What is it with these pointless math challenge threads? I understand that anyone has the right to post a stumper they're having problems with and seek outside help, but I've seen two other "I've disproved math/undone reality as we know it/cured cancer/made cat litter brownies that actually taste good!" threads in the past two *weeks*.
I'll join the droves, OP, in reminding you that you're basically disregarding one of the earliest things we're taught in elementary school. 1 multiplied by 0 is 0. 256, 200 multiplied by 0 is STILL 0.
Zero is the concept of nothingness in as much a nutshell as basic human logic can allow us to comprehend. Divide any number by zero and you get a zero in return, no matter how much you try looking for tangent or that number's Sinus. Nothing multiplied a berjillion times is still absolutely nothing.
I'm aware that anything and everything that's scientific can be challenged or disproved with enough work, but you're dealing with the building blocks of how we perceive reality, here. We've relied on basic arithmetics for so long that any attempt at disproving it will be just as quickly debunked. The only calculations that allow for less-than-zero results don't deal with hard, tangible quantities - they're basically forms of leeway we've integrated into math to help us cope with abstract concepts like statistics, fractions, algebra and so on.
As there simply can't be minus-one LCD screens on my desk at this very moment, however, and as negative numbers only have their place in certain circumstances, then you simply cannot divide anything by zero.
If it's possible - and I do mean IF - doing so would require a complete restructuration of arithmetics, not to mention that it would fundamentally change the way we perceive the world. You've tried to bring about something that's fairly Lovecraftian, but that simply doesn't work in our boring old world.