I have a question more geared towards the males on this forum but everyone is free to respond

[Blow_Pop]

why do some guys (i find this more with gamers, nerds, and mormons for some odd reason) not find themselves attractive when clearly they are.......

and have women fight over them?

to clarify, i'm not trying to single anyone out and by guys i mean males in general i just want a little bit of insight into the male psyche.......

 

[geddydisciple]

because a good portion of guys are too thick to realize it when a women starts to act interested in them. then when they don't see any chicks making a move (even if they are making a move) they assume there is something wrong with them, and yes i speak from personal expirience.

 

[SuperFelix]

Generally, gamers and nerds are sometimes stigmatized by 'jocks', which often results in low self esteem. For this reason, they often think of themselves less handsome than they are, which answers your first question.

 

[SquirrelPants]

Because I'm fat and don't care about my appearance, so I just assume I'm not attractive...=3
And I'm not. My last girlfriend mostly liked me for my awesome personality, which is more than I can say about the guy she left me for. =P

 

[Antidamacus]

I like to think I'm a pretty sharp guy.

I used to hang out with a girl at work occasionally (she has a boyfriend)

One day our friendship just goes away, I ask why. Apparently she's had a crush on me the entire time and just never said anything. She felt we were getting "too close" and broke it off.

I just flat out wasn't aware of this.

I think sometimes girls just don't give clear signals. Guys, not wanting to be stalkers, wait for clear signs.

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

We have mirrors.
And I personally have never been lusted after in my life.
(Y'know, except for when I was young enough for it to be fucking sick)

 

[traceur_]

Because chicks are IMPOSSIBLE to figure out, if you want a guy, go up to him and say "let's have sex", you will never get a "no". I'm not a nerd but nor am I a jock, I'm happy with my looks but I figure if a girl really wants me she will say so in a direct fashion.

 

[linchowlewy]

I'm the other way around. I often see moves being made when they're not there and think i'm rather attractive. but my poor social skills let me down. Oh and i'm a dude by the way.

 

[Crystal Cuckoo]

Guys need clear hints.
Well not hints. More like actions. You could be as subtle as a sledgehammer to the face and your guy may barely pick it up.
Even when we pick it up, we're still afraid to do anything, because if we're wrong, it'll almost definitely end badly.
Also, as one guy said above me, we get a little beaten down by the jocks, and therefore tend to think a little less of ourselves.
You can't really do anything about this sort of thing... But hey, at least these types of guys are humble!

 

[Blow_Pop]

well, reasoning behind my questioning, my boy and i were talking about an hour ago before he went to bed and we were talking twilight actors/actresses. he mentioned he wanted kristen stewart and i mentioned i wanted robert pattinson i was asked why and i told him because he is british(i am a sucker for accents) and very musically inclined. nothing really to do with looks. and my boy was like he's not attractive but then neither am i. He has me after him always and forever plus just about every girl he knows after him. I don't get how you get so many girls openly trying to date you or have sex with you and not find yourself attractive. I tell him every day multiple times a day how increasingly attractive and gorgeous he is. then again, he lies to me and tells me i'm beautiful so maybe he thinks i'm lying. anyways though other girls tell him how attractive he is as well. i have a few gay friends who are jealous that he is not gay and that i have him and won't share. i'm having a hard time comprehending this. i've had other guy friends with the same complex too...

 

[RavingPenguin]

I think its more of a lack of interest in our looks. Most guys I meet dont care what they look like most of the time. We never give much thought to it, and when asked about it most of the time we answer, "I dont think so, I never really thought about it before."
*my opion on the matter, and also the way I think.

 

[Aschenkatza]

I hate to disrupt your male psyche, but it's really us females fault >.>
We are so damn vague when it comes to showing attraction. We giggle and flutter out eye lashes and act all delicate... It's really disgusting when you think about it. God forbid we just freaking tell you -.-;

I suggest a universal sign of attraction!

 

[Blow_Pop]

Because chicks are IMPOSSIBLE to figure out, if you want a guy, go up to him and say "let's have sex", you will never get a "no". I'm not a nerd but nor am I a jock, I'm happy with my looks but I figure if a girl really wants me she will say so in a direct fashion.

not all of us. i'm easy. give me a video game or a book (make them something i'm interested in which you do by talking to me) and i'm happy. guarenteed. i'd say buy me a knife, dagger, or sword however, i prefer to buy my own weaponry so, in which case gift cards. or a vintage car......show me one and rev the engine i'm yours..... but i'm also one of the few simple girls to figure out.

you forget the shyness factor that some girls have as well. I'm very shy still and it takes a lot for me to go up to a guy and talk to him about something OTHER than cars or video games.

 

[Blow_Pop]

I hate to disrupt your male psyche, but it's really us females fault >.>
We are so damn vague when it comes to showing attraction. We giggle and flutter out eye lashes and act all delicate... It's really disgusting when you think about it. God forbid we just freaking tell you -.-;

I suggest a universal sign of attraction!

i think its also something with guys not just us girls... btw i LOVE your icon

 

[NeoAC]

Well, I've been told my face looks like a cross between Brett Favre and Jaromir Jagr, so that's why I don't think I'm attractive (Google '92 Jagr, not recent Jagr)

 

[matrix3509]

There has only been one confirmed case for me where a girl has been attracted to me initially. Coincidentally, that relationship lasted longer than all of my previous relationships combined.

That said, most guys have been conditioned from birth to believe that looks alone aren't going to attract women. Indeed most guys won't ever need to actually be attractive.

I however, have far too little patience for the whole mixed messages thing most women do, and I am too lazy to play the game. If you make your interest known to me, yeah I'll probably take the bait, but otherwise you won't see me with even an inkling of interest in a relationship.