I want to say the robot from Fallout NV (the happy one that helps you take over NV, I can't remember his name for the life of me). Either that or General Knoxx from borderlands, he officially ranks as one of my favorite bad guys because he has to put up with a 5 year old boss, what a guy.....
Kyle Katarn. That guy's been on some pretty sweet missions and is the coolest character in the SW universe. Plus he's sarcastic, which is an endearing quality.
I would go for either Solid Snake (young Snake, not Old) 'cause hes AWESOME, and I would get to meet a few of his buddies, or Jill Valentine, 'cause, you know, damn.
I'd go with either Alyx Vance, because she always seemed nice, intelligent and with a sense of humor, or Niko Bellic from GTA IV, because he thinks a lot, and it would be interesting to discuss things with him.
But honestly, it'd be John Freeman, who was Gordon Freemans brother, and one day an office.
I think a good one would be JC Denton from Deus Ex. I'd have a little conversation with him.
Me: Hey JC, what's happening? Taking down some more conspiracies am I right?
JC: Yep, still at it.
Me: Hey, I've got something that will help you out with that, just let me get it.
At this point I rummage through my desk drawer for a bit before stopping.
Me: Oh... my god! Someone put a bomb in my desk. A freakin' bomb in my desk. They're trying to stop us.
JC (only mildly alarmed): A bomb.
Okay, I this point I snicker but regain my composure.
Me: It's not safe here! Quick let's go, but first let me get my gun out of the trunk of my car, ya know, just in case.
I open the trunk.
Me: Holy crap! There's a bomb in my car. (I pull out a chunk of PlayDough.) It's a whole block of C-4! We were almost killed by a damn car bomb.
JC: A bomb.
Okay, I can't help but laugh now, but I must go on.
Me: I'm gonna stop by the market. Hey, I'm going to grab a soda from the vending machine. Wait a minute... this quarter... there's something wrong with it. Holy shit on a Popsicle stick! It's a mini-bomb! It would have off the second I put it in the machine!!!
JC: A bomb.
Okay I'm laughing pretty good now; hell, I can't help it.
JC: What's so funny.
Me: Oh nothing, nothing, I was just thinking of a funny part of a television show that nobody watches any more.
JC: Oh, okay.
We enter the market.
Me: Hold on, I want to grab some Hot Pockets.
I reach into the freezer and pull out what appears to be sticks of dynamite strapped together. This one looks full-on Loony Tunes style, with over sized wires, and a giant old alarm clock for a timer.
Me: No way. Those bastards! Those damn dirty goat raping bastards. A bomb, JC, an honest to God Hot-Pocket-Freezer-Bomb.
JC: A bomb.
Alright, at this point I have to excuse myself while I race to the restroom because I'm about to pee my pants. I burst into hysterics while trying not to bang my head against the wall. Finally, I return.
JC: We'd better move. I'll use my augmented vision to strip search everyone here for any additional threats.
Me: Uh yeah, you do that.
We go outside to find a van that I placed a small 'radiation hazard' decal on.
Me: Oh, fuck me! FUCK ME!!! THIS IS A NUCLEAR BOMB! THEY'RE GOING TO RAZE THE ENTIRE CITY JUST TO GET TO US!!!!! IT'S A CHICKEN-STRANGLING, BALL-BUSTING NUCLEAR BOMB!!!
JC: A bomb.
At this point I fall to the ground. I roll around laughing so hard that I cramp up at least a dozen muscles. There's a distinct possibility that I could rupture something, and will definitely have be examined for a hernia after this, but its worth it; oh so worth it. I've been secretly recording the whole thing on video, and you better believe that this shit's going on YouTube.
Or, I wouldn't mind hanging out with Jill Valentine. We could take a long walk, make small talk, chit chat about the end of the world. I could take her to lunch at a nice bistro. As the sun was setting, I would have a revelation.
"Jill." I'd say as I gazed into her eyes.
"Yes?" she'd respond softly.
"I think... I think I locked my keys in my car."
"Wow, that sucks."
"I was wondering, since we had such a lovely day together, would you be so kind as to open the door so I can get them?"
"How the hell am I suppose to get your car door open?"
"Woah, wait, hold on. You're telling me that you, Jill Valentine, the master of unlocki..."
"I have to kill you now."
"Ack! What are you doing? Hey, wait! Where are you going? Don't you want to make a 'Jill Sandwich'? *sigh*"
My life can be like that sometimes.
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