I not understand you...i no speak engliz

[Ph33nix]

german, or even better latin it sounds like some far east language and very few people speak it.

 

[Quoth]

I often find that a paraphrased quote from the Monty Python & the Holy Grail is useful..

In a mock french accent; "I am not vary keeen as I already got waan!"

 

[Cherry Cola]

I say it to them straight and forward.

'Fuck off, I'm not interested'

I do give money to anyone who plays an accordion though, it's a rule of mine.

My GOD then you should never visit Bulgaria or Serbia MOCK my words mate or you wont have enough money to buy yourself a return ticket

It's actually "mark" my words, not mock. You really can't speak English, can you?

I'm just kidding, of course ^^

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

So my question is have you guys ever resort to pretending to get away from ppl trying to sell you stuff or just didnt want to talk with some weird stranger?

I don't have to pretend. I either hold up my hand and say "No thanks mate", or turn on the dark cloud of doom. No-one goes near me when I'm huddled up, hunter-like.

As for languages, just say: В советском Россия, продукт продает вас!

(In Soviet Russia, product sells you!)

 

[OmegaXIII]

The Socialist Workers Party keep pestering me when i try and go to the library at my university, they don't anymore simply because the last time they tried i flatly replied 'You know, Hitler was a socialist.'

Otherwise i love using 'Oh really, before we start let me introduce you to someone *points to self* this is man not caring.'

 

[Amnestic]

That depends, I'm a sucker for a cute girl... A very cute girl exfoliated my hands for me in an outlet shopping centre recently in an attempt to get me to buy skin care products.

I have no idea what "exfoliated my hands" means but it sounds hot.

It really depends if I have somewhere to be. Sometimes I'll humour them for a while, might even sign up to whatever newsletter e-mail they're plugging as long as it's free. Other times they get the glare.

 

[Azmael Silverlance]

So my question is have you guys ever resort to pretending to get away from ppl trying to sell you stuff or just didnt want to talk with some weird stranger?

I don't have to pretend. I either hold up my hand and say "No thanks mate", or turn on the dark cloud of doom. No-one goes near me when I'm huddled up, hunter-like.

As for languages, just say: В советском Россия, продукт продает вас!

(In Soviet Russia, product sells you!)

well it was just an example. I was wondering whatever in general other ppl like me start blabering in a different language to get away from an annoying situation xD
Tbh anything said in Russian would probably invite Vodka bottles thrown at you

 

[Communist partisan]

yust say "Don't take a step closer if you don't too end up in a body bag".

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

well it was just an example. I was wondering whatever in general other ppl like me start blabering in a different language to get away from an annoying situation xD

You could always go with

*looks over shoulder*
"No Mother, he didn't mean that. Stop shouting at me."

And then turning back, smiling.

 

[GodofDisaster]

I smile politely and reply."Thanks for the offer, but I'm afraid I'm not interested bye."

Although I will become annoyed if they keep asking me.

 

[Nickolai77]

I just start shouting at them in German.
It scares a few children, and it makes a few old people (Probably WWII vets) give me the evil eyes, but damn, its awesome!
"Sie werden nicht verkaufen, die zu mir! Ich will, dass an Sie zu verkaufen, du Hure!"
translates to
"You will not sell that to me! I will sell that to you, you whore!"

lol, i tried pretending to be a German exchange student, but i can not do the German accent..still, it gets them so confused it works. Usually giving them the blank "i don't understand impression" works if they try to talk to me, and i would mutter something in German. Usuually though i have my headphones in and i pretend not to hear them.

 

[Rancid0ffspring]

I had one recently, she stopped me for a "chat" & asked me how I was? So I proceded to tell her about my day so far, some of the tricks I'd done on my skates, my plans for the evening & even asked if she fancied joining me & my friends later on that evening. After a good few minutes of me rambling she tried to sell me an african orphan or something. "I already give to charities when I can" I said then again tried to convince her to join me & my friends later.

If I have the time i'll attempt to waste theirs as much as possible. I know they are just doing their jobs but it is fun to mess with them if they don't choose their words carefully

Being a bastard is fun sometimes :]

 

[AvsJoe]

I often pretend I'm a completely different person in these situations, be it a rich douchebag (one of my favourites), a "special" person (I'm not too bad at that one), a Jehova's Witness-type religious person, or an asshole with a place to go. Trust me when I say I never end up with a flyer.

 

[Ildecia]

I know enough german to get out of that situation thankfully >_>

agreed! its always fun to mess with peoples heads.. scare the shit out of 'em works too

(im fluent in german... so... they can suck a fat one!)

 

[cathou]

depend of the situation. Once a newspaper called me to sell me a subscription and i started crying on the phone telling him that i didnt know how to read. and to jehovah witnesses, i just say : "oh, i will talk about it with my wife" and it enough to scare them away...

for people on the street, i just say that i dont have any money on me (which is often true ayway i always pay with my bank card)

 

[UnravThreads]

From working in Retail, I can tell you "I don't speak English" is absolutely irritating. Did they just say it in French and I magically understood?

A simple 'Sorry, I'm not interested' suffices, IMHO.

 

[Bagaloo]

I say it to them straight and forward.

'Fuck off, I'm not interested'

I do give money to anyone who plays an accordion though, it's a rule of mine.

You could be a little nicer about it. They are only doing a job, trying to earn some cash. A simple "No thank you" should suffice, no need for the profanity.

 

[O277]

We were in Prague once and this girl came up to us started speaking to us in Czech, so we said we were English sorry (which we are) and continued walking, but then she "Oh right, can I talk to you in English then?" We were so impressed we gave her about 500CR, it was for some Prague anti drug thing.

Lesson learned, never get drunk and walk around in Prague because you give your money away to nice talky English ladies.