A 101 Megaton Thermonuclear hug bomb on my fellow escapists. Specifically I'd drop it on the forehead of the first person to post after me who misread the "Ampersand" in my name for "Hampersand" or "Ham per Sand". It'd incite the warm fuzzy feeling of hugs to all who are within it's range. And afterwards when it's over, people won't like the fact that the fuzzy feeling is going away so either they actually hug someone or, if they refuse to hug or be hugged, they'll die of madness as the feeling gets them into severe hug withdrawl. It'd either make people huggy or dead! MUHAHAHAHAHA!
On a more(?) serious note I'd get the poster 7 posts after me to choke to death on cyanide pills because they're a prick, I hate them and they have no friends.