I think my friend might have Aspergers.

[SlasherX]

So, I have friend who is a troll. Now he is not just a troll on the internet he is a troll in real life. He seems to not know what social boundaries are. He will piss you off to make himself have enjoyment and is just a dick and annoying as fuck. But a good 1/4th of the time he is normal. He acts like a normal person. Carries on a conversation normally, acts decent and then it's like he flips a switch and boom, full on dick mode. I'm not totally sure if it's the affect of his brothers, who are dicks but act normal way more than him or if it is actually Aspergers. I know he had autism as a kid, but he apparently grew out of it. So I'm not totally sure if I should continue hanging out with him Escapist members. What are you thoughts.


Also, we have been pretty good friends for a few years and he considers me his best friend. Also, his family is loaded, have taken me on two family vacations for completely free and just got a pool, but it's just annoying to go over there and get rolled constantly. I know I sound like a whiny ***** but hey watever.

 

[Antari]

Money can't buy you manners. Doesn't sound like aspergers to me, just sounds like a spoiled kid. The choice is yours, free vacations, or dealing with a few assholes

 

[Jordi]

I think Aspergers is widely self diagnosed and overdiagnosed and used as an excuse by people to act like dicks. Just because someone is a dick doesn't mean they have Aspergers. Having said that, I don't know of course and it is related to autism. I would say the best course of action is to talk to him or his parents about it. If he doesn't have Aspergers then you will have just confronted him about being a dick, which will probably get you into a fight, but may be something he needs to hear.

Also, I have to say, OP: your last paragraph seems to be the answer to the obvious question "why are you still friends then?", and you bringing up their wealth as a reason makes me think that you might not be the best person ever either.

 

[LobsterFeng]

He might just be antisocial. Maybe not to the extreme, but he doesn't seem to have a grasp on other peoples feelings too much.

 

[TheMagicIndian]

I think Aspergers is widely self diagnosed and overdiagnosed and used as an excuse by people to act like dicks. Just because someone is a dick doesn't mean they have Aspergers.

Pretty much this. Asperger's is just an excuse to act like a dick and get away with it. Personally, I don't give a shit if someone is diagnosed as having Asperger's. If they act like a dick to me, my response will always be the same whether or not they've been diagnosed. I have no love for people that cannot control themselves.

Just because you can act like a dick, doesn't mean you should. Too many people nowadays think that it's cool or hip to act like a ponce and it just annoys me to no end.

 

[WolfThomas]

Aspergers is part of a whole spectrum of austistic disorders and the diagnosis is made on history, so it's possible but only a psychiatrist can really make that decision. But then again it could be anything from an anti-social personality disorder or even something like undiagnosed schizophrenia (it not always obvious hallucinations).

Bottom line your friend acts like a dick and you're (most likely) not a doctor. Yikes that sounds harsher than I mean, but yeah aspergers is very commonly diagnosed (especially self) by people with no qualification to do so.

Edit: Okay you said in the OP he had austism, you don't stop hating it.

 

[farq1414]

I think Aspergers is widely self diagnosed and overdiagnosed and used as an excuse by people to act like dicks. Just because someone is a dick doesn't mean they have Aspergers.

Pretty much this. Asperger's is just an excuse to act like a dick and get away with it. Personally, I don't give a shit if someone is diagnosed as having Asperger's. If they act like a dick to me, my response will always be the same whether or not they've been diagnosed. I have no love for people that cannot control themselves.

Just because you can act like a dick, doesn't mean you should. Too many people nowadays think that it's cool or hip to act like a ponce and it just annoys me to no end.

it annoys me too and i have it. No realy a doctor told me so and i find this annoying when people use it as an escape when they don't have

 

[FalloutJack]

So, I have friend who is a troll. Now he is not just a troll on the internet he is a troll in real life. He seems to not know what social boundaries are. He will piss you off to make himself have enjoyment and is just a dick and annoying as fuck. But a good 1/4th of the time he is normal. He acts like a normal person. Carries on a conversation normally, acts decent and then it's like he flips a switch and boom, full on dick mode. I'm not totally sure if it's the affect of his brothers, who are dicks but act normal way more than him or if it is actually Aspergers. I know he had autism as a kid, but he apparently grew out of it. So I'm not totally sure if I should continue hanging out with him Escapist members. What are you thoughts.


Also, we have been pretty good friends for a few years and he considers me his best friend. Also, his family is loaded, have taken me on two family vacations for completely free and just got a pool, but it's just annoying to go over there and get rolled constantly. I know I sound like a whiny ***** but hey watever.

There's the crux of the matter right there. You don't grow out of autism. People with autism are approaching the world from a different angle, experiencing it probably different from the norm. Things that we miss will be obvious to them and vice versa because of it. He will not cease to be autistic, though. He has to adapt himself to the world as a completely foreign person must learn to operate within a different society. So, on that note, social cues can/will be missed.

Mind you, it is equally possible for him to be a dick AND autistic, as there is no rule that says they can't.

 

[smithy_2045]

You can have Asperger's without being a dick, you know...

 

[rex922]

You can have Asperger's without being a dick, you know...

I'm pretty sure this is also true.
I hate all the self-diagnosed nonsense that people say just to expect me to put up with their bullshit.

Some should really learn some manners and at least behave like a decent human being

 

[Leon Last Lord Shyle]

I think Aspergers is widely self diagnosed and overdiagnosed and used as an excuse by people to act like dicks. Just because someone is a dick doesn't mean they have Aspergers.

Pretty much this. Asperger's is just an excuse to act like a dick and get away with it. Personally, I don't give a shit if someone is diagnosed as having Asperger's. If they act like a dick to me, my response will always be the same whether or not they've been diagnosed. I have no love for people that cannot control themselves.

Just because you can act like a dick, doesn't mean you should. Too many people nowadays think that it's cool or hip to act like a ponce and it just annoys me to no end.

it annoys me too and i have it. No realy a doctor told me so and i find this annoying when people use it as an escape when they don't have

Ditto but i do have to say if you did not get diagnosed at a young age chances are you will have to suffice with self diagnosis, I am 20 and it took them four years to finally get me the damn diagnosis wherein i spent about an hour with the guy for him to just say "well this was the easiest diagnosis I've ever done you most definitely have it"

Only annoying thing is now my mum likes to write off my family who are a bunch of dicks as having it because "its genetic"

 

[Vanalosswen]

Funnily enough, a lot of the people I know who have Asperger's or are fully autistic aren't all that dickish. They have varying levels of control over themselves, but for the most part, they tend to get REALLY focused on one thing. And those that I know, they know they don't have social skills, so they either overcompensate and are irritating, or they go all quiet and shy whenever they're around people.

But I'm not a doctor, so my knowledge of Asperger's (and autism in general) is just from some reading and observation. If you don't want to hang with him, don't. If you get something from the relationship, be it the cool vacations or if he's really a cool guy when he's not being a dick, then stay his friend and know that you'll have to deal with the 3/4ths of the time when he IS a dick.

 

[LongAndShort]

Sounds like he's just a dick. The few people I've met with Aspergers or autism were decent, friendly people, who didn't quite understand that sometimes they needed to keep their mouths shut, or open them. As I said, your mate just sounds like a dick. Do as you will. I'd stop hanging around, personally.

 

[OutforEC]

The three people I know who have been diagnosed with varying degrees of autism and/or aspergers aren't as you're describing in the least, at least not regularly. Social calibration levels are different for different people, and not having a filter between your brain and mouth means saying some pretty outlandish things sometimes, but normally it's pretty easy to just roll with it once you get used to it.

Now if your friend is just being a dick to be a dick, that's different.

 

[Sneipen]

I'd just like to back up Revelo on what he's said here. (You pretty much ninjad me, mate )
This is all true and precise, so i wont go into detail on the syndrome itself.

Rather, i'd stay on topic and answer to the main quiestion of the thread. Should you stop hanging out with this lad? I dunno, thats a problem i'll stay completely nutral to. What you should do is tell him how he behaves, and that it is unacteptable. If anyone had dragged aspergers as an exuse for their behavior to me, real or not, i'd concider that a new low. If ever aspergers is dragged as an exuse, all rights to immediate forgiveness or help is removed. (and if i get my saying, allong with the speakers face). Speaking as an asperger (yes, proffesionaly diagnosed) i'd realy take offence if someone used it as a shield. Thinking about it, i take slight offence when treat me diffrently, altough i understand it is necesary sometimes .

Theres one more thing i'd like to underline a few times. Remember that all aspergers arn't the same. They're nice/goofy/stubborn/dickheads in an equal degree as everyone else. So i realy doubt asperger alone is the reason he acts this way. If he's an idiot AND have aspergers, the already existing idiot will be reinforced, as aspergers can reinforce meany of your existing traits. But the point im so painfully trying to make here is that it realy isn't aspergers alone that does this. And i'd hate to see it labeled as an "Asshole-syndrome". Expecialy thinking of how much the extra interest boost has helped a lot of people.

Well, this rant whent on a little longer than i expected

 

[Vrex360]

I myself actually have Aspergers, though admittedly mine is very mild and I don't know much about the symptoms. I just know because I was diagnozed as having it by a doctor quite some time ago.

But anyway as far as this spontanious anger thing goes, I have that from time to time as well but I can never be sure if it isn't just me being ranty because of something I read off the interwebs or because something's happened that just frustrates me. But I do know that with the right amount of anxiety I can get very aggressive.
However, like I said, I'm not sure if this is my asperger's or if I'm just highly strung.

I do think that my inability to stay focussed on one topic at a time when my mind instead becomes unfocused and I start thinking intently about something else entirely. I can become quite obsessed and focused on very minor things but I find it hard to pay attention sometimes.

As it stands, I have asperger's but I'm no expert on the subject. So hence, with what you've given me, I can admit that certain aspects of his behavior are certainly similar to stuff I do but I can't be sure if it's aspergers causing it or just aggression.

 

[Griffolion]

So, I have friend who is a troll. Now he is not just a troll on the internet he is a troll in real life. He seems to not know what social boundaries are. He will piss you off to make himself have enjoyment and is just a dick and annoying as fuck. But a good 1/4th of the time he is normal. He acts like a normal person. Carries on a conversation normally, acts decent and then it's like he flips a switch and boom, full on dick mode. I'm not totally sure if it's the affect of his brothers, who are dicks but act normal way more than him or if it is actually Aspergers. I know he had autism as a kid, but he apparently grew out of it. So I'm not totally sure if I should continue hanging out with him Escapist members. What are you thoughts.


Also, we have been pretty good friends for a few years and he considers me his best friend. Also, his family is loaded, have taken me on two family vacations for completely free and just got a pool, but it's just annoying to go over there and get rolled constantly. I know I sound like a whiny ***** but hey watever.

Aspergers is typically characterised with a lack of empathy, theoretical or hypothetical understanding of social norms (such as humour) but lack the ability to engage or understand the emotional intent of them, narrow areas of interest (for instance, collecting the names of stars while knowing very little on the broader subject of astronomy), Miscomprehention of nuance in speech (eg sarcasm), often robotic tone of voice, inability to comprehend figurative language (metaphors, similies, imagery etc; "the grass was a wavy sea of green") but have an above-average mastery of literal language ("the dog is brown"). There are other symptoms but these tend to be the main ones found in the majority of cases.

Sometimes, they can get very anal on topics and have the ability to pick up on tiny dissonances between something said by someone and what is actually the case. For instance, someone says something referencing a tomato being a vegetable. An individual with Aspergers would have an utter field day on that, especially if one of their narrow areas of interest are fruit/veg etc.

We all rank on the Asperger spectrum in some way, but the vast majority of us are way below clinical levels of the syndrome. The individuals with Aspergers Syndrome diagnosed are at or above clinical diagnosis levels as defined by the DSM. I personally sometimes have trouble with empathy, but then I will get lucid moments where I think about someone I know who is going through something and feel so sorry for them it's untrue.

But if you can put up with the guy being how he is then fine, if not maybe expand your friendship circle a little more, or cultivate less close friendships with others you know.

Captcha: contains tedifir - What has Lord Inglip sent to the FDA?

 

[Pearwood]

So, I have friend who is a troll.

Asperger's isn't defined as "being a dick". Maybe he's just a dick.

 

[SlasherX]

Snip

I have a good many friends its just that when he isn't being a dick he is pretty cool. Also its not just the being a dick thing. It is like he has literally no idea how to act. He is rude, doesn't get on well with almost anyone, does literally disgusting things. It's just that I feel no one could be this fucked up a good majority of the time without having something wrong wtih them.