I need some social advice

[mirasiel]

I'm going to do my utmost to ignore the various borderline misogynistic responses here and just point out that you have (or at least appear to have) a Terrible DM

1) HE made (or at least allowed )a homebrew OP class for her (after all the DM gets final say)

2) HE has failed to deal with obvious tensions at the table

3) HE is making the monsters not attack her (or she is so OP that her defences are unassailable, see 1) or they are attacking and he is fudging rolls?


Also:

4) YOUR ENTIRE party has continued to adventure with a character who tried to kill them...TWICE...are you all 4 int barbarians or something? AND you let them keep all the loot...no rogues in your group? or a persuasive bard/Intimidating Pally?

These are not 'perks' of being the DM's fuckbuddy, these are signs of a bad fucking DM*.

Just fucking tell the guy that his constantly allowing his SO to get her own way at the expense of everyone else isn't ok and if he can't deal with it then maybe one of you guys are going to have to pull on your big-boy cloak and trying fucking DMing for a while, trust me its not rocket surgery.


*been playing with my missus for 4-5 years now and DMing for 2 and our group has had mixes of partners/lovers before....strangely no problems.

 

[Substitute Troll]

It's not important what ones friends think of your girlfriend, but it's pretty damn important what your girlfriend thinks of your friends.

This is something your friend should know.

 

[somonels]

I admit interest in knowing how you eventually choose to approach this and the outcome. Such a classic case of D&D&Drama.

 

[Freechoice]

Talk to your friends and see if there's a consensus that she sucks. If they agree, tell them you're going to complain to the DM about it. If he's really a decent person, he shouldn't have been dating such a ***** in the first place. Show him the email, tell him the girlfriend is caustic and advise him to dump her +5 dickheaded ass. You're being a good friend by trying to remove her from his life because, well, you don't fuckin' treat people like shit unless they actually deserve it.

Chances are, you will lose this friend purely because enamored behavior trumps friendship. Sad, but true.

 

[LetalisK]

snip

Your friend probably doesn't date much or have many relationships, though not of his own choice, does he? It seems more like he's putting up with her shit because he sees having a bad girlfriend as being better than having no girlfriend.

 

[Royta]

snip

Your friend probably doesn't date much or have many relationships, though not of his own choice, does he? It seems more like he's putting up with her shit because he sees having a bad girlfriend as being better than having no girlfriend.

Sort of yeah. He's very dependable, everyone has a flaw. That's his.
He's been with her for around 3 years now, but the thought of being single really haunts him. I've known him for around 10-11 years now and have seen him single many times.
He's not pleasant during those times. So fixing a break up between the two (isn't too hard, both are easy to crack under peer pressure) isn't doing anyone a favor I think.

I'd never say it to his face though, but she is pretty much just like his mother. So in that sense they kind of connect and balance eachother out.

From the sound of ti OP you are a reasonable guy. However I will say this, I get the impression she doesn't really want to play DnD but rather feels that she has to so she can ahng out with her boyfriend. Now have you ever gone shopping with a bunc of girls and listen to them natter on about stuff you couldn't care about? Imagine that every week. So I can sympathise with her being testy and not enjoying it.

The fact of the matter is though, it was her idea to start the DnD group. So you'd think she'd know what she was getting into. I really understand her not enjoying it, especially since we're all completely different people with different tastes (us compared to her that is), but she should have seen that coming.

Also, dear god man. The shopping. We've all been there once, it's a test of faith that I tell you!

Let me get this straight...She's an 8th level character with three spell sets to choose from, dealing 4d6 damage, and has boons to AC or damage output?

Good god, man! Even Monks aren't that OP at 8th level! See, THIS is the exact reason why homebrew is broken as fuck. You want to do some OP shit, that's fine, but at least stick to the prestige classes. I've found from past experience that homebrew and psionics break the game in ways that can not be comprehended.

Hmm, this character is starting to annoy me. If I was a DM and someone pulled this shit, I'd summon Cthulhu.

Pretty much yeah. She's a ranged based Cleric Druid Oracle. The fun thing is though, even though she's overpowered she still isn't a big damage dealer most of the time. She's just not a good tactical player. Spams spells every chance she gets, low on spells when bosses arrive. Etc.
One thing I forgot to mention is that this class started out due to her being an Oracle and complaining about being underpowered. Granted, it's not a super class, but still. So we decided, we'll homebrew her all together so she can have fun. All 5 of us helped her and made a balanced class. Then in the weekend she complain to the DM that she wasn't satisfied. And got buffed with extra spelllists and that weird AC buff.
She's not unhittable though, she's got around 25 AC in total. I've got 29-31 depending on situations (shield wall). But I'm not as versatile as she is.
The irony being that she still keeps forcing the DM to nerf our Cavelier because he does too much damage (high strength + challenge + lance charge on horse back = 40-50 damage on average). It's high damage, but that's all he can do.

Ugh. Sorry man, I feel like I'm venting a bit and losing my cool.
Maybe I should DM one session and indeed summon Cthulhu... xD Looking forward to friday, I want this to end and start enjoying DnD again : )

 

[Macgyvercas]

Snip

If you're going to summon Cthulhu, you'll need this:


Cthulhu
Colossal Great Old One (Demigod)(Water)
Domains: Evil, Death, Destruction, Water
Hit Dice: 42d12+378 (882 hp)
Initiative: +5 (+1 Dex, +4 Improved Initiative)
Speed: 140ft., swim 140ft., fly 360ft. (poor)
AC: 47 (-8 size, +1 Dex, +39 natural, +5 divine)
Attacks: 6 tentacles +56 melee, 2 claws +50 melee, stamp +50 melee
Damage: Tentacle 4d6+16 (Improved Critical), claw 2d8+8, stamp 4d6+8
Space/Reach: 40ft. by 40ft./25ft.
Special Attcks: Improved grab, horrid constriction 4d6+12, spells
Special Qualities: Divine qualities, damage reduction 40/+4, divine fast healing 50/round, SR 37, darkvision 60ft., water subtype, fire resistance 25, sonic resistance 25, alter size, alter form
Saves: Fort +39, Ref +31, Will +37
Abilities: Str 42, Dex 12, Con 29, Int 33, Wis 27, Cha 29
Skills: Alchemy +56, Climb +61, Concentration +54, Cthulhu Mythos +56, Hide -15, Knowledge (arcana) +56, Knowledge (undead) +56, Knowledge (geography) +56, Knowledge (history) +56, Knowledge (planes) +56, Knowledge (religion) +50, Listen +55, Scry +56, Search +56, Spellcraft +56, Spot +55, Swim 38
Feats: Alertness, Cleace, Combat Reflexes, Great Fortitude, Improved Critical (tentacle), Improved Initiative, Iron Will, Lightning Reflexs, Power Attack, Sunder, Weapon Focus (tentacle)
Climate/Terrain: Aquatic
Organization: Unique
Challenge: 34
Treasure: Double Standard
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Advancement: None
Sanity Loss: 1d10/d%

 

[Royta]

So, we sort of resolved the problem.
We talked about it a bit with our friend and then later with the girl. But they also had some information for us before we could even start.
She won't be able to join us every week due to her internship. Meaning every odd week we'll be just the guys and then some weeks she'll be there.

This eleviates a lot of the problem for most of us, including me. That way we have our 'men amongst eachother' time and she can still stay in the party which pleases our friend.

A couple of other notes we talked about:
- we all did our very best to roleplay heavy last session and she joined in, and lateron we subtly said how much more fun that was then her metagaming for treasure all the time. She responded a bit annoyed to it, but go the message.
- we managed to get a small nerf out of her character. Damage got tuned a bit and she now has to choose spells she knowns every level out of the Oracle spells and Druid Spells.

It's still not perfect, but it's a big improvement. Thank you all for the advice; I thought I owed you all an ending to the situation

Greetings!