If You could be Any Video Game character...

[bigfatcarp93]

READ DIS.

Due to the relative success of my previous thread ([link]http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.837978-If-Your-could-be-any-Comic-Character?page=1[/link] And hey, I spelled the title right this time!) I've decided to go again with a new thing: this time, video game characters.

Again, the rules are the same:

You must live the entire character's life from beginning to end. You experience their victories and failures, their joys and pains, their enemies and friends.

And this should go without saying:

NO.

RPG.

PROTAGONISTS.

No Commander Shepard, Fable Kid, Dovahkin, Grey Warden, nothing that is fluid or can be heavily customized. Blank slate characters like Gordon Freeman or Doomguy are okay, I guess. (Though why ANYONE would want to be Doomguy escapes me.)

Can't say I really have much of a choice myself.

EDIT: FUCK ME AND THREAD TITLES. I should've known the Italic wouldn't work...

 

[tippy2k2]

EDIT: FUCK ME AND THREAD TITLES. I should've known the Italic wouldn't work...

You know when you go into EDIT, you can change the thread title...

OT: I'm not sure since we really have no clue what 99% of characters life is like before and after their grand adventure. I'll assume that this person's life was all sunshine and rainbows before and after the game...

I really can't think of anyone yet (I just wanted to let you know about the edit thing). I'll keep thinking but everyone I can think of is either nothing like me or really really bad things happen to them

Right now, I'm thinking Welkin Gunther (Valkyria Chronicles). I'm not a big fan of the outdoors but he is so I assume that will mean that I will be too. Sure, some bad things do happen to him but there are very few games where you're getting out of it cleanly. Plus, Alicia Melchiott is your friend and she is freaking hot!

...what!?!? Don't look at me like that!

 

[bigfatcarp93]

EDIT: FUCK ME AND THREAD TITLES. I should've known the Italic wouldn't work...

You know when you go into EDIT, you can change the thread title...

OT: I'm not sure since we really have no clue what 99% of characters life is like before and after their grand adventure. I'll assume that this person's life was all sunshine and rainbows before and after the game...

I really can't think of anyone yet (I just wanted to let you know about the edit thing). I'll keep thinking but everyone I can think of is either nothing like me or really really bad things happen to them

Right now, I'm thinking Welkin Gunther (Valkyria Chronicles). I'm not a big fan of the outdoors but he is so I assume that will mean that I will be too. Sure, some bad things do happen to him but there are very few games where you're getting out of it cleanly. Plus, Alicia Melchiott is your friend and she is freaking hot!

...what!?!? Don't look at me like that!

Bear in mind it need not be a protagonist. Any villain or supporting character is acceptable.

 

[The Wykydtron]

Is there any better option? Hazama from BlazBlue. Trolling the entire cast is his only reason for existence, he literally ceases to be if everyone stops hating him. Yes, that's easier said than done considering all the lives he's ruined. A good description would be a Japanese take on The Joker, he takes all of five minutes to break Tsubaki's mind in two just because she was unfortunate enough to be in a conversation with him and he got bored with it.

Also Naoto Shirogane from Persona 4. An ace detective with gender issues ain't so bad, probably would be interesting. Also Yosuke because his fantastic story mode in Arena is worth all the lame crap he's done in his life beforehand. He legitimately is the coolest and most badass character in the story, yes including God Mode Elisabeth.

They wrote life's biggest loser somehow winning everything and made it seem perfectly in-character. Fuck it, Yosuke for best video character 2013, i'm going there.

For the love of god, yes it WAS a 2012 release for all you lucky sods across the Pond but over here in Europeland we had a wait almost a full year. So don't you all clamour to correct me. Again.

 

[Chessrook44]

If Blank Slate characters are ok, then I pick the nameless protagonist from the Myst games. Because I just love Myst.

 

[kilenem]

Bear in mind it need not be a protagonist. Any villain or supporting character is acceptable.

Villian? I'll be Vaz. Easily one of the Best Villianz of all time. He's up there with Joker and DOOM.

 

[mrhappy1489]

Hmmm, I think that I'd take the life of Edward Kenway. Who the hell wouldn't want to be a pirate. Yeah I might have painfully dull offspring, but I get to be a awesome fucking pirate!

 

[Ender910_v1legacy]

Probably either Kyle Katarn or Maarek Stele from Tie Fighter. They were both professionals just doing their job, and trying not to make a mess of things, while occasionally playing the hero. And I appreciate that at least the wars and conflicts they had to face were.. a little less messy and political than the kind of insanity we face in the real world today. And before George Lucas started screwing things up with the prequels.

 

[bigfatcarp93]

Bear in mind it need not be a protagonist. Any villain or supporting character is acceptable.

Villian? I'll be Vaz. Easily one of the Best Villianz of all time. He's up there with Joker and DOOM.

Could you mean Vaas? Or is this a character I don't know?

 

[bug_of_war]

Blank slate characters like Gordon Freeman or Doomguy are okay, I guess. (Though why ANYONE would want to be Doomguy escapes me.)

Why the fuck would anyone wanna be Gordon Freeman escapes me.

OT:

The Boss from Saints Row. The game is not an RPG, the story is linear, and shits and giggles.

 

[Chaos Isaac]

Hrm... Probably Vyse from Tales of Arcadia.

I'm a pirate. IN THE SKY.

I'm cool with that.

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

I don't know. I think about all the game characters, whether protagonist or npc and I just... I wouldn't want that kind of life. All I want is peace and when interesting things happen around you, nothing is ever peaceful. Plus it would be torture to live in some of those gameworlds.

 

[A Weakgeek]

Duke Nukem. You get to blast aliens and sex up wimmins.

I wouldn't wan't to get smashed after just one beer though.

 

[Serinanth]

Ratchet seems to have a pretty interesting life.

He is a mechanical genius, gets to travel through space and time, has a robotic best buddy, and is probably one of the most bad ass warriors there ever was. I mean seriously the guy just mows down hordes of enemies in the arenas while avoiding innumerable environmental hazards. Granted its some what based on his arsenal of weapons and toys but it does not seem like many others in his universe can compete.

His kind was wiped and I bet that makes his life a little lonely but he seems to make friends no matter what race they are, and he does not do too bad in the ladies dept either.

Sure he has had some rough times, but he usually wins out in the end.

Ratchet for President!

 

[brenz]

Mario.

You get to kick ass, spit flame balls, grow big and stomp shit, fly, ride clouds, have a dinosaur mate.
You get to shag princess peach in her sweet castle, and then when you get sick of the ***** moaning all day bowzer takes her away for a while, when you get horny you go kick some ass and save her, then shag again.
Sweet life.

 

[FPLOON]

Easy...

Rayman!!!

Saving Lums and the like using both my armless hands and my legless feet... and still have time to crack a smile when needed...

(YEAH!!!)

 

[ViridianV6]

Rex Power Colt from Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon, because if you are not doing everything in your power to become a Mark IV cyber commando, what are you even doing with your life?

 

[Jurian]

I am already Stanley from the Stanley parable.

 

[Gorbachof]

Its Ironic that you say we can't be a "Blank Slate Character," those are often the most engaging because we already put ourselves (albeit to various degrees and subconsciousness) in/as those characters.

If I could be ANYONE (at least at this very second, I'd choose the Lone Wanderer.

If I must stay with you criteria... Robert Lutece* possibly, The whole inter dimensional know it all prick seems like an appealing lifestyle for me.


*subject to change without notice; decisions vary on a case by case basis; please consult your doct--

Blank slate characters like Gordon Freeman or Doomguy are okay, I guess. (Though why ANYONE would want to be Doomguy escapes me.)

Why the fuck would anyone wanna be Gordon Freeman escapes me.

Could you Image 8 years at MIT having to write a thesis on "Observation of Einstein-Podolsky-Rosen Entanglement on Supraquantum Structures by Induction Through Nonlinear Transuranic Crystal of Extremely Long Wavelength (ELW) Pulse from Mode-Locked Source Array."

EDIT: I suppose the G-Man would also be a good pick.