinion on the matter anyway, it's one of the best things you could do in your situation. Next to winning the lottery of course.

Captcha: over the top...

 

[Artemis923]

I can't speak for Canada, but I can say the US military works wonders at getting you out of a "my life is shitty" jam. Sure, you have to work hard, and put up with people's bullshit...but, you have to do that anyway. At least in the military you get paid a decent enough wage that you can make a living off of.

Another tip: if you're going in, stay in. You'll get early retirement, a steady job, and enough cash to save up and stuff in retirement plans so you'll be set for your later years in life.

I did six years in the US Navy, and now I'm using my GI Bill benefits to get a degree at AI for game programming. There were days I hated the military, there were days I loved it; in fact, I kinda miss it from time to time.

 

[Artemis923]

Not to say that people in the army are people that failed at life. I have nothing but the utmost respect for our soldiers.

That being said, i am a 23 year old male , that has dropped out of university, work a dead end job, and have more problems than i can handle. I have made quite a few ( too many ) mistakes in my life and i am thinkng that i need a fresh start. I live with my girlfriend and we have just barely enough to get by . Not a Glamorous life but we do manage to get by .

Now a thought crossed my mind a few months ago about joining the army . I do believe that joining, would help my self-esteem , confidence and lack of maturity. It would allow me to experience certain things that i might not get the chance to otherwise. Now i know it isn't the easiest think to do , but i am pretty confident i could pass the initial test ( medical and fitness and whatnot ) so that isn't the issue. I am curious about the "life in/during/after the army" .

I am a canadian citizen , and would obviously join the canadian forces. Basically what i am looking for in this thread is for people to tell me their experiences in the army ( not necessarily canadian of course ) , what's it like, what should i watchout for , how this may affect my life with my girlfriend ( it's a serious relationship ). Basically how shit would go down , if i decide to take the plunge into this .

I do hear a lot of people who go through the initial training don't make it through, but i'm not really interested in discussing the physical requirements for going into the army , but more about how it will affect my life in general. The good and the bad.

So if you have been in the army, if you are in the army, if you personally know people that are in the army, i would like to hear from you . Thank you in advance.

It's basically what I did (except I went Navy), but not for the self-improvement reasons, more for the paycheck. Still, it may be different for you, but Boot Camp was fairly easy for me, and I'm not physically fit at all. It's more mental than anything, you just gotta get the right mindset.

Also, my chief in Boot Camp would constantly tell us that our girlfriends were cheating on us while we were there. At least one guy got a break-up letter from his girl, too. I know it's not at all guaranteed, far from it, but you'd be surprised at how unwilling some girls can be to wait for you, in boot camp or on deployments. Just something to consider.

Your chief was right.

My ex cheated on my for a whole year while I was in nuke school.
It sucks, but it happens.

 

[DanDeFool]

I live near a military base and know a considerably large amount of people in the military. I'll write the pros/cons

Pros:
Respect
Waving your military card gets you military discounts (Not sure if it works in Canada)
An average amount of money.
Free housing if you're a high rank.
Shops in military bases have no taxes whatsoever

Cons:
You can't get really rich, you'll have the money to get by and if you're above average in the ranks, FREE HOUSING AND LOTS O' MONEY. But it's hard to get high.
The government will make you relocate to a military base, if you join, say goodbye to whatever town you live in.
A second job may be needed such as construction worker, lifeguard, whatever...


These are all based on observing an American military base. I'm not so sure if Canada's system is exactly like or similar to the American system.

I had heard that American soldiers get paid very, very poorly, at least in the lower ranks. I remembered because I thought it rather odd that a nation that so idolized its' soldiers would pay them like McDonalds workers. Is that true?

Yes, low ranks do get paid poorly because of the economy America is in. Sometimes, the government will skip out on paying checks because of the budget. Which is why a good portion of the soldiers have second jobs.

I've heard pretty much the same, not to mention the stories about Uncle Sam skipping out on medical benefits for wounded veterans. Basically, unless you become a mid to high ranking officer, or maybe a special forces soldier or a fighter pilot or something, don't expect too much out of a military career money-wise.

On the other hand, you might qualify for military education benefits. There are probably also some OJT opportunities you could take advantage of.

On the whole, it's probably not too different from other careers, in that if you're ambitious and disciplined you can find some way to be successful.

 

[Tyrel Arington]

Not to say that people in the army are people that failed at life. I have nothing but the utmost respect for our soldiers.

That being said, i am a 23 year old male , that has dropped out of university, work a dead end job, and have more problems than i can handle. I have made quite a few ( too many ) mistakes in my life and i am thinkng that i need a fresh start. I live with my girlfriend and we have just barely enough to get by . Not a Glamorous life but we do manage to get by .

Now a thought crossed my mind a few months ago about joining the army . I do believe that joining, would help my self-esteem , confidence and lack of maturity. It would allow me to experience certain things that i might not get the chance to otherwise. Now i know it isn't the easiest think to do , but i am pretty confident i could pass the initial test ( medical and fitness and whatnot ) so that isn't the issue. I am curious about the "life in/during/after the army" .

I am a canadian citizen , and would obviously join the canadian forces. Basically what i am looking for in this thread is for people to tell me their experiences in the army ( not necessarily canadian of course ) , what's it like, what should i watchout for , how this may affect my life with my girlfriend ( it's a serious relationship ). Basically how shit would go down , if i decide to take the plunge into this .

I do hear a lot of people who go through the initial training don't make it through, but i'm not really interested in discussing the physical requirements for going into the army , but more about how it will affect my life in general. The good and the bad.

So if you have been in the army, if you are in the army, if you personally know people that are in the army, i would like to hear from you . Thank you in advance.

About three years ago I was at the same place. I was working at a small retail chain with no future in sight. I failed out of university so my GPA was 1.7. I ended up coming back to school and I have worked my fingers to the bone and I have brought GPA up, I helped found a new school club. The thing is I got serious about my life and took charge. I made an informed decision about myself and developed my self-awareness. I admitted my own faults and simply worked to improve myself.

I am not saying school is the right answer for you, it might be, it might lie with becoming military person. Both are hard and challenging in their own ways. I wouldn't make this decision on the fly, but think about it for at least six months and if it is still there sounding good go for it. Be realistic with your goals, small goals are especially important.

My biggest point here, don't be scared of Risk!

A video that has helped me many times.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RmTxr7OsPj0&feature=player_embedded