I just made CoD: MW3 30 times better.

[McNinja]

Modern Warfare 3 is not a modern-day military shooter. It is a futuristic shooter.

"But McNinja, how? Last time I checked, I don't live in the future." Wrong. The future is now! Just kidding. The future was yesterday.

By futuristic shooter, I mean Unreal Tournament. We are playing players playing a game. Let me break it down:

Multiplayer:
-This is a massive tournament, like Unreal Tournament/Championship. Players arrive in the lobby, wait for a map to be selected, and are then transferred into the correct appearance by way of holograms. This also explains how a knife can pass through thick armor instantly.
-Also, the knives are the equivalent of vibro-blades/lightsabers/power weapons. Armor means nothing.
-Players respawn. How would that work? Respawners from the Unreal universe, that's how.
-Players regenerate health. Nanotechnology and advanced gels (see medi-gel from Mass Effect) are applied to wounds and broken bones after enough time between taking "damage." Pain inhibitors make it so players can still move without that troublesome "pain" thing. Perks such as Final Stand allow players to live longer, but the nanotech and the gel partially immobilize the player for a short time due to the amount of damage taken.
-Lag is a by-product of the immensity of the game. The system used is not used to this sort of game, and still to this day required maintenance, despite the length of service.
-The system tries to be as accurate as possible with the sway and reticle bloom. However, since no one in the future really cares to look up how firearms in 2011 actually worked, they just winged the programming.

Singleplayer:
-The players from the future know what happened. They studied history. It's boring. Instead, they're just making this sh*t up as they go.


There you go. Now, before anyone says "wow, you really have nothing better to do than find excuses for the piss-poor game that is CoD:MW3?" I say, I thought all of this up in about 10 minutes, and some of it up as I was writing this.

Regardless, I think that the CoD series (and the Battlefield series as well) is actually an Unreal Tournament-style... game, with the only change being the time period the players choose to be in answers a lot of questions, and does indeed excuse a lot of the BS that goes on in both the single and multi-player. I mean, if you lived in the future, had a game you could play with millions of people simultaneously where you were the actual player and had unlimited respawns, but had grown bored of your own time period, what would you do?

So, what do you think of this?

 

[Falsename]

I.... this is.... w-....How can.....

 

[Lancer873]

Isn't thirty times zero still zero? HEYOOO!

OT: I've thought of scenarios like that before. Kind of an interesting level of thinking but... kinda silly too

 

[Dirty Hipsters]

Can't tell if this is retarded or brilliant. Guess I'll have to sleep on it.

 

[bl4ckh4wk64]

Can't tell if this is retarded or brilliant. Guess I'll have to sleep on it.

I'm gonna go with a little bit of both.

Either way, good job. You actually made me want to go back and play MW2.

 

[Fat Hippo]

Modern Warfare 3 is a modern-day military shooter. It is a futuristic shooter.

How can it be both?

It's a virtual reality. People in the future are playing a simulation of modern (as in now) combat, but because they have no idea what that was actually like, it's totally unrealistic.

Or something like that.

Strangely enough, this idea actually sounds more realistic than regular MW3.

 

[Smooth Operator]

So you written yourself some fan fiction then?
Well if it helps you get through the rough who are we to argue.

 

[lobster1077]

Oh I see its that City of Glass syndrome surrealist mindset thing.

 

[Whateveralot]

But how can..


It's a GAME. You don't have to imagine it's a virtual reality, it IS a virtual reality.

 

[SovietX]

Can't tell if this is retarded or brilliant. Guess I'll have to sleep on it.

I'm going with brilliantly retarded.

I like your way of overthinking but doesn't change the fact it's the exact same as the last few entries in the series.

Now if you will excuse me, i'm going to go play some Call Of Duty 2

 

[Thaluikhain]

I just made CoD: MW3 30 times better.

I uninstalled it.

Boom tish...

 

[tippy2k2]

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you are joking...

But just in case, here comes Buzz-Kill Man! Buzz-Kill Man, attack!

How in the world does that make the game better? Let us say that I hate the game with the passion of a thousand and three suns. Your half-assed explanation for why the game plays so badly is not going to make the game better.

You're just explaining away things that have just been gaming staples for a decade at this point (Thanks Halo!). These things don't need to be explained, they are expected limitations or game design choices by the developer.

Well Buzz-Kill Man has done his job here. Now to find a little girls tea party to explain why her stuffed animals are not real! Buzz-Kill Man awaaaaaaaaay!!!

 

[McNinja]

Can't tell if this is retarded or brilliant. Guess I'll have to sleep on it.

I'm going with brilliantly retarded.

I like your way of overthinking but doesn't change the fact it's the exact same as the last few entries in the series.

Now if you will excuse me, i'm going to go play some Call Of Duty 2

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you are joking...

But just in case, here comes Buzz-Kill Man! Buzz-Kill Man, attack!

How in the world does that make the game better? Let us say that I hate the game with the passion of a thousand and three suns. Your half-assed explanation for why the game plays so badly is not going to make the game better.

You're just explaining away things that have just been gaming staples for a decade at this point (Thanks Halo!). These things don't need to be explained, they are expected limitations or game design choices by the developer.

Well Buzz-Kill Man has done his job here. Now to find a little girls tea party to explain why her stuffed animals are not real! Buzz-Kill Man awaaaaaaaaay!!!

Don't get me wrong, my hatred of the game burns with the intensity of a million foreman grills. Everything in the game is taken within the context of the game's universe, not reality. In reality, Sledgehammer games and Infinity Ward made perhaps one of the most broken and ass-tastic shooters of all time, sticking with safe ideas in favor of something that would actually improve gameplay (at least it makes more sense in CoD for a soldier to have two weapons, as most soldiers don't walk around with more than a rifle and a pistol and a knife, perhaps a few granades), like servers with no lag, soldiers who could sprint more than 20 yards, real bullet damage (Hardcore mode is still ass, yet better than regular TDM), a spawn system that isn't compeltely broken (and more often than not will spawn you either two feet away from an enemy or at least in their LOS, making you one of the easiest kills ever). If there was one thing to fix, it would be the spawn system. I can't count how many times I've spawned next to a teammate then instantly died because my teammate got a predator missile shoved into his face.

In the context of the game's universe, the people in the future who populate this game couldn't give less of a damn about any sort of realism, which explains (mostly) the reasons for the generally unbalanced gameplay.

Also, no, I am not entirely serious. I'm not explaining the games faults away because I love the game and need to find a way to make people think the game is good or anything like that, I'm explaining them away because it just makes it a bit more lighthearted and funny. Sure, the game is ass, but this adds a bit of "they don't care, I don't care" silliness to this mess of a game.

 

[McNinja]

Isn't thirty times zero still zero? HEYOOO!

OT: I've thought of scenarios like that before. Kind of an interesting level of thinking but... kinda silly too

That's the point, adding silliness and a but of fun to a game that otherwise has none.

 

[vrbtny]

Upon reading this my mind

 

[Worgen]

Lol, that's an interesting way to think about it, its actually a game set far in the future but all the players are really teens role-playing as solders from wars everyone thinks happened, your not a heroic solder destroying your enemy for king and country, your a kid larping.

 

[NinjaDeathSlap]

But how can..


It's a GAME. You don't have to imagine it's a virtual reality, it IS a virtual reality.

There is much wisdom in this statement.

 

[SirLOLWTFBBQ]

What happens if we never bought it in the first place?